Long hair problems...

Hi . I have long (about elbow length) dark curly hair. I don't really mind the curls when my hair is wet, except when it dries it REALLY frizzes and gets extremely hard to manage. I'd love any chemical-free product (my hair gets really affected by chemicals and styling products) that would hold the curls in place so I get the wet-hair look I like all day. Gel doesn't work, no matter how much I use.
I also like straightening it sometimes but I do a horrible job of that. I have a straightening iron , so i try to blow-dry it then straighten it, but it straightens out for ten minutes and then immediately curls again. It drives me nuts, especially sine it takes me at least 2 hours to get that far. I have no clue why that happens, especially because the iron is expensive and supposedly professional.
Anyway, that's my problem. I'd love it if I can get a pro's opinion on this. I hate short hair, and I refuse to get a haircut.
Thanks for your time.