QuoteReplyTopic: "We" Getting Left Behind???? Posted: December 22 2005 at 11:07am
On the Verge: Are We Leaving Black Men Behind? As Jill Nelson explains, relationships between Black men and women aren't just suffering from the lingering effects of slavery and ongoing racism--there's also the little matter of our own academic and career success
Spend time with women and the conversation usually comes around to men and relationships--the good, the bad, and the "maybe I can make this work" variety. If the majority of those women are of African descent, relationships are also often discussed, longingly, in the context of women's lack of, and desire for, a positive, fulfilling relationship with a Black man.
Different as we are as individuals, there is some agreement about which elements make a relationship work. One essential ingredient: a man who is hardworking, committed, ambitious, and determined. In short, a man we can actually partner with.
There are obstacles in all relationships. Yet in many cases, African-American women are faced with an additional set of hurdles, many of them the outgrowth of our legacy of slavery and Jim Crow, as well as the continuing existence of White supremacy and White privilege.
The systematic destruction of Black families during and after slavery; the victimization and sexual exploitation of Black women, witnessed by powerless Black men; and the overriding assumption of Black inferiority--and its flip side, White superiority--still have a profoundly negative effect on us and our relationships.
A denial of the continuing emotional and economic impact of this country's unresolved history of slavery is as silly as the refusal by many White Americans to acknowledge any responsibility for White racism or White-skin privilege because, as they indignantly state, "No one in my family ever owned slaves!"
Yet the portrayal of Black men as fearsome, violent, and sexually predatory continues to label and stigmatize them in the culture. Black women may be stereotyped as sex objects, Mammy figures, or invisible. These aren't exactly positive images, but they've allowed us the wiggle room to manipulate the system more effectively than Black men can--to sometimes slide under the radar in ways that Black men often find impossible. This is not to suggest that we are less oppressed, but simply less feared.
Look to the skies and keep your eyes on the prize! I been through Hell but, STILL I RISE!
If you work in corporate America, you see it everyday.
If you go to college, you see it in the class rooms. (what is it, 10 females to 1 male)
If you are over 25 years old,you know for sure what I'm talking about. Cause over half of your male classmates that you grew up with are gone. Where are they? What happen to them?
Most Black women will tell you real fast that there are few black men to marry and even fewer that earn the same amount of money they earn. It's no big secret. Us black men are falling off because we don't go to college. Those that do, many don't graduate because of different reasons. There are many black men graduating but there are 4 time as many black women graduating. Why?
And that's where I'm getting it from, it's not rocket science, just Sociology. Look, Listen, Observe, and Think.
Edited by BIGGMike
Look to the skies and keep your eyes on the prize! I been through Hell but, STILL I RISE!
yeah this is a good article. you cats can go amazon and do a search. type in Nathan Hare. him and his wife have several books discussing the black family and issues such as this. their books are all quick reads. matter of fact, here is the link.
I know I rub people the wrong way, but you know what, I care about BLACK MEN AND THE AFRICAN AMERICAN COMMUNITY. I don't care about what other people think.
These are issues that WE FACE, so it will keep coming until my people wake up and see how they are being used by other people who don't care about BLACK MEN AND THE AFRICAN AMERICAN COMMUNITY.
Look to the skies and keep your eyes on the prize! I been through Hell but, STILL I RISE!
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