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Bob S View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob S Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 29 2006 at 12:00pm
     Anne, fascinating discussion! As for me, I have *never* seen an improvement when a woman with gorgeous long hair cuts it. If the hair is sloppy, that's another matter. But hair length does add to femininity, IMO. I enjoy seeing a woman's facial features and neck also, and that's what makes some short cuts attractive, but hair worn up does the trick also. And..., hair that's *up*, must (or has the potential  to) come down!  
     When my wife had short hair eight years ago, she wore rouge and lipstick on occasion. *Now*, there's *really* no need. And she's 46 now! Whoever said that most men prefer short haircuts on women is lying or misinformed! You should hear some of the short-haired gals I work with talk about their complaining husbands!  Best, Bob
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phil View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote phil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 29 2006 at 2:43pm
I often wonder if a bit of "reverse psychology" is at work here. Tradition has it that women always look better with long hair. This rang true throughout the ages, and it wasn't until the 1920s A.D. (Eton Crop) that anyone even considered that a woman could style her hair any other way. Long hair came to define femininty. Which is precisely why those who take the conscious decision to fly in the face of tradition and truncate their most prized asset, are in my opinion so attractive. But if it weren't for the fact that, yes, long haired women are nicer to look at, the novelty value in cutting at off would not exist. Even now, if short-haired women are in the majority, the fact remains they have still chosen that style contrary to a popular wisdom that stood for centuries, and for that I think they should be admired.  IMO the cropped girl is the independent, free thinking, empowered one, and that is something to be encouraged.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote anne6000 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 29 2006 at 10:04pm
Originally posted by phil phil wrote:

But if it weren't for the fact that, yes, long haired women are nicer to look at
 
Since you said you are attracted to women with shorter hair I am (pleasantly) surprised at your statement.
 
 
 
Quote Even now, if short-haired women are in the majority, the fact remains they have still chosen that style contrary to a popular wisdom that stood for centuries, and for that I think they should be admired.
 
So, the key for you is an appearance that is contrary to history, regardless of today's fashions.  For the past thousand years, it was convention that women wore only dresses.  One might argue that dresses are more formal than slacks, but finding a woman wearing slacks in western society is very easy to do.  Yet, with your argument, since dresses were the feminine ideal for centuries and centuries, the woman wearing slacks today is somehow more independent, free thinking and empowered than a woman who wears a dress.   How is it admirable that a woman dresses against how women  have dressed for centuries?   That's like saying an average woman of today who is literate should be admired because she's going against the convention that for centuries, all but the wealthiest of women were not educated.  I don't see the logic of admiring a quality or behavior that is very commonplace today just because it was rare in much of history.
 
 
Quote IMO the cropped girl is the independent, free thinking, empowered one
 
By definition, independence is seen as doing your own thing, free from the influence of others. The problem with linking short hair with independence today is that short hair is very much the norm.  Therefore, cutting your hair short is just following the dictates of the majority of women and being influenced and submitting to the popular culture of short hair, quite the opposite of independence.
 
If you're following the crowd, then you're not independent. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


Edited by anne6000 - July 29 2006 at 10:20pm
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phil View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote phil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2006 at 6:50am
I see what you are saying, but fear you may have missed my point. It isn't just opposing centuries of convertion per se that I find attractive in a person.  You mentioned literacy - well of course I'd rather be with a literate, well educated woman than one who illustrated the downtrodden wrongs of yesteryear.  You gave dresses as another example - let's call it the "dresses versus tresses" debate - there is one big difference. Where a dress can be replaced at a whim, a short haircut is a statement which has to be lived with for weeks, maybe months.  Clothes fashion is a statement, sure, but can be changed at will if the appeal fades. It is the level of commitment required for short hair that I find appealing.  The more severe, the bigger the commitment and level of inependence, etc. Maybe more women do have above collar length hair these days, but there still aren't enough shorn and buzzed women around. Well, not for me, anyway.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rhpetunia Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2006 at 10:35am
My post is based on my individual opinion based on my observations.

I agree with Dave that mens' attraction to women with long hair is visceral and innate.  If an author of a novel is creating in image in the reader's mind of a gorgeous woman, is he/she more likely to say something like "She had auburn blonde hair cut to her ears, and her dress lay softly against her lovely curves" or something like "She had long, flowing auburn hair that cascaded against her lovely curves".  The second conjures the desired image much more effectively in my opinion, though in both I have made an equal effort to present the image in a positive light.

Also, people have many reasons for choosing their mates, appearance being only one factor.  One factor (out of many) is that some people may not target a mate that is "the best looking" for various reasons, and this can explain someone considering long hair to be better to look at, but still not desiring it in his/her mate. 

I staunchly believe, like Dave, that men have a visceral, innate attraction to long, healthy hair.  But in many cases I don't even think it's conscious -- they don't even think about what kind of hair they like.  I can't really ask them, either, because I obviously have long hair and the responses would be biased, or it would make them uncomfortable.  I know my husband agrees with me (y'know, "yes, dear").

For years I kept my hair a little past the shoulders and layered.  I was careless with it, and it was often in poor condition.  Late this past fall I turned over a new leaf and started taking care of it, and now it is healthy and at mid-back.  I work in a predominantly male environment, and I have noticed differences in how I am treated, and I am observing that the hair catches the eye. 

To me, it's undeniable.  Men have an innate attraction to long, healthy hair.  Not that it should change anyone's actions or preferences, but I believe it to be true.
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anne6000 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote anne6000 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2006 at 12:05pm
Originally posted by phil phil wrote:

It is the level of commitment required for short hair that I find appealing.
 
The concept of commitment doesn't fit here.  There is a dependence on frequent salon trips, but when hair is short, limited possibilities exist on what to do with it, as opposed to taking care of very long hair.   However, this isn't the same as your original argument.
 
One could accurate say that long hair requires commitment because it takes a long time to achieve.   Short hair simply requires dependence on frequent haircuts.
 
If you personally attach a label of independence on short hair, there's nothing wrong with it.  But logically, it doesn't make any sense.
 
 
 
Quote The more severe, the bigger the commitment and level of inependence, etc.
 
If a woman wants short hair, it's extremely easy to do.  A few minutes with scissors and most of her hair is gone.  However, having long hair requires the exact opposite:  commitment and patience to grow it long.   Dependence on frequent haircuts is anything but independent.
 
Being independent is going against the grain.  Short hair is being one of the crowd (step into almost any salon!). 
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob S Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2006 at 1:11pm
     Hi Phil! You *admit* that women generally look more beautiful with long locks, so apparently you prefer them *less* feminine looking, or more "independent", as you say. That's fine with me. But although most guys seem to prefer flowing hair on women, I don't think that it is difficult in Western societies for a woman to wear cropped hair. Oh, the initial reaction of a woman going long to short may be negative from some men, but by the second or third cut, there's no problem at all.
     In my view, it's the ladies who sport long locks who are the ones who have to bear the brunt of ridicule. (Not to mention guys!) Yes, my wife gets joked about regularly, mostly from family, and her hair is spectacular! Thus, *they* are the ones who need the resolve and commitment to succeed. Just one bad hair day may lead to a cut which forces short hair upon the recipient for a year, and medium length from two to three years.
     There is nothing wrong with short cuts on women, but thank God for those who enjoy the ultimate femininity of unedited tresses! Best, Bob
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Merlin101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2006 at 3:31pm

So, as I understand it, Dave Decker, Fabio and myself are ultimately feminine because we have long hair.  Or is long hair only feminine on women?  If so, thus maybe, being a woman is the ultimate femininity regardless of her hair length.  Or maybe, since all humans are capable of having long hair, if not artificially shortened by the shears, we are all feminine as we are at conception.  This topic is so intriguing.  Where will it end?  I think we should expand it to long vs short fingernails,  natural or shaven legs/armpits, flabby abs or should women work out to be prettier/sexier. 

Let's end this thread and just say everyone has a different opinion about what is prettier or sexier and that opinion may or may not be in agreement with current cultural norms.  Thank God for diversity.  Diversity is what makes it all go around.

 

I can barely conjure myself out of bed, let alone conjure up the devil.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote anne6000 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2006 at 7:23pm
Originally posted by Merlin101 Merlin101 wrote:

So, as I understand it, Dave Decker, Fabio and myself are ultimately feminine because we have long hair.
 
If you all have small waist-to-hip ratios, curvy legs, lovely rounded breasts, no Adam's apples, a higher overall fat percentage than men,  higher octave voices, and soft and sweet facial features, then probably yes.  However, I've see pictures of Dave and Fabio, and they look just as strong and masculine as Samson!    I have no reason to doubt that you join their company.
 
Obviously, this thread has driven about as straight down a focused path as Mel Gibson did last Thursday..
 
The aim was never to argue against people's preferences.  It was to question the logic behind a woman being labeled as confident and daring because she cut her hair short in the year 2006 when in fact, what she is doing is simply following the majority of the crowd.  She may not have cut her hair expressly to fit in with everyone else, but whatever her reason, she is much more the norm with the short hair.  Which......make the original argument about standing apart from the crowd -- invalid.
 
Finally, I agree wholeheartedly about diversity!
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kuroneko Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 12 2006 at 3:40am
Of course, this topic was about what men find attractive on women. . . makes me wonder what one would find if they asked what men find attractive on men, or women on women. . . although I doubt the board's got a big enough gay contingent to support such a topic.  *shrugs*
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sharyg11 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 30 2006 at 4:25pm
Wow! what an interesting thread. I never new such a topic would attrack so many people. I do have to disagree that just because Anne's stylist made the sugestion that men were more attracted to short haired women, that stylists in general do this because they want to make more money, since of course what they do is cut hair. I have never personally heard any stylist make that type of comment.
 
Personally I never had a stylist tell me such a thing. The only time my stylist told me, "you need to cut you hair", was after I had growned it really long, after a bad experience with TR. I new even before I got to the salon that she was going to say that, because eventhough I had been able to let it grow that long, it was really damaged and weakened from the TR. And even then, I said to her, "I know, but I'm not mentally prepared for it yet". She "OK, but start thinking about it, because the hair is really weak and damaged". So she didn't even insist or tried to put pressure on me, although it was evident that I needed to part with the hair. After about 2 minutes, I said, what the heck, I'm going to have to cut it eventually anyway, so go ahead. I ended up with a beautiful below the chin bob, that I ended up just loving, and everyone at work was going crazy over.
 
On another note, my stylist makes no money from me when my hair style is on the shorter side. When my hair is really long, I make alot more trips to the salon,  because is harder for me to keep it beautiful on my own. It takes forever to blow dry and style. Plus I spend more on conditioners and special treatments and all that stuff. When my hair is on the shorter side I can easily take care of it myself, and will only go see my stylist when I need a trim.
 
I also don't agree that most women have short styles. Maybe that varies by city. But here in Miami long manes are everywhere and they rule.
About men preffering long hair, I have to agree that most of them do. At least the guys I asked about, always say they love long hair. But also have to agree that if the girl has her look together, she will get attention anyhow. Weather long or short.
 
I've had both really long hair, and chin length bobs and have gotten equal attention from guys. I have an ex-boyfriend who loved short hair. Not the pixie cut type, but the layered bob type. When I was with him I had really long hair, and regarless of his liking of short bobs, he was infatuated with my long hair, and loved the attention I would get from guys when we walked into a place together. Anytime he picked me up to go out, the first thing out of his mouth when I opened the door was, "wow, your hair looks beautiful. He was always talking about how much he loved it. And this is coming from a guy that wordshiped short hair. So I think is the whole attitude that counts. A woman who appers confident and has the right cut, weather short or long will have guys looking at her. I think as long as the cut is feminine, stylish, and sexy, (and on the right woman, not all women can get away with short hair) it will work. As long as is not those sure short pixies, I personally hate them. Although I have to admit that some women can pull it off, and look absolutly gorgeous with it. I personally can't go any shorter than a chin length bob. It just doesn't suit me.
 
I cut my hair into this really nice layered bob that I actually saw on a box of hair color. I had to beat guys off with a stick (exageration of course) but I was getting so much attention I couldn't believe it. However I realized some time later, that it wasn't the fact that the hair was short, but that particular hair cut itself that made me look so good. Because I tried cutting it again, this time in a different style, although similar in length and the results weren't near as great as with the first hair cut.
 
So eventhought I believe is true that most men are attrated to long hair, at the moment of truth, is the whole emsamble that will do the trick. And for the most part, I think is the real short hair that they find unattractive.
 
And as far as women go, go with what you feel and makes you happy at the moment, and most important what looks good on you and makes you feel attractive and confident. Because when you feel that way, guys will pick up that vibe, and ultimately, that is what really attracts them.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SummerM Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 03 2006 at 10:46am
First where salons are concerned, sometimes it is about money. The woman has to go back to the salon every 6 weeks or so to keep maintaining her short hair. Sometimes its locality, in some places short hair is the trend and thats what they are doing. Sometimes it is about age- some places have a mindset the older the client the shorter the hair.
Sometimes a stylist will tell the client to cut because of others issues that have nothing to do with hair- cattiness.
 
 
 
Where men are concerned, I think that is about the indivual and also the location. In Metro areas- I think those places or more trendy/cutting edge, but I don't think its superior over other places, just a different mind set.
 
For the most part, I think men know what they like- they have their preference no matter what others think. I don't agree with this  "conditioned  business" . There are men in this thread that prove it. If all men were conditioned to think a certain way, they would all be saying the same thing- nope, each one has their own like and viewpoint.
Some men have stated their preference in women and the "conditioned preference" wasn't among their preference.
 
 
 
Now that said, I think there is a mind set with some people about long hair vs short hair.Apparently to some long hair is  "old fashioned" ( I don't even know what this means anymore) and rural. Well I don't think so, a woman in this thread talked about Florida have long haired women- they are not rural, California sports both long and short- so I don't see the *old fashioned/rural* connection here.
 
Another thing, long haired women I guess are not daring or modern. I'm 38 ,5'1 and I have long dark hair about waist/hip length, and I love punky colors. I have piercings and I'm working on a three tat design but I haven't started on them yet.
What exactly is daring/modern? Confidence isn't about how you look, its about what you can do and knowing who you are.
 
Am I against short hair- no. I have seen women that look stunning with short hair. I do have to say the big hair I have seen has been with short do's not long.
Where I am women of all ages have log and short hair, and there are alot of women here that have the short spikey hair.
 
 
 
Anne- The biker babe comment made me laugh. I look close to that except the short blonde hair and I have never been on a bike/ nor a bike rally and I live two hrs from Sturgis.
 
 
Hooters has long hair(sometimes) and big boobs ( sometimes) because the man that is the owner /operater likes it that way- period. Some of those res. may go by the personality of the town/state they live in to gain customers so making money.
 
 
Basically we are talking about going on a preconcieved idea of what "we" think is true based on our limited experience. Our outer appearance may have nothing to do with our lifestyle. Short hairs are this way/long hairs are that way- generalized which may or may not be true.
We are individuals, we think individual, there can be a million reasons why we look the way we do.
 
Last I put no credence in studies, most are slanted to favor the person that started the study. Unless started by a scientist and the study has fact- no emotions involved and involving more than a handful of people and then claiming "all men" , or"all this or that"- its skewed.


Edited by SummerM - September 03 2006 at 10:49am
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