holy help me

OK, after reading other posts, I feel so lucky my hair has not fallen out yet.

here's my story... I had a just above the shoulders cut that was professionally and beautifully highlighted. Why on earth I'd want to change it is beyond me. But I decided one day that I wanted all of my hair to be brown.

I bought a home kit of Garnier Nutriesse Golden Brown and it turned out red. I was misinformed by a sales clerk at Sally Beauty Supply that a color lifter named "coolest brown" and red-gold correcter would solve my red problem. Sure didn't. My hair turned a lovely golden green.

At which point I went to my faithful hairstylist crying and begging forgiveness. (She happens to be my very best friend's mom). She put a level 5 Ash Brown on my hair. It was dark, but there was no trace of the infamous red, gold, or green for that matter.

Upon returning to school two hours from home, my boyfriend told me he hated it. It was too dark. Experienced with color, I should have known and trusted it would fade. But I did the unthinkable... I made an appointment at a salon that I was unfamiliar with to get highlights put back in my hair.

Well, they couldn't penetrate all the color with bleach. It came out orange. They told me I could come in in a couple of days and they'd put more bleach on it, but they were fearful given everything my hair had been through.

I freaked out though, and asked them to take it back to brown... anything was better than orange. So, (here's where they screwed up). They immediately started with a level 6, blue-violet. No red base... just going straight for the blue-violet. Just as I had warned them... the highlights barely picked up the color... they tried a couple more things before putting permenant level five on my head.

At home, the highlights still were quite visible and disgustingly golden orange. I made another huge mistake and put medium brown box dye on it. The highlights are more tolerable now, but I know in time they will fade back to the orange they were bleached to... not to mention the unhighlighted parts of my hair are close to black. I called my stylist and told her the horror story. She said in two weeks when I come home she will fix it. More and more, though, I doubt anything can be done. I regret every bad decision I made. I really think I'm just going to suck it up and let it grow out. It will probably take a year to get it to cute bob length with my natural color... but**** (excuse my french). What are ya gonna do?

Right now I feel bad for my boyfriend... I used to be beautiful, his little princess. We've been together for three years, and I know he loves me more than anything, but I feel like I look like such ****, and I'd be embarrassed to walk around with me. Esspecially considering I'm going to look worse and worse as it grows out and fades. I've told him I wanted to break up to spare him. I want to go somewhere and hide until I look like me again. He won't hear of it. But I'm miserable. I ache, and my self-esteem and self worth are negatively off the charts. So many mistakes.

Thanks for letting me vent.

By the way, I use Redken CAT, and have been for like 6 months... maybe that's why it has proven resilient.

I wouldn't put any more chemicals on it, if I were you. Just leave it alone, let it go back natural, and start over from scratch. The more chemicals you put on it, the more damaged it'll get, and consequently, the worse it'll look. *nods* At one point my hair was so dry and damaged I used intensive-blend shampoo and three or four conditioners every day, and it still frizzed constantly until I finally cut it. I try to be more careful with what I do with my hair now.