Totally baffling

Interesting topic.

Kuroneko wrote: A lot of women keep their hair long because they think that's what men are attracted to.

I'm not sure where you live or which age group you are referring to, but down South, the under 40 group is heavily weighted to long hair and has been since the 80's era.  This is the age group I see the most since we don't play country or gospel.  I would have to say the same for Hollywood as well.  We haven't toured the west coast in a year or so, but I'll bet things haven't changed. 

It seems Anne6000 brings up the same question frequently asked in these forums.  What do men really like about women and their hair?  I would say that men can be divided into three groups.  Long hair lovers, short hair lovers and "I don't care as long as they are gorgeous" lovers.  As far as beauty and sex appeal are concerned, I could care less.  I don't pay attention to polls or University studies because they are flawed from conception.  Most polls are biased and select their audience and participants based upon the desired result.  Further, men will cover their true feelings if their identity is known as they fear being labeled.  We are conditioned from early youth that long hair, large breast, hourglass figure is the only acceptable form of sexual attractiveness.  I honestly say that I see women with short hair or ultrashort hair as more confident and independent.  This does not mean that this is true for all women, just a general observation.  This attitude appeals to me due to the person I am. 

Dave is correct - most stylists are short-hair biased because shorter hairstyles provide for them (1) a better guarantee for return customers; and (2) an easier job to perform.  There are many stylists that see working and shaping longer styles simply as too much work.  (Stylist Nick on that TV show 'What Not to Wear' is exactly like this.  He can be quite excellent at shaping and improving longer hair, but he ALWAYS prefers to cut the hair instead.)

 

And shorter hair styles means less time in the styling chair for you and more turnaround time for customers for the hair stylist, which means more $$$.

 

The majority of guys I have known in my entire life prefer longer hair on women.  Anna Kournukova for example, would not have ever become an international beauty sensation had she worn her hair really short.  Healthy long hair definitely has an exotic appeal. 

 

I honestly do not know where this idea that a woman with long hair has self-esteem issues came from.  Besides, I would say the majority of fashion models and actresses these days all have longer hair.

 

And I do not think that short hair should be considered the "norm".  My impression is that I see women (and girls) with all kinds of variety in hair length.  And this is a good thing.   Freedom of choice is always better than having only one alternative.   If you look at a period – the early to mid 1950s is a great example, you will see what I mean.  Almost all women had these horribly stiff, butchered, flat, lifeless short hair styles.  Blecch! 

 

Just as it is bad to condemn people with long hair, it is bad to put down those that prefer shorter hair.  We should all have the choice and damn the stylists.  They are there, after all, to service us.  We are their customers.

 

Where you frequently see women tend to cut their hair is usually during life transitions.  Teenage girls who have had long hair all during their childhood will sometimes cut it short.  Many a new mother will cut her hair.  Often it is for convenience, but also it is because she is married and has produced off-spring, therefore she can now put less into her sexual appearance since she accomplished her goal.  (Actually and not just in regards to hair, this is something you can see happen with both spouses after marriage - less attention to physical appearance and desirability because they have successfully completed courtship and now have their mates.)  So that kind of blows the whole 'women have shorter hair to be more sexually alluring' argument out of the water.

 

To the age argument that women over a certain age should cut their hair, this is simply an old attitude that continues to cling to our culture.  And it used to be the exact opposite.  So it is entirely arbitrary. 

 

Besides, I recall an interview I saw once with Tina Turner.  She was asked how she kept looking so young and she explained it as follows.  If you are told all your life that at 40 you must cut your hair and start wearing matronly banker-wives clothes and act like a middle age women - you will look exactly like a matronly 40+ year-old woman if you should so follow suit.

 

Also given the growing popularity of hair extensions, I would say that longer hair styles remain very much in vogue.   But that brings us right back to the profit line for hair stylists.  In our fast-food culture, not many people have the patience to grow long hair.  Trends like perming, straightening, and extreme coloring* add further roadblocks to achieving long, healthy hair.  Hair extensions get around that and someone with damaged, over-processed hair (like a Paris Hilton) can magically have two feet of hair length added. 

 

Course the price tag for this is high.  I like to check out the extensions forum, because it is cool to see what kinds of hair styles they create.  But they casually talk about the costs which ranges anywhere from several hundred dollars to $4500 (in one example).  So if a stylist has the opportunity to score $4500, why would they even want to encourage longer hair growth?  And the extension process itself can be damaging, which means you are right back at the stylist forking over yet more money to fix your “problem hair”.

 

We need to cultivate our own appearances, not what Madison Avenue dictates.  If you like longer hair – go for it. 

 

*(I consider extreme coloring things like the Gwen Steffani platinum white, or the unfortunate trend with gothic black.  Both treatments are extraordinarily damaging to one's hair and the real horror stories occur when a person wants to go from black to white blond or vise-versa.   LOL, the hair color forum seems to be so frequently inundated with these kinds of screw-ups, it is a wonder they do not have a sticky devoted to just that one topic.)

Oh Anne... the subject line is "exhibit A" of the cognitive dissonance sown by your stylist...

Always bear in mind that stylists have potential conflicts of interest.  Their job, quite literally, is to convince people to part with their money (the more you part with, the better for them).  This is not intended to be an indictment of stylists in general, just a precaution that the things they tell you may have more to do with them keeping their eye on their personal "bottom line" than to do with being truthful.

The only evidentiary study I'm aware of (regarding men's preference for women's hair length) was performed at Florida State University.  Here's a link to it (go to page 4 of the PDF):

http://www.psychology.sunysb.edu/psychology/news/newsletter/newsletter5.pdf

Most (but not all) of the men I have talked with on the subject prefer long hair to short; and mostly mid-back to waist-length, or longer.  I've only known (or known of) a few men who prefer short hair on women.  There are certainly fans of short hair in the Short Hair forum, and some also participate in the Celebrities forum.

There are probably a few men who like women being defiant, but I think there are lots of men who like strong women.  There is a difference.

I don't understand your stylist's comments.  Why would men prefer women to defy traditional definitions of femininity?  Aside from their personalities, men like women that look attractive - and for most men, long hair definitely enhances a woman's appearance.

In general, I think people are more daring and self-confident when they don't feel pressured to do something they don't want to do.  If you want long hair and don't feel attractive with it short, then you will probably be more daring and self-confident with long hair.

One more thing - the notion of long hair being inappropriate for "older" people is a myth.  I know of many women who are in their 40's and beyond who have beautiful long, long hair -- and they look great.