Banishing Bad Hair Days since 1997!™
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - Pressure About Gray Hair At Roots
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Events   Register Register  Login Login

Pressure About Gray Hair At Roots

 Post Reply Post Reply
Author
Joan View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Joan Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Pressure About Gray Hair At Roots
    Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
I am 46 and have dark hair. I usually cover the gray. About 6 months ago I decided to "go natural". What a mess. Recently my husband suggested that I looked better with the haircolor applied. I was crushed. Nobody wants to feel like they are getting older and it made me feel horrible.So I bent to his pressure and had the color put on my hair again. The next day at work my boss and 2 co-workers told me that they are so glad I decided to cover the gray because it makes me look "so much younger". I really did feel awful.I guess I will think long and hard before going natural again.Just wanted to vent. Thanks for the new board. Great concept.
Back to Top
Victor View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Victor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
I am very opinionated on this one. In my opinion, long grey hair looks wonderful and is best left unchanged. I've even started a small collection of people with long, grey hair (email me if you'd like copies).Yesterday I saw the movie "Playing by Heart". This may sound strange, but one of the more memorable scenes in the movie to me was a brilliant flash of a single grey hair in Madeline Stowe's head as she walked away from the camera. It was like a jewel in an otherwise ordinary head of hair.At the synagogue that my daughter's friend goes to there are two ladies with waist-length grey hair. One is light grey -- the other is dark grey. Both are stunning. I have complimented each of them on their wonderful hair, but I have yet to get up the nerve to ask them if I can photograph them.As for the other sex, have you ever notice nobody ever complains about grey on guys? Well sometimes, but usually it's considered a sign of a distinguished gentleman. I think that just like with silverback gorillas, grey hair on people is a sign of maturity and wisdom.Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but crafted by the culture we live in. What I have given you is my own opinion, bared from the cultural template. I encourage you to wear your hair as you dare (hey, pretty catchy phrase, huh?), but don't needlessly cause yourself grief over it.Related Link:The Men's Long Hair Site
Back to Top
Cheryl View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie
Avatar

Joined: November 05 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 1
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Cheryl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
> Hello.. Sorry to hear about your experience. I just turned 40 on Feb.3rd.. and have been graying for years. I colored my hair for my kids once and yes, it did make me look much younger. Even my husband joked and called me his 19 year old. But it was such a hassle. I absolutely hated being prisoner to a box. My hair grows fast and I had to color the roots every few weeks.. ick.. Plus I had a bad experience with the coloring ..which was suppose to wash out but didn't. So, I had to grow it out. It's been over a year now and the silver has grown far down enough so as not be sticking out like a sore thumb. I am glad I went through it and like Victor said.. I am daring to go natural. I must say to you that you went for 6 months and that is usually the place where the gray growing in is very noticeable. If you ever do it again.. remember after about 9-12 months of growing, it will be much different looking. Once the silver gets past your chin and on down where it's more natural looking. When you can pull it back and there is no cut off area, it looks much better. It goes through an awkward stage.. but it does soften alot once it's allowed to grow. I intend on growing mine to my knees..silver and all! Good luck and I hope you find encouragement here from others who are going gray also!! Cheers! CherylI am 46 and have dark hair. I usually cover the gray.> About 6 months ago I decided to "go> natural". What a mess. Recently my husband> suggested that I looked better with the haircolor> applied. I was crushed. Nobody wants to feel like they> are getting older and it made me feel horrible.> So I bent to his pressure and had the color put on my> hair again. The next day at work my boss and 2> co-workers told me that they are so glad I decided to> cover the gray because it makes me look "so much> younger". I really did feel awful.> I guess I will think long and hard before going> natural again.> Just wanted to vent. Thanks for the new board. Great> concept.
Back to Top
KAREN View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: May 30 2002
Location: CALIFORNIA
Status: Offline
Points: 2
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote KAREN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
This is very scary for me personally. I have tiny little "sprouts" of gray that peek out from time to time, but because my hair is so many shades of blonde...they only show if you look for them. Part of me says....just let it happen and don't worry. Part of me says....oh no, I have a business and I don't want people to think of me as "old" and therefore over the hill.The hard part is that no matter how much I want to believe it, society STILL places so much value on looks. You can see this in what has been happening with the Clinton women. They all went through these major transformations with their hair and bodies and makeup. Why, why why? Because if they look better, society judges them less harshly.So like I said, I am really torn on this one.Thanks for the topic. I just hope when my gray really starts to go crazy I have the courage to just let it be there. :-)Karen> I am very opinionated on this one. In my opinion, long> grey hair looks wonderful and is best left unchanged.> I've even started a small collection of people with> long, grey hair (email me if you'd like copies).> Yesterday I saw the movie "Playing by> Heart". This may sound strange, but one of the> more memorable scenes in the movie to me was a> brilliant flash of a single grey hair in Madeline> Stowe's head as she walked away from the camera. It> was like a jewel in an otherwise ordinary head of> hair.> At the synagogue that my daughter's friend goes to> there are two ladies with waist-length grey hair. One> is light grey -- the other is dark grey. Both are> stunning. I have complimented each of them on their> wonderful hair, but I have yet to get up the nerve to> ask them if I can photograph them.> As for the other sex, have you ever notice nobody ever> complains about grey on guys? Well sometimes, but> usually it's considered a sign of a distinguished> gentleman. I think that just like with silverback> gorillas, grey hair on people is a sign of maturity> and wisdom.> Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but crafted by> the culture we live in. What I have given you is my> own opinion, bared from the cultural template. I> encourage you to wear your hair as you dare (hey,> pretty catchy phrase, huh?), but don't needlessly> cause yourself grief over it.
TAKE CARE WITH YOUR HAIR!
Back to Top
Jade21 View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jade21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
> Hi!This is a very interesting topic. I just wanted to add that I don't think you should feel guilty that you have been swayed by societal pressure to resorting to coloring your hair to cover the gray. I think what's most important is how you feel with your hair color. Karen is definitely right that we are judged by the way we look, among other things. Being gray or not is a choice.I am in my 20's and have had a few friends who have started to go gray. It's just a matter of genetics. I know when I graduated from college, a friend of mine watched her hair go from light brown to nearly white within a year's time. Her mother and grandmother had grayed at 19 and 21, respectively. She looked rather strange with her new hair color. She colored her hair and that was that.I think Victor's comments are quite interesting. There are definitely some women that I have seen that look stunning with gray or white hair. But, I also have to say, that others have looked horrible, either because the hair was poorly conditioned or the color just didn't fit with the rest of the woman. Gray hair can be extremely coarse. I would also say that the same rules apply to men. I don't think a man is particularly erudite or distinguished because he has gray hair. Besides, there seem to be just as many men coloring and covering the gray as women.All the best,Jade21I am 46 and have dark hair. I usually cover the gray.> About 6 months ago I decided to "go> natural". What a mess. Recently my husband> suggested that I looked better with the haircolor> applied. I was crushed. Nobody wants to feel like they> are getting older and it made me feel horrible.> So I bent to his pressure and had the color put on my> hair again. The next day at work my boss and 2> co-workers told me that they are so glad I decided to> cover the gray because it makes me look "so much> younger". I really did feel awful.> I guess I will think long and hard before going> natural again.> Just wanted to vent. Thanks for the new board. Great> concept.
Back to Top
H. Taylor View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote H. Taylor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
When my blonde hair goes silver, I'm leaving it. I vowed to my hair that I would never bleach or dye it again, and it's a promise I'm keeping. Personally, I can't wait -- I think silver hair is absolutely beautiful in both men and women. My boyfriend has numerous silver strands in his dark hair, and I absolutely love the contrast! I wish society's idea of beauty was more individualistic and healthy. Gray or silver hair does not have to equal impending death, for Pete's sake!!!
Back to Top
Simone.(C) View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Simone.(C) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
>Dear Joan,I too have very dark brown hair and started to go gray when I had my Daughter at 15 through a stressful pregnacy, juggling a horrid marriage(I divorced 1 year later!!), so many people would say at hairdressing college how awful I looked and I really do as my dark hair shows every evil little gray so I coloured it & never looked back but now I do it for ME, some women I've seen with dark hair are blessed to look great like it's been highlighted that way good for them and I look plain god awful!!, I find it a bit of a chore as I'm 40% gray & do my roots every 3 WEEKS to a month but at least I feel good about myself & is'nt that all that really matters?Take Care & Do what makes YOU feel GOOD!!Simone.(C).This is a very interesting topic. I just wanted to add> that I don't think you should feel guilty that you> have been swayed by societal pressure to resorting to> coloring your hair to cover the gray. I think what's> most important is how you feel with your hair color.> Karen is definitely right that we are judged by the> way we look, among other things. Being gray or not is> a choice.> I am in my 20's and have had a few friends who have> started to go gray. It's just a matter of genetics. I> know when I graduated from college, a friend of mine> watched her hair go from light brown to nearly white> within a year's time. Her mother and grandmother had> grayed at 19 and 21, respectively. She looked rather> strange with her new hair color. She colored her hair> and that was that.> I think Victor's comments are quite interesting. There> are definitely some women that I have seen that look> stunning with gray or white hair. But, I also have to> say, that others have looked horrible, either because> the hair was poorly conditioned or the color just> didn't fit with the rest of the woman. Gray hair can> be extremely coarse. I would also say that the same> rules apply to men. I don't think a man is> particularly erudite or distinguished because he has> gray hair. Besides, there seem to be just as many men> coloring and covering the gray as women.> All the best,> Jade21> I am 46 and have dark hair. I usually cover the gray.
Back to Top
Simone.(C) View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Simone.(C) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
>Hi H. Taylor,all I can say is 'you lucky girl', to have blonde hair!!, my Sister is blonde & 42 & the gray looks like gleaming highlights, so go for it!!, wish I was'nt so dark or I'd do the same!!Simone.(C).When my blonde hair goes silver, I'm leaving it. I> vowed to my hair that I would never bleach or dye it> again, and it's a promise I'm keeping. Personally, I> can't wait -- I think silver hair is absolutely> beautiful in both men and women. My boyfriend has> numerous silver strands in his dark hair, and I> absolutely love the contrast! I wish society's idea of> beauty was more individualistic and healthy. Gray or> silver hair does not have to equal impending death,> for Pete's sake!!!
Back to Top
Cheryl View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie
Avatar

Joined: November 05 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 1
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Cheryl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
> Victor...if you ever get the nerve to photograph the 2 ladies with waist length gray hair.. send them my way!! When I first joined the TLHS email list and was expressing concerns about long gray hair.. you typed something my way. You said gray goes through an awkward stage then softens out. You were right!! Keeping that thought in my head when I went through the most awful stages of growing out my roots kept me encouraged. Plus I have a husband who is wonderful with accepting me for who I am and not expecting me to do things that do not appeal to me. Coloring my hair was an awful chore. It took 2 boxes every 2 weeks to keep the roots away. My hair is so dark that in just 7-10 days you could see a glimmer of silver along the edge. Coloring maybe for some but not for me. Especially with wanting to grow my hair to a super long length, coloring isn't conducive with that goal. Thanks for your long ago encouragement Victor..! Cher~was like a jewel in an otherwise ordinary head of> hair.> At the synagogue that my daughter's friend goes to> there are two ladies with waist-length grey hair. One> is light grey -- the other is dark grey. Both are> stunning. I have complimented each of them on their> wonderful hair, but I have yet to get up the nerve to> ask them if I can photograph them.> As for the other sex, have you ever notice nobody ever> complains about grey on guys? Well sometimes, but> usually it's considered a sign of a distinguished> gentleman. I think that just like with silverback> gorillas, grey hair on people is a sign of maturity> and wisdom.> Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but crafted by> the culture we live in. What I have given you is my> own opinion, bared from the cultural template. I> encourage you to wear your hair as you dare (hey,> pretty catchy phrase, huh?), but don't needlessly> cause yourself grief over it.
Back to Top
H. Taylor View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote H. Taylor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:38pm
> all I can say is 'you lucky girl', to have blonde> hair!!, my Sister is blonde & 42 & the gray> looks like gleaming highlights, so go for it!!, wish I> was'nt so dark or I'd do the same!!> Simone.(C).Oh, Simone, you could leave it anyway! :) I just think that silver/gray hair in any shade hair is a benefit, rather than a detriment!
Back to Top
Simone. (C) View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Simone. (C) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:40pm
H. Taylor,you know I may just give my poor hair a colour break & see how it looks , you've made me feel less paranoid!!.Thanks,Simone.(C).Oh, Simone, you could leave it anyway! :) I just think> that silver/gray hair in any shade hair is a benefit,> rather than a detriment!
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down


Copyright 1997-2021, hairboutique.com,
All Rights Reserved.
Terms of Service,
Privacy Statement,
Advertise,
Contact Us,
Press,
Disclaimer