QuoteReplyTopic: Just an Opinion Posted: July 13 2002 at 11:35am
Hi. This is my first time in this forum and I`m learning a great deal from what I`ve read, but it seems like their are a lot of African American women who really aren`t happy with who they are. I mean, don`t misquote me here, it`s important to take care of what God has blessed you with (meaning your hair), but I think sometimes we place too much of a priority on long hair. Who do you think gave us the mindset that longer is better? Europeans did way back in the days of slavery. It seems to me that we should try and end that cycle and start being happy with what we have. I was blessed with extremely long hair up until my first perm at age 13. My hair went from waistlength to neck length at one point. I was severely depressed for a long time thinking about how my hair used to be. But then I realized that God had bigger plans for me outside of pouting over my hair. So I moved on with my life. I learned to be happy with the person God made me to be, in his own image. My hair is now recupperating. It is natural and I have developed an easy way to take care of it. I wash it using Luster`s Shampoo and Conditioner, I sometimes deep condition my hair or use a hot oil treatment, I comb my hair in sections and spray a leave in conditioner in it. If I want to wear my hair naturally, I use Paul Mitchell holding gel (medium) mixed with water and VO5 curl refiner and run it through my hair after oiling my scalp with a petroleum based oil. I don`t care what people say, black hair needs to be oiled. Down here is the south, lite oils make no difference, especially with summer humidity. My curls will stay for a week and if I want to redifine them, all I have to do is wet them in the shower, re-apply my products, and sit dry under a diffuser. If I want it flatironed, that`s no problem either. I just wrap it and wear a silk scarf on it. No you don`t have to go out and buy silk bedsheets as long as the scarf is completely covering your hair. It sometimes amazes me on how much money I could potentially spend on my hair that I could be doing other things with. Anyway, I do take a multi-vitamin supplement, but not for my hair. I take it for my overall well-being. I exercise three times a week, drink plenty of water (along with an occasional coke), and eat a healthy diet. God created our bodies so that if we give it the proper fuel, everything else will work fine. I`m not saying that everyone should be like me. On the contrary, you should find what works for you. All I`m saying is to put everything in the proper perspective. How long your hair is isn`t your ticket into heaven!
I agree,black women do this. They think that long hair is everything. Ive been pressing my hair for 22years of my life and it long. Its midback length. All i do is use a good shampoo and conditoner Infusium23 products, and use a good pressing creme, that dosent weigh my hair down. I use either just for me(the one with the orange top) or blue magic, because its light. I switch from time to time. I press with an electric pressing comb,i keep the heat on a low setting then when im done pressing i put it up and at night i oil my scalp and ends like ive done for years and then i put it up in a doo rag or i sleep in a satin scarf and im done. Im not trying to spend all this money on high priced products that wont make your hair grow anyfaster. I also drink lots of water and i eat well. I think just like you said as long as you properly take care of your hair it will grow. Also if you stop using those perms and relaxers,i think thats the problem,when those relaxers and things were made. Back in the day before those were thought of black people pressed their hair, and you noticed they still have some but now you see kids walking around balk headed and stuff because of the perms and stuff and them not knowing how to care for it. People need to stop worr ing about there hair and get right with tha Lord
Im fine as hell and I know this!!!! My hair is da bomb baby
No disrespect Sister, Thank You for the hair advice however please understand wanting something that is difficult for many of us to achieve is not a negative thing. We are a people of many differences, with God given creativity, please know that braids, dreads, afros, finger waves, and yes perms are all a reflection of us, and the creativity that we have been blessed with. Please understand that hair satisfaction is a multi-race thing. Non-African Americans are trying all sort of things as well, because HAIR CARE IS A MULTI- BILLLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY. It is a fact that everything does not work for everybody; my scalp produces so much sweat at night that a press is useless. This is in fact a hair web site, so people generally complain or brag about their hair. For a site a little bit deeper you might like Common Dreams.Com, it’s one of my favorites. I work for the lord 7days a wk, 24 hrs, a day, however sometimes I’m allowed to work on my hair. Yes the infomercial “European Desire” did take it a little far.
I hesitated responding to this message b/c I don`t want to sound confrontational. I come in peace (lol) but I don`t agree with all of what you have said. I definitely agree that long hair isn`t your ticket into heaven, but so many other things aren`t either. I understand your point though, that this isn`t something to obsess over (long hair); but after all it is a HAIR BOARD and people share their personal sucesses. Whether its hair growth, health, questions or concerns. Personally, I think long hair is feminine, there are a lot of races, who have long hair. So it`s not a characteristic owned soley by the european race. If we were not meant to have long hair, I`m wondering why it`s possible to grow it long. I`m sorry sista, but I don`t believe long hair makes me any less black, or any more white for that matter. It`s a personal preference, that I`m entitled to. Happy growing to you, and God Bless.
I am pleased that you are have put God in your life! However, I feel as though we all want to look good to some degree. I am use to keeping up my appearance. I do it for myself and not for others. My hair is currently shoulder length after dealing with weaves for years. Now my hair is not in bondage. I don`t think that it is a bad thing to put a relaxer, or perm, in your hair. As long as you take care of your hair before, during and after any chemical process. Some people really can`t hold a press.
Everyone is entitled to do what they wish with their hair. As long as they are happy doing it.
*Note: Check out the pictures thread below. Carmela has very beautiful hair, and not because of the length. It is the health of her hair that won me over.
My hair is apart of me; therefore, my hair will be done and on point when I walk out the door. Ladies, when my hair is down, I am down. When my hair is looking right and nice, that is when I have even more extra boost that allows me to walk with my head high. I sure if we all walked around caring less about our hair and didn`t put anytime into maintenance and well-being, we all would be walking around looking a "hot mess!!" However, I think long hair is beautiful, and will forever continue to up keep and grow my hair. Our opinions is what makes a unique.
Sorry ladies, didn`t mean to offend anyone. And in response to the reason so many of us are able to grow long hair is because of our background. If you are an African-American, no matter what you think, none of us are straight out of Africa. We`ve got relatives who are biracial and gave us a gene for long hair. Long hair is not a normal trait for Africans because of their surroundings, i.e. hot climate with sun exposure, it is not needed. We as African-Americans have adapted to our environment just as they have theirs. And I never meant to imply that having long hair makes you any less black or any more white. If that were the case, you could say I`m less of a black person because I choose not to listen to rap music. And yes, our creativity as black women is what makes us unique. Once again, I want to reiterate that your hair is just that...YOUR HAIR! Whatever you do with it is your choice. Just be careful that your hair doesn`t determine who you are, how you feel, or how well your day will progress. As long as your are neat and kempt, you`ll look fine no matter what the circumstance or style is at the moment. Those kind`ve things never change.
"I agree,black women do this. They think that long hair is everything."
I don`t agree with what your saying, not all black women think that long hair is everything. You shouldn`t be saying that about "ALL" black women. And I think that you should re-word what you say because people don`t like being pointed out as "they"
Sorry ladies, didn't mean to offend anyone. And in response to the reason so many of us are able to grow long hair is because of our background. If you are an African-American, no matter what you think, none of us are straight out of Africa. We've got relatives who are biracial and gave us a gene for long hair. Long hair is not a normal trait for Africans because of their surroundings, i.e. hot climate with sun exposure, it is not needed. We as African-Americans have adapted to our environment just as they have theirs. And I never meant to imply that having long hair makes you any less black or any more white. If that were the case, you could say I'm less of a black person because I choose not to listen to rap music. And yes, our creativity as black women is what makes us unique. Once again, I want to reiterate that your hair is just that...YOUR HAIR! Whatever you do with it is your choice. Just be careful that your hair doesn't determine who you are, how you feel, or how well your day will progress. As long as your are neat and kempt, you'll look fine no matter what the circumstance or style is at the moment. Those kind've things never change.
Ren, It is obviously clear that you have something against long-haired people! Due to comments like that, is why I slang my hair even harder. I love to walk down the street and hear other people say, "Girl, that is not her hair, that is weave." That just makes my day even more. So, stop haten` girlfriend and go with the flow!
Ren, sorry but your follow up comment is contridictory. If you acknowledge the fact that we are not %100 African, and the reason our hair can grow long is b/c we have "genes for long hair" as given to us by Europeans then why should we fight our genes. Should we just chop our hair off b/c we have African in our blood as well. I am not African, nor am I European. If my hair is going to grow long I`m going to allow it to. It`s like cutting off your nose to spite your face. And Africans can grow long hair? What about Jamaicans and their dreads that sometimes surpass even the length of some Europeans. My dear, you haven`t done your research, all races are capable of hair growth. I understand your point that this is nothing to obsess over, and with that point I agree, but please drop the whole "racial/cultural/black/white" issue, it`s irrelevant.
sound a little colder than if heard from one`s month.
We have so much more that we should be doing,
but you simply cannot go against the grain. You
have to find people who feel like you do, then learn
& lift one another. Not people who do not see
your reasoning and try to convince them. Your
wasting your time. If you would like to know of
some important non-destructive stuff that we as black women are doing E-Mail me. For Example "The Black Women’s Forum" have began helping the Mitchell Crooks guy, set up a legal defense fund. Shaperry@hotmail.com
First of all, I have nothing against long hair. My hair is currently almost back to my childhood length, an inch below the bottom of my shoulder blade. Secondly, I did do my research and that`s the only reason I wrote what I wrote. The West Indies, i.e., Jamaica, Dominican Republic, Haiti, Puerto Rico, and Cuba, were the first stop in the infamous Triangular Slave Trade. In fact, this was the original home of slavery, but natives were used instead of Africans. When the African raced was introduced, a unique blend of Africans, natives, and Europeans evolved into the culture we know of today. Thus, the ability to grow dreadlocks. Every race has the ability to grow long hair, ours was just enhanced through the intricacies of slavery. I`m not trying to convince anyone that my way is right. I just felt I should pontificate on my comments before I remove myself from this forum for the last time. I respect and thank you all for your opinions and insight. I realize that this forum is not what I thought it was and is not somewhere that I need to be in this point of my life. As far as I`m concerned, I`m finished with this topic (much to your relief I`m sure) and will no longer be any trouble to any of you. Once again I`m truly sorry and happy hairgrowing to all of you!
Ren, I am glad you realized that this forum was not and is not for you. I am also glad to know that you did your research. However, I have a degree, and I am not here to hear about slavery. I mean, I do not see the big deal with someone wanting to grow out and have healthy hair!!!! Good luck to you and the next forum you join.
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'Ren wrote:
