Deeeep Natural waves *pic* - Products?

Hey all!
I'm 20 years old and have struggled with my curly hair all my life.  If I wasn't so lazy, I would have probably straightened my hair all the time.  Instead, I own an iron, but I only use it maybe once a month. 
When I was younger, I had REALLY curly hair.  My nickname was Shirley Temple.  Now that I'm older, and finally started to love my curls, my texture has changed to be just a deep wave.  It's weird because it isn't all that long, but I am not sure how to style it.  It isn't like they're perfect waves because they still frizz a bit and look terrible with out any product, so I can't dry naturally.  So that you understand what I mean, here are a couple pics:
This is my hair WITH product in it.  (I believe this day I used Paul Mitchell's Define and Shape Maximum Hold Mousse)

This is my hair with NO product in it (and brushed out):

Weird, right?  lol...I don't know.  I think it's annoying.  It's really hard to do anything with this. 
When my hair is wet, it's wavy, and has ringlets in some places.  It looks like a stretched out telephone cord at times (when wet). 
However, the sides of my hair (closest to the temples) are VERY VERY deeply wavy.  The waves there almost look like i slept in braids...all the time.
It's just sort of annoying because I want EITHER curls or straight hair...not both, lol.
I've tried putting mousse or gel of all different degrees of holding power in my wet/damp hair to hold its curl when its like that, but it's too crunchy or helmet-head like.
I have even tried mousse in damp hair and then flipped my head and used a bowl-shaped diffuser.  I liked this style the best, but it was not what I was looking for.
What I was looking for was a hair product (maybe like a serum) that I could apply to my wet hair, comb through, let dry into soft curls.  No frizz, defines waves/curls, but no crunchy feeling.  Is it possible to get the definition with out the crunchiness???
Maybe what Im looking for does not exist.  Either way, I feel I am in the right place to find out.
I have tried MANY products.  Just to name a few:
Biosilk serum - didn't define at all, dried soft and healthy but just as if I would let my hair dry naturally.
Dove flexible hold with weightless moisturizers mousse - had to use a lot to get it to define, then was too crunchy.
Alterna curl balm - Was a cream, only works when you blowdry with a diffuser, didn't really hold any definition.
I'm not using cheap stuff here as you can see, but I am wondering if I'm asking for the impossible.
Maybe John Freida's no-frizz serum??  If i let it air-dry?
Please help!!
Thanks so much in advance!
PS - I have these baby-hairs (?) close to may hairline...above my ears, along my temples which curl and frizz out in all directions.  I've tried every which was to let them grow.  Is there ANYTHING i can do to calm these?  When I put my hair in a pony tail, they stick out and I have to put them behind my ears, but they usually creep out in weird half-curls.  Just wondering why they won't grow.  I look like I have a receiting hair-line or something, lol (at 20!).

Thanks!!

I will try that!  But is it the same thing as wrapping hair in a towel?  I heard that its bad to twist your hair in a towel, plus my hair NEVER dries that way.  It stays wet.  If i put my damp hair in a pony tail, it does not dry until I take it out.

Maybe because it is too thick????

When my hair is short, I have waves that look like yours! They're only in the back of my hair, not the front. It's weird and annoying. It looks like I put 3 or 4 elastices in and let it dry, you know what I mean? I didn't know I even had this 'weird' hair until I cut it short. I went from almost waist length hair to chin length. As it was growing back out, I noticed the deep waves. I never had curly hair. I always thought my hair was straight! When it's long, it's too heavy for the waves to be noticable. It's pretty thick so the weight of the hair pulls the waves almost straight. My kids, however, have VERY curly hair that can be frizzy at times. I've used a number of products on them. I've found that if I keep their hair from going frizzy, it keeps it's nice curl shape and the curls are seperated and nicely defined. I don't know if this would help you any as your hair is normally wavy, not curly. I don't know of any product to 'add' curl AND keep the frizz away. Anyway. 1 that we really like is L'Oreal Studio Line Anti-Frizz. The other one we like I can't remember the name of! It's fairly expensive (about $10.00 a bottle). It comes in a very small (about 15ml I think) purple colored bottle with a pump on top. It's only squirts a tiny amout at a time but you don't need too much, thankfully! It feels slightly oily on your palms after you rub it into your hair. It's weird but I find it keeps the frizz down so my girls' have beautifuul defined, frizz free curls all day! When I find the bottle of stuff that I can't remember the name of, I will post the name for you.