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taylor rose View Drop Down
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    Posted: July 02 2003 at 11:40pm
hi
i'm so mad and hurt! i found this real cute jacket for 5 dollars. infact this clothing store i found is everything is 5 dollars! i found this cute pink cotton jacket. [like a jean jacket] even though it is hot the jacket is light weight. also i could keep it when it gets cooler. i asked my husband. he said no at first. then said if i shared it with my stepdaughter he would get it! i was floored! my stepdaughter is only 8. he wants me to share my clothes with her! i'm tiny i'm still a lot bigger than her! she only wears a 6x i'm a 1 or 3 in womens! he thinks i have to many clothes. i do have a lot. thats not the point! plus she doesn't take care of clothes. you should see what i go through to try to get them clean. i'm his wife not another daughter!! i tried to tell him they won't fit her. he won't listen. he saids all she needs is a belt. i'm just shocked! i got mad he called me a selfish b@tch! i have shared my clothes with my cousins growing up. what do you guys think?
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uzma View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote uzma Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 03 2003 at 1:32pm
Hi

I don't think it is appropriate for an adult woman to share her clothes with anyone....certainly not an 8 year old.

I think your hubby may have been in a bad mood, or tired of shopping or strapped for cash....or all 3 of those things, when he said what he did.

If he was none of the above, than certainly start dressing your 8 year old in all your clothes from now on, especially when then 3 of you go out somewhere special as a family .
Your husband should get a clear message...you won't have to say a word.....

Take care,
Uzi

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3katz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 3katz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 03 2003 at 3:30pm
Hello Taylor Rose (how I love your name!)

As much as I adore my daughter, whom I carried for nine months and lovingly raised to the best of my abilities, I would and will never share my clothes with her, even though never is a very long time.

I grew up in hand-me-downs, too. If I choose to wear something secondhand now, that is up to me. I am very careful with my clothing, and as unreasonable as it may be, IMO no one will take of them as I do. I'm an adult and I will live as I choose, and that includes the right to share my property as I deem appropriate. Sometimes you have to be selfish.

I hope Uzma's right and your husband was simply having a rotten day. I sincerely hope I'm wrong in what I'm about to write. There's never a good reason for name-calling. My take on the situation is this goes a lot deeper than clothing. It's not going to get better as she gets older, if this is a typical situation. I'm not an expert in this kind of thing by a long shot, but I was the one who brought children into another marriage and I was a protective mother due to guilt of what I'd done to them, even though none of us were happy and I entered the second marriage willingly. Second husband, second best was the way it was here. The repercussions are still echoing long after they've left home.

I'm sorry if I upset &/or offended you, or misunderstand your situation. I hope I'm wrong about what's going on there, but it sounds all too familiar. Please take care of yourself, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart, even though we've never met. If you want to PM me just to talk, let me know 'cause I gotta get that set up. (Don't know why I don't already!)

Jean
3katz
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taylor rose View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote taylor rose Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 03 2003 at 4:50pm
oh no no! you didn't offend me at all. i don't really know what the problem is. HE wanted to go in the store. HE just got paid.
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3katz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 3katz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 03 2003 at 6:57pm
I'm so relieved that I didn't hurt your feelings. Ah, married life!
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SuperGrover View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SuperGrover Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 03 2003 at 11:10pm
Taylor Rose *hugs* Men don't understand about clothes.
It's not about whether or not you need them or how many you already have at home. It's about how wearing something new can make you feel. :) Especially if it's a $5 bargain!

But I agree with Uzma. You shouldn't have to share clothes with an 8 year old. Sounds like your hubby was the one acting childish to me. $5 is nothing. A lunch at Wendy's costs that much.
"Hair is a part of you. It is not a part of me, because I am a frog." - Kermit the Frog on Sesame Street1b/N/ii ~ ??"/27"/32"
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