should I give up?

Good advice, Nicole Z. Your photo is evidence that you're definitely doing something right.

As for trims, I agree frequent trims are not necessary. I get a trim about once a year now. When I was a university student (totally broke) I went years without a trim and my hair always looked healthy.

hey bob can you post a pic of your wife''''s beautiful long hair.

Yay! You can do it, akasara... we're rooting for ya.

Use a sharp pair of scissors for those split-end trims. Dull scissors can actually make the situation worse. I got my Tweezerman from the hairboutique marketplace and I love 'em... and they are quite affordable. [not intending to be a pitch, just a favorable testimonial for which I was not/am not being paid].

So akasara... have we convinced you not to give up?

Snipping the individual hairs is exactly what long haired people to do keep it long without having too much damage. There's even a word for it - "dusting". So, no, it's not a disgusting habit. I probably wouldn't do it in public just because so many people can be annoyed by so many things, and you don't want to leave little snipped hairs all over someone else's place, but in the privacy of your own home, I believe it's good for your hair. You should use only scissors that are very sharp, and make sure to cut straight across the hair, not at an angle (to help prevent it splitting so soon in the future).

If you go to a salon for your trims, make sure they aren't taking too much off. Hair only grows a half an inch a month, so if you take off too much, you just lose your new growth.

If your hair is split, you need to get the splits removed because they climb up the hair, causing you to need to have even more taken off later. If you're having too much breaking right on the ends, you can still grow it long, but you will probably have to be more careful. Be careful not to do things that damage or break it more, and use some jojoba or coconut oil on the ends to keep it moisturized. (If you only use a drop or two, your hair absorbs it and it won't make it look greasy or get on your clothes...if it looks greasy, you used too much).

Conditioners with lots of silicones in them (anything that ends with "cone" in the ingredient list) can cause breakage too.

there's nothing wrong with snipping off individual split ends. i have split end problems since i use a straightener. i get a 1/2" to 1" trim about every six months too keep it from getting too raggedy at the bottom. growing your hair out takes a lot of time and a lot of patience, but in my opinion it is definitely worth it.