Damaged hair?

Hey im new here, and i just need a little help :)

ive been coloring my hair for around 3 and a half years now, ive dyed it a few times but i usually just get blonde highlights. My hair is pretty much all blonde right now.

how can i tell if my hair is damaged? i mean, my hairdresser said its fine and my hair FEELS soft but i dont think that means its healthy. I had sort of thick hair before and now sometimes i feel like its thinned out a LOT. i dont blow dry my hair that much, i flat iron it which i know isnt good for it but i dont do it that often and when i dont flat iron it i use curling gel to scrunch it. I dont shampoo my hair every day either. I use deep conditioners etc but idk whats wrong, i was just in the shower and i combed conditioner through my hair and when i got out of the shower there was a huge clump of hair there that had fallen out. it made me nervous. i love my hair and i want it too look and feel good and i dont want it to be thin. i dont want to stop coloring my hair because i love the blonde and it looks so much better on me than my natural brown color.

any help? if anyone knows some good deep conditioners or leave-ins i should use that'd be great too

<3 hayley

what kind of tradeoff?

i looked for jojoba oil but the place i went to had nothing and i didnt know where else to find it.

i usually use a pantene intensive conditioner for my hair and it seems to work well but i heard its bad for it

thanks! :)

actually i went to my hairdresser yesterday and told her the problem and we agreed that first i need a trim more than anything, and then she gave me biosilk shampoo and conditioner along with the smoothing serum i use.

she yelled at me when i told her i used pantene, lol.

i just use it cuz it makes my hair feel softer. when its straightend.

i was looking on the ingrediants for biosilk and the shampoo and coniditioner still have silicones...is that bad for my hair? or is it only pantene

sorry to ask so many questions, by the way

Hey sweetie

... WOW... I just went and took a gander at Biosilk Conditioner's ingredients. They're very heavy on the 'cones. There's proper and improper ways to use silicones, and proper use includes

(a) clarifying rinses (with apple cider vinegar, for example. The smell goes away after your hair dries)

(b) having healthy hair to begin with (like eKatherine's - so purdy).

The Biosilk shampoo, however, looks like a nice gentle product.

Anais

Hay,

i know it's been a long time since you last posted on this topic but...i just found the forum and read through today.

i went blonde as well just about a month ago, thought it looked great, however...i could never match the blonde when i went to do the roots. i ended up re-dying it blonde (bleaching) about 4 or 5 times with in 2 weeks, with in that time i was also coloring after each bleaching. I finaly decided it was going to be way too much to keep blonde and died it back brown at the end of the two weeks. Now, any hair dresser would tell you that on paper, all my hair should have broken off at the root! i have to tell you that i went into a beauty salon last week and the girl couldn't see (from about 1ft away) anything wrong with my hair. The reasons.... i shampoo about once maybe twice a week. I don't use pantene (yes she said it was bad and leaves the hair shaft open. She also said they would not gaurentee a coloring if you use pantene). I also condition in the shower with conditioners that say they are for very damaged hair (some of the products i use are for "black persons hair. always have even before the bleaching) and then follow up with a leave in conditioner with placenta (it gives the softness and shine). If i am going to flat iron the next day or later that day...i air dry my hair the night before (not blow dry). My friends all want to know how my hair can go through so much and still be so good looking. I did have to cut about 1inch off the ends....they could not be saved! just thought i would let you know what i do that works for me.