Hopeless hair

Hi ladies. Let me first just mention how grateful and appreciative I am that all of you ladies take the time to dispense your hair advice and experiences on this message board. I have been reading many of them for months now (since I have been transitioning from relaxer to natural) and have really felt relief to know I am not alone in my struggles in trying to achieve a healthy head of hair. But I have to say that at this point in the process (6 months since the last relaxer), I am losing hope. I want to give a synopsis of my hair downfall, so I'll try to be brief. After about a month or so since the transition, my hair started to break badly (especially the edges). My hair was so damaged, my hairdresser had to cut it really short. Now I have to not only contend with trying to manage short hair, but also to try and hide my thinning edges. I have to say it is very depressing to say the least. I hate going in public. But I still have to work, so I can't become a complete hermit. I have tried WGO, ORS temple balm, scalp massage, weekly washings and conditionings, hair vitamins, protein drinks, carrot juice, etc. Even after all of this effort, I am seeing very little growth. I'm trying so hard to be positive and patient, but everytime I look in the mirror, I can't help but tear up looking at this mess on my head. I have 4a/4b type hair. If anyone out there could give me some specific advice, I would be so grateful.

Thanks for your support

I know how it feels to have hopeless hair because I was once ther myself. Now, I didn't try to grow my hair out natural (I have 4a/b also), but there was a time a few years ago when I didn't get a relaxer for about 9 months. Needless to say, my hair suffered tremendously!! It was alittle past my shoulders, but my hair became so brittle, hard, and tearfully unmanageable that I almost passed out! I cried and I hated to go out because I couldn't do anything with it. When I washed it, I could hardly pull a comb through it. My was alittle passed my shoulders but had broken off raggedly so that I had a HUGE chunk missing on one side and thinness in another. It was BAD.

I didn't have the money to go to the salon so I began doing research and caring for my hair on my own. Now, what worked for me may not work for you, but I recommend you give it a shot. I first switched my regimen. I switched from Suave to Creme of Nature detangling shampoo which gives your hair alot of slip. For conditioning, I used Organics Mayo Conditioner which is good for protein and moisture. My other staple products were Carrot Creme and Carrot oil, which I used both daily. (Carrot oil is also good to massage the scalp because it is a light oil but its also very healing.) I got on a good multivitamin also, not just a hair vitamin. I increased my water and gradually stopped eating red meats and alot of fried foods. I began to see a REALLY big difference. However when I had the money, I went to the salon and had the damaged sections cut so I could really start anew. I cried as she chopped---my hair had to be cut in a bob, 1 inch long in the back, about 3 everywhere else. I was devastated, but I kepted up my regimen afterwards adding a few products here and there like Nexxus Humectress Conditioner, Mane and Tail Conditoner, and I stopped brushing my hair (except for styling purposes.)

I've kept that up and now my hair has grown past my shoulders. It's thicker, healthier, and it is more moisturized. Believe me, it can be a painful process, but stay on this site and listen to some of the advice, you'll have healthy flowing hair in no time!!

Thanks so much Nymphe and Honeydoo for taking the time to respond to my post. I think the most important thing I do need is PATIENCE. I will try your suggestions and keep you posted.


God Bless

daily condition washes really help me out a lot. In the beginning when my hair was much shorter, i would rinse with water and then apply parnevue's leave-in conditioner(the purple one) and go. Now i rinse with water and apply any aussie conditioner, rinse and go. I use tallow, cocoa butter, mango butter, avocado butter and sal butter as moisturizers. I do the baggie method at nite. I take my vitamins regularly, drink plenty of water and go. My hair is lovin it. also i found out that burt's bees avocado butter pre-shampoo treatment works great for me as well.

Please correct me if Iam wrong but I think the baggie method is when you wear a plastic shower cap after you have conditioned and moisturized your hair at night.

If this is the baggie method does this not sufficate your hair or make your scalp itchy due to the lack of oxygen?

i use the baggie method when i deep condition and also at nite after moisturizing my hair and ends. the idea is to use your body heat/sweat to aid in moisturizing and retaining moisture/preventing split ends and breakage. no i do not suffocate and it does not cause me to have an itchy scalp because i moisturize my scalp as well. Hope this helps. You can also use a baggie on your ponytail and place a phonypony on top.

Thanks for clearing that up for me. I wasn't sure how it was done. I might give it a try because my hair usually hits an inch below my shoulders and stops. I think it's because of rubbing against my clothes.