QuoteReplyTopic: teachers with long hair Posted: January 11 2000 at 9:36pm
> I too, consider myself a long-haired fan, and have> grown my own hair as long as it will go. I really> think it diminishes my decision to grow my hair when> people, like Mark, assume the main motivation for> growing hair is to please a man. Sure, I enjoy it when> the guys I date like my hair, but if I hated the way> it looked, or hated to care for it, I would cut it in> a minute. It's my hair, after all, not theirs.Hi Kim,In case you missed it, please read the last point (#6) within my post on this topic entitled "To all those who have been participating in this thread" I make note of it here because it seems that both you and Jena (and who knows how many other people?) have essentially agreed with my supposition regarding Mark's motivations.Hope your phone line is wired soon!Dave
Hey all. Thanks to those of you who have offered their suggestions and best wishes for graduate school. I have not been able to check these messages for awhile, due to my inability to access the internet from home (I explain my problems down there a bit), for which I apologize. So here's how my first section went:Hairstyle: down, but held back with a headband. Humid weather meant somewhat ringlet-y, but I don't mind.8:00 section: I don't think students had their eyes open enough to notice how I looked.10:00 section: Students terrified, but of the reading and writing requirements, not of me. Don't think my appearance mattered much in either case.My conclusions: my hair doesn't matter too much (I tend to avoid extremes of trendiness or punkishness---is that what I mean?) and dressing like a grown-up is too hard on the feet (well, at least when you have history on one part of campus, and Greek clear on the other side). I'll probably just stick with how I feel most comfortable (I don't wear jeans or shorts much anyway).I've enjoyed hearing about other people's experiences with teaching, and teachers/T.A.s. Thanks for all the feedback!Kim
I too, consider myself a long-haired fan, and have grown my own hair as long as it will go. I really think it diminishes my decision to grow my hair when people, like Mark, assume the main motivation for growing hair is to please a man. Sure, I enjoy it when the guys I date like my hair, but if I hated the way it looked, or hated to care for it, I would cut it in a minute. It's my hair, after all, not theirs.By the by, in case anyone wonders why I initiated this discussion (though not actually THIS discussion---the discussion from which it sprung) then appear to have abandoned it, it wasn't on purpose. I recently moved, and my bedroom has no phone jack yet, so I can't access the internet at home! (And here I thought I wasn't a geek yet!) So if my participation is somewhat sporadic for awhile, please have patience.Take care.Kim
> Deana,> Your expression of humility is charming. I readily> forgive you your transgression. Keep your chin up and> smile!> DaveThank you, and smile, I will.
> Dave,> I read your posts again. I did unfairly put you> together with bb who said that his wife's haircut was> a significant factor leading to their divorce. I did> put words into your mouth, and I resent when that> happens to me. I humbly apologize.Jena,I accept your apology. Thank you.> Keen eye!! I sincerely am growing my hair yet when I> read how I *should* have long hair to> "please" my man, it almost does give me the> urge to cut it! {grin}So my supposition seems to have some merit... I sensed that you weren't the only lady who was starting to feel "fed up" with Mark's strongly-stated POV.Dave
BB,I'm sorry to have put you off. You seem to be a good man. I was trying to emphasize to Jena that she ascribed your words to me (and as we know, your words were wildly twisted). Doesn't permit me to be careless in my response to her, though. So, once again, I'm sorry.Dave
> I don't get many, so it really bothered me to see you> get hit with all this.> I feel somewhat responsible for this unleashing,> because I said (or posted) something without knowing> all the facts. I do this over and over and seem to> never learn. Until I move out of my "Glass> House", I'll try to keep the stones in the> closet. I guess I do not deserve your compliments.Deana,Your expression of humility is charming. I readily forgive you your transgression. Keep your chin up and smile!Dave
> Hi there. I was wondering if there were people out> there who teach and happen to have longer than average> hair. I am starting a new job as a teaching assistant,> which I have never done before. They suggest we dress> a step above the students in order to look> professional, which I have no problem with, but I am a> little anxious about my hairstyle. I think a bun may> seem either matronly or like I'm trying too hard, but> I'm not so sure I should have my hair waving down my> back, either. I want to look sort of authoritative> without being school-marmish (I am a grad student,> they are freshmen; I'm about ten years older than they> are, but look pretty young). Is there anyone out there> in a similar position with some advice? Thanks in> advance.> KimJust some very quick thoughts on the original purpose of this thread:1) Kim, being in college, you have a TREMENDOUS amount of leeway, especially if you are a TA. I remember having male TAs that looked like they had awakened in the car that they had been sleeping in for the last month and stumbled directly from there into class.Given that, A nice wardrobe with neat hair will most likely be more than a cut above the students anyway. Don't cut it unless you really want to.2) If it helps, one of the teachers that I'll always remember was my 5th grade teacher, Miss Stuart. Blue eyes, waist-length black hair. Think Lynda Carter in her "Wonder Woman" days. One of the more entertaining scenes during the year was when the school nurse did a lice check (they did them every year back then for some reason) and she did Miss Stuart as well. By the end, she looked like a brunette Cousin It. =)JFRelated Link:JerkyFlea's Celebrity Hair Spray
3 pm is simultaneously too late and too early to start anything.
> Hi there. I was wondering if there were people out> there who teach and happen to have longer than average> hair. I am starting a new job as a teaching assistant,> which I have never done before. They suggest we dress> a step above the students in order to look> professional, which I have no problem with, but I am a> little anxious about my hairstyle. I think a bun may> seem either matronly or like I'm trying too hard, but> I'm not so sure I should have my hair waving down my> back, either. I want to look sort of authoritative> without being school-marmish (I am a grad student,> they are freshmen; I'm about ten years older than they> are, but look pretty young). Is there anyone out there> in a similar position with some advice? Thanks in> advance.> KimJust some very quick thoughts on the original purpose of this thread:1) Kim, being in college, you have a TREMENDOUS amount of leeway, especially if you are a TA. I remember having male TAs that looked like they had awakened in the car that they had been sleeping in for the last month and stumbled directly from there into class.Given that, A nice wardrobe with neat hair will most likely be more than a cut above the students anyway. Don't cut it unless you really want to.2) If it helps, one of the teaches that I'll always remember was my 5th grade teacher, Miss Stuart. Blue eyes, waist-length black hair. Think Lynda Carter in her "Wonder Woman" days. One of the more entertaining scenes during the year was when the school nurse did a lice check (they did them every year back then for some reason) and she did Miss Stuart as well. By the end, she looked like a brunette Cousin It. =)JFRelated Link:JerkyFlea's Celebrity Hair Spray
3 pm is simultaneously too late and too early to start anything.
>For the record Jena JerkyFlea never proved that point. He>tried to use examples that weren't well represented at>times and those participants corrected and challenge him.Nope, only challenged by Lady Godiva/Jennifer Eve (not sure I understand the dichotomy there) and I think her counter-argument was weak. I stand by what I said...and fully expect her to respond nastily to this since I probably won't post it on her thread.> JerkyFlea was totally off base and where is he now?Wow, but most of this discussion is proving my point.And, it being Labor Day weekend in the US while this discussion was taking place, I, like most folks, was on vacation.JFRelated Link:JerkyFlea's Celebrity Hair Spray
3 pm is simultaneously too late and too early to start anything.
> bb I know what you were trying to say. Don't worry> about it . It is no big deal. Sometimes it gets a bit> hairy around here. (Diane)Thanks, again, Diane!!It's a good thing that we have a referee here, and a bell!!, to put me back in my corner of the ring once in a while.bb
>> haircut!! And I agree with many of those who commented> that I should be looking for the person, not the> hair!! COME ON!!!!! If I was just looking for the HAIR> I could just go out and buy a blow-up doll and put a> wig on her!!!!!bb I know what you were trying to say. Don't worry about it . It is no big deal. Sometimes it gets a bit hairy around here. (Diane)>
> Dave,> I read your posts again. I did unfairly put you> together with bb who said that his wife's haircut was> a significant factor leading to their divorce. I did> put words into your mouth, and I resent when that> happens to me. I humbly apologize.> Keen eye!! I sincerely am growing my hair yet when I> read how I *should* have long hair to> "please" my man, it almost does give me the> urge to cut it! {grin} However don't worry, I haven't> touched it and will not until my next 1/8" -> 1/4" trim. ;Hey Jena!!!!!!!!!!!Put the stones down!! Read my re-post to Dave's last comment and quit putting me into the nutso category. I have feelings and opinions like every other person who posts on this board. AND I am open-minded enough to AT LEAST CONSIDER OTHER PEOPLE'S OPINIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Put the stones down, or start covering all the glass in YOUR house. I have had it with your put-downs and categorizations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!bb
> 3) Deana, thank you for your kind words re: my> compliments to the> ladies on the board. It's nice to know that you> appreciate them.I don't get many, so it really bothered me to see you get hit with all this.> 4) Jena and Deana, for what it's worth, it may> interest you to know> that my ex-wife's hair was short-to-medium length for> the 12 years> that we were dating/married. Her not having long hair> did not> preclude me from being in love with her, neither was> it a factor> in our breakup!I feel somewhat responsible for this unleashing, because I said (or posted) something without knowing all the facts. I do this over and over and seem to never learn. Until I move out of my "Glass House", I'll try to keep the stones in the closet. I guess I do not deserve your compliments.
Dave,I read your posts again. I did unfairly put you together with bb who said that his wife's haircut was a significant factor leading to their divorce. I did put words into your mouth, and I resent when that happens to me. I humbly apologize.>Given Mark's thinly-veiled preference> for very> short hair, might Mark's statements that women> *should* wear> long hair be intentionally extreme so as to irritate> some of> the women and dissuade them from wanting or having> long hair?Keen eye!! I sincerely am growing my hair yet when I read how I *should* have long hair to "please" my man, it almost does give me the urge to cut it! {grin} However don't worry, I haven't touched it and will not until my next 1/8" - 1/4" trim. ;-)
> Where to begin...> 1) Erika, I agree 100% with what you said>> (http://www.hairboutique.com/hairpolitics.pl?read=2194),> which was:> 2) Thank you, Jade, for your kind words:> Jena's reply:> (http://www.hairboutique.com/hairpolitics.pl?read=2190)> Jena, I am at a loss to understand where you> fabricated your ideas> about my supposed dating style and my supposed basisHey Dave!!!!!!WHAT caregory is it that I am IN?????? This whole board has become nutso!!!! YES, I do prefer and love LONG HAIR on women, but I am certainly not shallow enough to base the entire relationship on her hair. YES, I did say that my marriage broke up, but it certainly wasn't solely because of her unexpected haircut!! And I agree with many of those who commented that I should be looking for the person, not the hair!! COME ON!!!!! If I was just looking for the HAIR I could just go out and buy a blow-up doll and put a wig on her!!!!!I've had it with this thread!!!!!!!!! Let's get back to some sanity here!! As you all know by now, yes, I prefer long hair. But it is not an obsession, and I am not different enough from any of you to be placed in some kind of CATEGORY!!!! WE ALL HAVE and are entitled to our opinions. I think, especially in the USA,(no offense to other nations) THAT IS what POLITICS are all about, our freedom to express our opionions. Also, hopefully, our open-mindedness to at least consider another's viewpoint!!!Thanks.bb> of evaluation> of a person's worth. Please do not put words into my> mouth which> I have not stated, and which are inconsistent with my> point of view.> I feel that you have erroneously put me in the same> category as BB.> 3) Deana, thank you for your kind words re: my> compliments to the> ladies on the board. It's nice to know that you> appreciate them.> 4) Jena and Deana, for what it's worth, it may> interest you to know> that my ex-wife's hair was short-to-medium length for> the 12 years> that we were dating/married. Her not having long hair> did not> preclude me from being in love with her, neither was> it a factor> in our breakup!> 5) Jena said:> Zorak's response:> Zorak -- the same question I ask of Jena applies to> you also...> Who are you to be my spokesman? I can speak for myself> well> enough, so "no thanks" to you for> mis-speaking on my behalf.> That you think you can sum up my feelings on the> subject, and> say so in a very derogatory manner toward my> character, seems> to be rather presumptuous of you.> Zorak also said:> I fail to understand the association you draw between> mental well-being and frequent hairstyle changes...> Zorak also said:> Wouldn't it also be fair for someone to say that> "some around> here are far too obsessed with *change* and need to> re-examine> their state of mind?"> Zorak also said:> "Normal" in the sense of> "customary?" Yes. "Normal" from> a mental health standpoint? Pure conjecture on your> part.> Zorak also said:> How's the self-examination going, Zorak? And what> exactly is> this "group think mentality?" It's a shame> that you are unable> to discern each person's unique perspective here.> 6) Last, but not least, is a commentary, based on> observation> of Mark's posts. Mark began participating on these> boards> using various names, including Mark, Jack, and Bald> Woman,> variously advocating headshaving and/or very short> haircuts,> and later, long hair. Lately, Mark has been expressing> strong> opinions that women *should* wear long hair, which> quite> understandably has begun to irritate some of the women> on> this board. But then, he seems to have had a reversal.> In his latest post, Mark said to Jena:> I ask -- is this what you would expect to hear from> someone> who has been strongly advocating long hair? The real> question,> though is this: Given Mark's thinly-veiled preference> for very> short hair, might Mark's statements that women> *should* wear> long hair be intentionally extreme so as to irritate> some of> the women and dissuade them from wanting or having> long hair?> Dave
I said:> Hair is hair. It is often beautiful giftwrap, but if> you wrap your kitchen trash up in a beautiful box, it> doesn't change the contents inside.You responded:> It is taking a considerable amount of mental effort on> my part not to be severely offended by that remark.It was a general comment, not directly at you personally or anyone else. I think this is part of the problem. Many here seem to be so ultra-sensitive that nothing can ever really be discussed without having someone taking comments personally or becoming offended by another view. I made the comment based on the impression (and perhaps I was wrong) that some men looked first at the outside package, and if the hair length didn't meet their specificiations, the inside of the package was never opened. A diamond ring can easily be thrown inside a Cracker Jack box....I did not mean to offend, but rather to point out that with the information given, that many seemed to limit their choices based on hair length, and to me, that seems a bit superficial. However, after reading Dave's comments, I do believe I unfairly lumped him together with bb, who did in fact say that his wife's haircut was a "significant" factor in their divorce.
Erika
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