Early hair influences

For most of us here, I think it's fair to say that we think of hair as more than something that merely covers our heads. And we probably think about hair more than when we just wash it or get it trimmed.

My question: Who or what influenced how you currently think about hair?

My answer: I'm in my mid-thirties and grew up in the late 60s and early 70s when obviously long-haired "hippies" were the counter-culture, and pixie cuts were the norm for little girls. I wore a pixie as did nearly all of my friends. Maybe Walt Disney had too much influence on me {grin} but I wanted long, flowing hair like the Disney princesses. But my mom wouldn't let me grow me hair until I was older. I came to abhor short hair on women and girls.

This opinion stayed with me until recently. My preference is almost always for longer hair on women, but I have come to appreciate that some women do look better in shorter hair, and actually prefer it. Sometimes, we tend to think everyone thinks just like we do, so whenever I saw a woman with short hair, I thought she either bowed to pressure to have short hair or else had low self-esteem for not wanting to look her best (in longer hair) or else simply wasn't very feminine.

Obviously, those are rather harsh opinions, and I'm not so proud of them. However, I am pleased that I've mellowed a bit in my views! I still definitely prefer longer hair on me but don't have such a negative opinion on shorter hair.

I have a daughter with gorgeous waist-length hair. I've always let her wear her hair as she wishes (my only insistence is that it is kept clean), which has included both long and short hair. Fortunately, it looks like she's opting to keep her long hair! But, I very much want her to like her hair, no matter what the length, and to harbor no ill feeling towards the subject.

Anyway, I think that being forced to wear my hair short as a young child harvested some strong views on short hair that really weren't so healthy. I actually almost became scared of cutting my hair at all until a lot of feelings exploded one day, and I cut off several inches. It was almost like I was cutting off my fear.

I'm just curious to know if there are events or people in your lives that influenced how you currently think about the subject of hair.

I look forward to reading what you have to say!

Jennifer

Know what you mean. As a guy growing up in the 70's, I wanted long hair. My father was in the military and that meant short hair all year and buzz cuts in the summer. I was forced into my last one at 15. I hated it!

I wore my hair unfashionably long for years after that, but have finally loosened up a bit. How old were you when you got to grow your hair long?

ZW

Hi!

Oh, I very much feel for you. Long hair for guys was very much "in" in the 70s, so undoubtedly that set you apart. Ironically, today, I actually love buzzcuts on men! I just love the way men and women can compliment each other by being opposites. But I'm also a firm believer we all have the right to do what we want.

Fortunately, I was a little younger than you when I was allowed to grow my hair. I'm relying on school pictures as my memory! In fifth grade (10-11 years old), I started growing it, and it was about halfway between my chin and shoulders. Then, in sixth grade, it grew down below my shoulders. So, I wasn't terribly old when I was allowed to grow my hair, but unfortunately, it still had a lasting influence on me. Those Gawd-awful Farrah wings from the 70s? Well, at least I can say that I was never a prisoner to them! {grin} I swear every girl in my junior high had those "wings." Except me. The pixie was better than those wings! ;-)

Actually, it's very interesting how often we are perceived by our hair -- both by ourselves and by others. The article on the front page of HairBoutique was interesting. And I will admit that a woman who wears a buzzcut doesn't exactly strike me as "feminine" no matter how pretty her face is or how great of a figure she has!

I just checked out a couple of books that I'm anxious to read, "Hair (Sex-Society-Symbolism)" by Wendy Cooper and
"Big Hair (A Journey into the Transformation of Self)" by Grant mcCracken. Very generally, they're about the psychology of how we wear our hair.

For instance, in the latter book, I quote "'Volumptuous hair' is mostly about sexuality. 'Imperial hair' is mostly about social standing. The 'career coif' is mostly about professionalism. The 'shaved and shorn' look is mostly about protest. The 'pixie' look is about a certain charm and elan. The 'mature bob' is about a certain tragic or dignified retreat from fashion. Each look is a piece of our culture turned into the nature of hair."

And many of you will love this: "It's almost a law in our culture: as a woman ages, she shall cut her hair. There is a tyranny at work here. No woman told me that she liked saying goodbye to her hair -- she was cutting it because she didn't want to appear to be 'frivolous' or 'vain' or gulp, 'ageing [sic] badly'. She was not cutting her hair because she wanted to. She was cutting it because she had to."

The book really doesn't seem to be pro-long hair or pro-short hair. But it really sounds fascinating, and I'm dying to delve into it!

Jennifer

Jennifer, it may be that social pressure is responsible for my opinion or feelings with long hair, but this was not different from the social environments of other people. Born in 53 I know the hippie time very well, but it can not be responsible for my sigth of view. My love for long hair hasn't disappeared yet, so I think it has roots in my personality itself. After seeing that many peole appreciate long hairs it is easier for me to accept people with short hairs, why it seems not necessary to defend my own sight of view against all and everyone.

wolfgang