Hair and Spirituality

Hi everyone,
My name is Julie, I am a Chinese-American woman from the San Francisco Bay area of California. what i am interested in is people`s opinions about spirtituality and hair.

For centuries people, men and women, have had religious and spiritual associations with their hair.
Thr ancient Jews believed that women should have long hair and men should wear beards. Many Ancient Native American Indian groups believed both men and women should grow their hair long. East Asian Buddhists often shaved their heads, especially the male monks and female nuns. In India, Sikh men are never supposed to cut their hair, they sometimes grow it to the ground!! In ancient Egypt men and women shaved their heads, the same is true today in parts of Africa. Viking and Germanic tribal men in northern Europe grew their hair and beards long, the northern European women sometimes wore their hair long, sometimes cut it very short. The ancient Esscences in the Middle East, both men and women wore long hair and men wore beards(Jesus was supposedly of this group according to the Dead Sea scrolls). All of these groups of people had religious ideas about hair and treated their hair with care and devotion as part of their spirituality.
Even the practice of curling hair or straightening hair had spiritual as well as fashion implications.

While it is true, hair fashions are for beauty, fun, as well as sexual and sensual appeal, many people even today feel a certain spiritual affinity with their hair and when taking care of their hair or the hair of others. Love, devotion, care, gentleness, and kindness as well as a feeling of spiritual devotion sometimes goes into hair care, looking good is only part of it!

I am 27 years old.When I was in my late teens and early twenties I had hair past my waist, and took loving care of it, I felt a spiritual devotion to it. I also loved taking care of my boyfriend`s hair, which was also long past his shoulders. But I ialso had a very strong feeling towards the love, devotion, humility, modesty and sacrifice of the Buddhist nuns who shaved their heads. I was a shy girl, deeply religious and always meditated, prayed and worked for awile at a soup kitchen and homeless shelter, I was looking for spiritual service and devotion.

After cutting my hair and wearing it in a short bob style, I recently shaved my head bald. I have a boyfriend I am planning to marry(he is not a Buddhist like me, he is a European-American Christian), and I don`t plan on being celibate like Buddhist nuns are, but in every other way I want to lead a life of devotion to God and spirituality in my Buddhist faith. My man understands this and is very supportive. I do feel sexual and sensual, my shaven head has those attributes to myself and my boyfriend, but the most profound reason why I shaved my head was a sense of spirituality, a sense of humility, modesty, submissiveness and feminine sacrifice!

Are their other men and women reading this who have had these feelings about their hair, whether their hair is past their waist, bald or any other style in between. Do you feel a sense of calm, love , gentleness and devotion when taking care of your hair, or a loved ones hair? I would love to read your replies.

May God bless you and peace, love and goodness be with you.

Sincerely and with love, Julie

WOW JULIE,
What you wrote was incredible. You seem like a really gentle, beautiful soul, and a beautiful woman! I am going to let my wife Monique know about what you wrote, she has some ideas similiar to yours, I am sure she could relate to what you wrote!
Much love beautiful Julie

Hello Julie,
I am a Christian, but I greatly appreciate Buddhism, it is a tolerant religion with a rich tradition that co-exists peacefully with other faiths.
I greatly admire you Julie for the choice you have made to lead a religious life,and live with the discipline and devotion of a Buddhist nun,(with the exception of a celibate life, as you have indicated you are intending on marrying a man).
Also you and your man are also obviously evolved people, and I think it is wonderful that a Buddhist woman and a Christian man can love each other and plan to marry. The love and compassion of the world`s great religions is the same, even if the practices of religions are slightly different. The deeper meaning of religions, hope, faith , compassion, devotion, and especially love are the most important part of Buddhism and Christianity!

The very best to you Julie in your personal and spiritual life!

I believe you refer to the Essenes, a Jewish sect active during the time of Christ. :)

I am a Christian and I believe that spirituality is entirely separate from one`s hair.

Dear Julie,

I am Johan`s wife Monique. I rarely write in to messageboards, I am not a great user of computers, but my husband brought to my attention what you wrote, and I was so deeply moved by it I just felt I needed to write you.
I, like you Julie, am a deeply religious person, my faith is Christianity, and even though I was raised a Protestant Christian, I spent years as a girl dreaming of being a Catholic nun, and devoting my life to Christ and to the service of others. I am very small and petite, and the world at times intimidated me, and I was very quiet and shy as a girl, I still am sometimes.

When I got into high school I also learned from friends something about eastern religions. Buddhism in particular appealed to me, and especially the Buddhist nuns. When I was 15 I cut my hair very short and I often dreamed of shaving my head, it seemed to me to be a sacrifice to God. The idea of a shaven headed woman also represented to me submissiveness, my desire to be exceptionally modest. While other girls wore sexy clothing I often wore long dresses, very short hair and head scarves. I did wear makeup and earrings, and I got my left nostril pierced and wore a nosestud, I have always loved jewelry, but generally I was very modest and self effacing. I had few friends, just a few artist types, and rarely went on dates with boys. People told me I was very pretty, but I was much too shy, and when boys asked me on dates when I was in high school I usually politely turned them down not because I disliked the boy, but because I was so shy I wouldn`t have known what to say or do on the date! The only boy I dated much was a guy who was an artist and musician, a handsome kid with long hair(I have always loved long hair on men), but he dated other girls too, I was really just his friend. And of course I never had sex, I wouldn`t allow it.
And always I dreamt of being a Christian nun or sometimes a Buddhist nun.

I did study hard though, my family was lower middle class and didn`t have alot of money but I got a college scholarship and attended the University of Minnesota in my hometown of Minneapolis, I majored in Art History and got my degree. After college I worked for awhile as a secretary, then for a little while at an art gallery and a coffeehouse, and eventually got a job at a jewelry store. I met Johan a few years ago we got married and now, at 29 years old I am pregnant with my first child(Johan has two daughters from a previous marriage). Johan was the first man to really love me and understand me and I am very devoted to him, he really is the love of my life, and I want to give him so much!

I first shaved my head Julie when I was twenty two, right out of college. It was something I wanted to do for years, and it was very spiritual to me, it gave me the ultra-submissive feeling I wanted, a naked skull, vunerable, smooth skin, to me it represented a type of extreme feminine sacrifice, an ultra-femininity if you will, a sense of sacrifice and modesty that is hard to explain to people. Was it also sensual, of course, smooth skin is always sensual, but I know you understand this Julie, sensuality and spirituality can sometimes be united, like when a woman gives herself to a man, loves him with all of her body, mind and soul, and ultimately both parties are physically, emotionally, and spiritually satisfied, and sometimes even a beautiful baby, life, can come from this sublime expression of combined physical lust, emotional love and spiritual connection, light in the darkness. And part of all of these feelings with me is to increase my submissiveness and therefore my femininity, and so I gladly shave my head to feel these feelings of sensuality, sexuality, spirituality and a sense of sacrifice and devotion to my beautiful loving husband and to God!

I have no idea how many women feel what I feel about submissiveness and sacrifice Julie, and how my buzzcut hair or shaved smooth head is part of this devotion, but I know that you know exactly what I am saying, you described perfectly the same sorts of feeling that I have. I have never met you Julie but I love you as a sister, I give you a kiss and a big long hug, and take care of your man who sounds as if he also understands you, as Johan does me, and most importantly, may the grace of God continue to guide you and lead you on your path to submissiveness and devotion!

All of my love to you Julie and again a kiss!

MONIQUE, I AM SO THRILLED THAT YOU WROTE IN !!!

Monique we have heard so much about you from Johan, I`m so glad you wrote in!!!
If you have been reading the threads that Johan statrted you know that I am a lifelong bald woman who has alopecia totalis and that like you Monique, I am married and pregnant with my first child, I am due late Febuary or early March, so we have that in common!

I can relate so much to what you were saying about being shy as a girl. Being bald I was terribly shy. Also your ideas about the complete unity of sensuality and spirituality in the love you and your husband Johan have together is soooo beautiful!!!!! You seem like such a gentle loving person Monique, Johan is right you are a beautiful woman!

You write very well Monique, please write again, and all of my love to you and your family!!!

I am very impressed that the many Christians who have responded to Julie`s message and her Buddhist faith have expressed tolerance and appreciation of her views, this is a very grown up attitude, and hopefull in regards to religious understanding. I am especially impressed with Ingrid`s maturity and understanding, Ingrid you are still in high school, but you have more maturity than some middle-aged people I know. Your folks must be very proud of you, as I am of my teenaged daughters!
Some people in the western predominately Christian societies might not understand Julie, and how she feels about things, but I understand you very well Julie. My wife Monique who wrote into this thread has expressed how she as a Christian woman also feels a deep kinship with Buddhist women, especially the sacrifice and devotion of Buddhist nuns.
What my wife didn`t mention is that every three weeks she goes to her hairdresser, a woman who is a close friend of hers, and my wife has her hair shorn to less than 1/8 of an inch, then grows it for three weeks and then has it cut again. The day that my wife is getting her hair cut, she gets up very early in the morning, goes by herself into our basement family room, lights a candle and incense, places a picture of Jesus and a picture of Mary, Jesus`s mother, in front of her, puts on some soft classical music in the background, and spends several hours by herself praying and reading the Bible, and meditating on religious and spiritual things. While she is doing this no one in our house bothers her, we know she has to be alone with God. I have accidentally walked in on her before when she is meditating and praying and she is so absorbed, I have also seen her weep after praying, she is praying for those who are suffering! When she is done she goes to the beauty salon,(sometimes when I have the chance I drive her there), and then her ladyfriend shaves off her hair. Her ladyfriend also understands that this is part of my wife`s spiritual experience.
Before I met my wife I really wasn`t religious at all, I knew about work, politics, sports, rock music, business etc., I knew alot of agressive, competitive hard people, I lived fairly hard myself, and when I was younger had even gotten into some minor trouble with the law on occasion and did some time in jail( minor stuff like brawling, property damage, minor small scale drug charges, etc.), so my idea of life was work hard, fight hard and make money. I had no use for spirituality or religion.
After meeting my wife though she taught me so much about the fine arts, poetry, religion, philosophy, she had read literature, etc., and now, on occasion, I even go to church with my wife and my daughters, something I never thought I would do!
Women like you Julie, and my wife , are my heroes(or heroines), and in many ways my role models. My wife is younger than me, and I am nearly 6 feet tall, she is barely 5 feet tall, but in many ways I look up to my wife. One of my life goals is to have as much love, compassion,and understanding as my wife. I have a long ways to go but I am learning. My wife is not only my lover, but my spiritual teacher of compassion and love.
I have never met you Julie but I so appreciate what you have shared with us. My wife just about never writes on the computer but after she read what you had written her eyes were glistening with tears of joy. Even though both you Julie and my wife are with men, you are in many ways leading a spiritual life of love and devotion as much as any Christian or Buddhist nun. As I have stated I so admire women like you, you are role models!
Much love,
Johan

Hi Beautiful Bald Heidi, nice to hear from you again, and yes I really love my wife, and Julie and Monique are inspirational, for sure!

Monique and I married we live in the same house, and of course those are not are real names, The others I don`t know.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR RESPONSES!!!
I thank all of you very much, the response was even greater than I expected, and I am so pleased, as Johan mentioned ,that so many Christians seem so accepting! And yes Monique we do have a sisterhood! i don`t know how many women feel like we do, or shave their heads like we do not only as an expression of love to our men, but also as a spiritual devotion, but I am so glad you understand! Thank you so much!
Peace, love and may God be with you!