too white blonde

ok - so i posted a few weeks ago - i had gone from dark brown to blonde - unfortunately, i got a terrible yellow - so, i waited a few weeks and last week went to salon and they suggested a darker base with a few highlights - to me it was very dull - so yesterday, because i couldn't stand it anymore, went to a different salon and she said they had given me "lazy" highlights - they were very stripey, etc - so she said she would put more blonde in all over - i said i didn't want too blonde, or unnatural blonde, etc - she said ok.  so i pictured sort of a sun kissed blonde that would flow into my other exitsing highlights - i got done, adn while it is better, it is way too white looking - so, because naturally i am a dirty blonde, to me i think it looks like black on white, and gives that false gray impression slightly - UUGGHHH - being a dark brunette was so much easier

so she said it was a bit much, etc - and that i shoudl come in in a few days and she would put a few different ones in - will this work? 

i remember when years ago i started highlighting - it seemed so easy, they would just put in a few highlights (and the mixture was a blue color that was going in - what exactly was that because i want it again?)

also - i think i'm learning i don't like highlights so much because i hate the million colors it looks like i have in my head - i think there's some of new process out there where the highlights are painted on but not from the roots - is that correct?  i love that look because i hate that stripey look when you pull your hair back....(guselle bunchen i think has that?)

sorry for writing so much - don't want my hair  to fall out - but after almost $500!!  i would want to like it - any suggestions if what i said above will work (the few more highlights - can it tone down white looking ones) and also, the newer highlighting process, and finally when the formula is blue, what color does that give?

thanks a million!