Hi, welcome to the site.
I understand where you are coming from, I have naturally curly hair as well and when I was younger I always hated it probably because I didn’t know how to take care of curly hair back then and style it. So I flat ironed the heck out of it and it caused some damaged over time. But now thanks to all the steps I have been taking and the products that I have been using my hair feels incredibly soft, looks very shiny and healthy and is waist length J I have also embraced my curls and now I love them!
It is great that you stopped dying your hair! That is the first step. Since your hair is breaking off a lot at the ends you have to keep it moisturized all the time and use some sort of oil. You won’t see results right away. In the past my hair was breaking at the ends too and I use to have split ends but now I don’t have any breakage and I can hardly ever find a split end. What helped me the most was deep conditioning my hair for at least an hour every week with a good deep conditioner, laying off the heat styling tools, using oils in my hair, shampooing with sulphate free shampoos and I purchased a few hair treatments that really helped as well. Also you should invest in a pair of professional hair cutting scissors or shears; you can get them at Sally’s. Go through your hair at least once a week and cut off any split ends you see, trim them right above the split, and also trim off any ends that look a bit frayed, this way you can focus on a tiny portion of hair at the ends and you won’t lose much length. Do this between trims and then seal your ends with an oil. Also make sure you go to a hair dresser that trims the ends and does not give you an extreme cut as hair dressers like to do. I also use the Tresemme spit remedy as a co wash conditioner once in a while among the other products I use, it is pretty good since its thick and very hydrating for the hair. There are many steps you can take to get your hair looking great again, it will be a long process but it will be well worth it. Your hair will not being to retain length until it begins getting health and strong again but once it does it will have a chance to start growing again. You may have done some permanent damage but that doesn’t mean you can’t turn things around, you just have to keep using great products and keep taking care of it eventually it will get better but be patient.
If you would like to know in more depth what I did to get my hair looking healthy, shiny and beautiful again check out my blog post where I list lots of tips and all of the products and treatments that I have tried and recommend. You can find the blog posting here: http://ericabookandmovie.blogspot.com/2012/02/hair-care-101.html - - http://ericabookandmovie.blogspot.com/2012/02/hair-care-101.html
Good luck
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