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acceptance of short hair

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xxxzvp View Drop Down
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    Posted: May 18 2005 at 3:34pm
   After what seemed like forever my wife has finally gone quite short, about an inch long on the sides and back, and longer on top. She would be willing to go radically shorter, but she gets terrible negative comments from her co-workers, and takes them to heart. In the past she had a very cute pixie(Alyssa Milano's,except shorter), and another time a soft buzz with bangs, and her co-workers called her butch,mannish, and said that she had a "lesbian Haircut".Nothing could be further from the truth, she looked sexier,slimmer,and younger. Do any of you short haired laidies ever encounter such troubles, and what do you do about it?I love to see her in short hair, and she loves it too.
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Debbie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Debbie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 18 2005 at 4:23pm
You can only be hurt if you allow it.  And I do mean that in a nice way!    People are mean, and they do say cruel things!  I just look at them, when I have had some one ask me about mine, and say back to them "why?".  If they keep up I then proceed to tell them that I have a mortage, and a water bill, a phone , etc.  Untill a person is willing to pay my bills, they need to keep quiet.  Is she just  cannot take it, ask her if a wig would help any?  Some people you cannot please if you hand them everything they ever wanted on a silver platter!  Good luck to you and your wife!  Debbie
There is more to life than hair...Come on---Go get a life!!!!!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eatgreenjello Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 18 2005 at 5:58pm

As long as YOU and your wife like her new short cut, that is all that's important.  I know it's hard to "tune-out" people's negative comments!  It just seems like people always think they know what's best for you, but only YOU know what's best for you.

Her coworkers will get used to her new cut.  People resist change.  They can't take it when other people make a radical change.  And that's too bad!

Just keep telling her how much YOU like it, and that's all that matters.


**Hair type: 2a, which is wavy and fine.
**Color: Naturally dark brown, currently dyed reddish brown.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kimblonde35 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 18 2005 at 9:09pm

I am going thru the same thing right now, except it's my "parents" who tell me that I shouldn't have short hair. (And I'm 35 years old) haha  Well I have had my short hair for a couple of years now you would think that they would get used to it by now. haha   I used to have below shoulder length hair and then when I had that hairstyle then they would say, "Kim, why don't you get your hair cut short"  UGH!!  Some people (including parents) you just can't please!  I was planning on letting my hair grow long again (not because they said that I should) but now I'm going to keep it short, for one it's alot easier to take care of and also I get alot of compliments on my short spiked bleach blonde hair! :-)   And I have always had short hair except for that one time 3 years ago.  Here is some pic's of what my hair looks like now!!

http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=2126535960

I'd say your wife should do what's best for HER and not listen to anyone else,  I know it's hard when people are nagging at you all the time about your hair.   Does your wife have any pics of her hair that she would like to share?  I would really like to see her hair!  Kim

 

 

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Kuroneko View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kuroneko Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 20 2005 at 2:57am

If they're female co-workers, they're probably just jealous 'cause they wish they could have short hair, but their husbands tell them not to :-P .  Either that, or they find themselves suddenly attracted to her and want her to change back so as not to tempt them ^_^ .  *dodges shoes thrown at her for that last remark*

If they're male co-workers, they probably see her as more of a threat to their jobs when her hair is short :-P .  *gets ready to dodge more shoes just in case*

The only complaints I can ever remember getting over hair were from friends and relatives :-P .  Sometimes the people we know best can be a thousand times more cruel than strangers!

More awesome than a manatee!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eKatherine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 20 2005 at 10:38pm
Originally posted by xxxzvp xxxzvp wrote:

...and another time a soft buzz with bangs, and her co-workers called her butch,mannish, and said that she had a "lesbian Haircut". Nothing could be further from the truth, she looked sexier,slimmer,and younger.


Beauty and style are very subjective things. You looked at your wife's hairstyle and saw she looked sexier, slimmer, and younger. They looked and saw something very different - what looked, for all intents and purposes, to be an in-your-face political statement.

Were they "wrong" and you "right" about the attractiveness of the cut? Only if you feel you have the right or ability to decide others' tastes for them. Clearly this is an illustration of differences in taste, but there's more here than that.

You'd be wasting your energy trying to change the opinions of people who have previous associations with a style like this. Enjoy it if you wish, but yes, there'll always be that attitude.


Just looking for a few good hair slaves - is that too much to ask?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DaveDecker Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 21 2005 at 1:30pm
Originally posted by Kuroneko Kuroneko wrote:

If they're female co-workers, they're probably just jealous 'cause they wish they could have short hair, but their husbands tell them not to :-P .  Either that, or they find themselves suddenly attracted to her and want her to change back so as not to tempt them ^_^ .


Maybe... or maybe not.

Originally posted by Kuroneko Kuroneko wrote:

If they're male co-workers, they probably see her as more of a threat to their jobs when her hair is short :-P .


Maybe... or maybe not.

:lol:

Actually, I think that the length (whatever it may be) of female colleagues hair don't figure into man's concerns about the disposition of his job.  There are much more relevant things going on that can affect their jobs.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote demodoll Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 22 2005 at 11:06am

My hair is about 2" all over and no one has ever called me mannish or lesbian.  They have, however, asked my why in the world I did this.  So I guess that means they don't like short hair or at least short hair on me.  Mostly I only get negative comments from people who just do not like short hair, period.  Well, I don't like long hair so who is right??  No one.  It should be about what you want.

The other day I saw a 60ish lady with a white spikey buzz with longer bangs.  She looked FABULOUS.  I am sure some people would look at her and say yuck but when you take in the total package she really just looked chic and happy with herself.  I thought she looked better than most of those 20 somethings with long, damaged hair.

Your wife should do what she wants unless she will get fired or something.  Some of the more conservative work places can get kind of weird about how you dress and stuff and if she is in one of those jobs and need to stay employed that could be a consideration. 

"It is better to look marvelous than to feel marvelous" Billy Crystal
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Bob S View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob S Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 22 2005 at 2:20pm

When my wife had pixie hair, she received negative comments from some women and men. I thought it looked good, but then I think most women look good with short hair. Oddly enough, now that her hair is hip length (my *strong* preference), it's my wife who sometimes makes snide remarks to me about women who wear their hair no shorter than she once did.

Bottom line: If you and DW like it, who cares what others think? You can't change the world. Some will always hate short hair with a passion.  Bob 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kimblonde35 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 22 2005 at 10:36pm

DemoDoll,

I went to the bank the other day and the banker there is in her late 50's and I just love her hair, she has short spiked hair and her hair color is red and her glasses match the color of her hair, she looks awesome! When I came up to her she said to me,  "OH wow I just love your hair!" and I said back to her,  "I was thinking of the same thing about YOUR hair" haha

So I guess no matter how old you are you can still look awesome! ;-)

Kim

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote demodoll Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 23 2005 at 6:23am

I think it is very interesting to note that most "older" women who look really chic and stunning almost always have really short, short hair.  Makes you wonder if some of those young girls with the long, long hair might just look better with their hair really short. 

It is nice to  think that no matter what your age is you can still look really good.  I think for us older folks it is just a matter of good grooming.

"It is better to look marvelous than to feel marvelous" Billy Crystal
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kuroneko Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 24 2005 at 12:04am

I think I like this line of thinking ^_^ .

Originally posted by demodoll demodoll wrote:

I think it is very interesting to note that most "older" women who look really chic and stunning almost always have really short, short hair.  Makes you wonder if some of those young girls with the long, long hair might just look better with their hair really short.

More awesome than a manatee!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote demodoll Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 24 2005 at 6:37am

Think about all the really beautiful women who look much better without much hair.  Halley Berry comes immediately to mind, and what about Sharon Stone (have you seen her dreadful extensions?), Audrey Hepburn, Alyssa Milano, Charlise Theron.  I could probably name more but it is early in the morning and I can't think.

"It is better to look marvelous than to feel marvelous" Billy Crystal
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote alvin8191 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 24 2005 at 8:13am
Demodoll..... chic is the word. I know of a few "middle aged" (early forties to late fifties) business/professional type women in my area women who wear very short well groomed stlyes and they look great! Some of them actually seem to get a little better looking as they get a year or two older. One inparticular with silvery grey hair who is stunning.  
short is good, buzzed is better, bald is best!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nickp Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 24 2005 at 4:48pm

a really interesting thread as i think alot of people encounter this problem, especially with regards to hair as a change in hair style can make a person look entirely different..

im a 19 year old guy whose had short hair all my life, and then last year i decided why not try grow it long? i guess im quite sensitive, and yeh i got alot of stick for it to the point where i actually got it all cut..and then i got aload of negative comments cause people said it was too short! some really mean comments as well..

and its then when u start thinking, hang on a sec..who the f**k cares? they dont like it long..they dont like it short..why does this have anything to do with what they like and WHY do they think they know whats best...summarised as..

WHO THE HELL ARE THEY? following this simple logical thought process, i concluded that im doing what i want with my hair (Against friends and parents wishes ) and condequently growing it..and have been for the past 6 months..

i get mixed reactions now, some people like it..others dont..i like it which to me means more than a millions peoples comments and furthermore, my girlfriend like it which means more than a billion peoples comments cause truthfully, its only her im trying to impress

i guess ive basically repeated alot of whats been said but as far as i see it, if you base and judge your appearances on other peoples thoughts and opinions, you will never be happy..cause what they 'think' is best for u is very often not what u really want.

 

Nick

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote demodoll Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 25 2005 at 6:22am

You are right Nick, you can't please everyone so you might as well please yourself or someone else you care about.  Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. 

I think a lot of us in this thread just enjoy looking at people who take the time to try to look nice with short hair.

"It is better to look marvelous than to feel marvelous" Billy Crystal
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