Banishing Bad Hair Days since 1997!™
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - What should hair sites be for?
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Register Register  Login Login

What should hair sites be for?

 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <12
Author
andy View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: April 28 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 1
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote andy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Hi Dave,Ok, so we're into semantics here, but I cannot agree with this definition process. Is this definition actually claiming that if it doesn't move then it isn't pornographic? By this definition then a picture could show any vile and horrendous act on it's own and still not be pornographic. I think McKinnon/Dworkin is a better definition as it allows for static images
Back to Top
andy View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: April 28 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 1
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote andy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Hi JadeI think you've made a good point here - this is the real damage in pornography is that it stops people being viewed as people. If you portray hair (or any other part of a person's anatomy) as a sexual object then the person who 'owns' it becomes mearly an object to which it is attached. It therefore follows that any instance of the object (eg your hair) can be pawed without any sense that the person whose hair it is should be asked first. I knew a woman who liked having her hair brushed and braided, but ONLY by her friends and only with her permission. To handle intentionally a part of another person's anatomy without thier permission (unless it is part of dragging them from a burning building or some such) is always an invasion of their personal space.If we did a straw poll among the contributors to hairtalk then we would probably find out that the reasons for their individual hair choices would be complex and varied. However a number of sites create the impression that the purpose of having a given hair style or length is to gratify others (after all, that is the only context in which the site portrays it).
Back to Top
Holly View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: May 30 2003
Location: The West
Status: Offline
Points: 4
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Holly Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
> Holly,> I'm not aware of such implications or outright> statements. Can you> offer examples?I'm going to look at some-if it's the one where Diane is so defensive about, then I'll understand now that I really did hit a nerve. We'll see.> Obviously there are a great> Are there not sites that show pictures of these women?> (I believe> there are).Dave, I didn't say there wasn't. Please explain your point that you're making here. I think I know what it is, but to be sure I'd like to hear you say it, before I post anything.Thanks,Holly
Back to Top
Holly View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: May 30 2003
Location: The West
Status: Offline
Points: 4
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Holly Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
> I never came across any long hair sites that knocks> down women with short hair and that they say that> short is not attractive. YOu made it sound like some> site bash short hair women and I never heard or read> any of those thoughts.> That part I didn't appreciate that some people would> have been mislead because every site has its purpose> and it would have created some bad feelings.> I have nothing against you. IN fact I have defended> you in the past. I have no more comments.Diane,Sorry, can't ignore this post. Yes, I am sure that I have seen sites with statements/implications like this, because you haven't doesn't mean I haven't.If you're so worried about people being mislead, then why did you put words in my mouth? I would accept your apology, but you are telling people at the mailing list that I don't put up my e-mail address here at Hair Boutique. Hello? Anyone can plainly see that I do that not only here at Politics but at "Hair Talk" and even at my post to Ann's needing help to make a decision at the "Hair Personals". You're talking about ME being misleading? HMM.You have also said that I should "watch my wording" in another posting. Yet, you admittedly don't mince words by saying "you call it like you see it". So, you call it like you see it, but others have to watch their wording. Curious, to say the least. I guess I don't have to watch MY wording, I have to watch YOUR wording of what you say I say, because apparently I don't know what I've just said since it always comes out different when you quote me!You said that you are known for being honest? Interesting.Let's keep it real here. No matter how much you deny it, you have a gripe with me for the goings-on at the mailing list. You are the one who brought up the fact that you saw me on a mailing list on your earlier posting, so you got that one dragged over here, not me, so it's strange (to put it mildly) to tell me to keep things where they belong when you are the one who did it. It would be obvious to anyone who saw your confrontational postings to me at the mailing list that this is where it's all coming from.NOTE TO EVERYONE ELSE: I bet the applications are flying off the roof for people to join so they can see what's going on here :)) Either that or people are staying away because they think it's confrontational. I'M NOT SAYING IT IS, by the way. I couldn't say anyhow how it normally is there as neither my Husband nor I went to it much prior to now.If you want to stop all this, that's fine, but you are attempting to make me look as though I'm the one who is needing to make peace here. I'm not asking for another apology because they turn out to be something other than that when you attempt to. I'll happily stop posting to you on this matter if you stop as well, and also not refer to my remarks in any misleading or false way.Holly
Back to Top
Diane from Canada View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
> Diane,> Sorry, can't ignore this post. Yes, I am sure that I> have seen sites with statements/implications like> this, because you haven't doesn't mean I haven't.> If you're so worried about people being mislead, then> why did you put words in my mouth? I would accept your> apology, but you are telling people at the mailing> list that I don't put up my e-mail address here at> Hair Boutique. Hello? Anyone can plainly see that I do> that not only here at Politics but at "Hair> Talk" and even at my post to Ann's needing help> to make a decision at the "Hair Personals".> You're talking about ME being misleading? HMM.> You have also said that I should "watch my> wording" in another posting. Yet, you admittedly> don't mince words by saying "you call it like you> see it". So, you call it like you see it, but> others have to watch their wording. Curious, to say> the least. I guess I don't have to watch MY wording, I> have to watch YOUR wording of what you say I say,> because apparently I don't know what I've just said> since it always comes out different when you quote me!> You said that you are known for being honest?> Interesting.> Let's keep it real here. No matter how much you deny> it, you have a gripe with me for the goings-on at the> mailing list. You are the one who brought up the fact> that you saw me on a mailing list on your earlier> posting, so you got that one dragged over here, not> me, so it's strange (to put it mildly) to tell me to> keep things where they belong when you are the one who> did it. It would be obvious to anyone who saw your> confrontational postings to me at the mailing list> that this is where it's all coming from.> NOTE TO EVERYONE ELSE: I bet the applications are> flying off the roof for people to join so they can see> what's going on here :)) Either that or people are> staying away because they think it's confrontational.> I'M NOT SAYING IT IS, by the way. I couldn't say> anyhow how it normally is there as neither my Husband> nor I went to it much prior to now.> If you want to stop all this, that's fine, but you are> attempting to make me look as though I'm the one who> is needing to make peace here. I'm not asking for> another apology because they turn out to be something> other than that when you attempt to. I'll happily stop> posting to you on this matter if you stop as well, and> also not refer to my remarks in any misleading or> false way.> Holly
Back to Top
Diane from Canada View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Okay Holly:We are both Christians . Can we both put this aside. I am willing to do so and I have asked you on the list and on this board. I am not about to take cheap shots at you nor I will participant in mud throwing.If you really want to know what bothered me then I will tell you.I wish when you mention that certain site.....Well you use the words LONG HAIR SITE and I felt that would have mislead some people to think that you were mentioning about that site. Then you mention that something about some site finding long hair more attractive than Short hair and Dave is asking you for example of those.That is all I am was saying okay.
Back to Top
Paul View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: June 05 2001
Status: Offline
Points: 12
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Paul Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Diane,What the heck is this all about.. I don't understand you at all! I have gone back through the messages in chronological order okay!In Holly's first reply to Andy's original post she mentioned "Not that if say a long hair site..." - note the word "A" and not "THE". In the English language "A" is not a specific term it refers in the general sense to a non-particular site.In the same post she also used the phrase "What bothers me about some sites about long hair " again - not "THE" site - "SOME" sites.Now if you can come up with a better general term than "a long hair site" or "some sites about long hair" which refer in the general sense to sites about long hair without using the words "long hair" in that combination - you post it here!!Just for the record it was Tina who also posted in reply to Andy (after Holly's post) "I have visited The Long Hair Site and while it claims to not be a hair fetish site, I feel that there is a lot there that may be borderline? ". Now notice this.... Tina used the word "THE.." that is a specific reference. So do we have this clear - it was Tina and not Holly.You then posted a message to the mailing list accusing Holly of making this statement and cause aggravation there. First off, I don't know why you dragged the mailing list into this discussion and second you should have got your facts straight before accusing people of things they did not say. It was because you made these accusations in a public forum that Holly asked you for an apology.As it turns out, it was because of your ravings that bought so much attention to "THE" site.I hope it can be ended here too, but I just wanted to set the record straight once and for all. No flaming - just facts!!No more public comments will be coming from either Holly or me. If anything more is said, I just ask that anybody who has a question for Holly or me on this matter writes to us personally at our email addresses.Paul (Holly's Husband)
Back to Top
Jade21 View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jade21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
I am glad that you refuse to engage in cheap shots and mud throwing. It's time for this relay with Holly to end. Personally, I think she did deserve an apology from the tone of your posts.There was no confusion here about any bashes or insinuations about the Long Hair Site. It is lovely and enjoyable. I took Holly's statement to be comparable to what many people say about certain magazines catering to say mostly blondes or skinny people by the sheer fact of omission. Also, some people just seem to get that message whether it is intended or not.Holly has been visiting this site for quite a while and contributes here and in the Original Hair Talk. Although I do not always agree with her, I respect her opinion and applaud her well-reasoned arguments. I believe that in all her time here, I have sent her three or four e-mails. I sent her one yesterday because I was concerned about her obvious frustration and tension with the current thread. For long-time visitors, you are well aware of the discussion in Hair Talk which occured over one year ago. My posts with Diane were extensive and an area which I do not wish to revisit. Unfortunately, I believed that the tone of the discussion between Holly and Diane was becoming too similar and felt that Holly needed to be aware of the danger zone in terms of dealing with Diane. This is from my personal experience only. I have to say that since Diane's long absence, her discussions, for the most part, have been substantial and enjoyable. I was hoping that the danger zone had become the dead zone. Hair Politics is obviously a forum in which she wants to contribute and has something to say. However, Holly and others also have something to say. In that vein, I do not believe that an opinion, feeling or anything else should be taken as a personal attack or slam. I also believe that when information is misstated or not as the speaker intended, he or she has the right to correct that---for the record, so to speak. As to Holly, I would never say that she's just arguing for the sake of arguing. It seems to come straight from the heart and I admire her for voicing her opinion. She, like everyone else, is entitled to that.What I have appreciated most about our discussions in this forum is that an individual's view differed from my own to one degree or another, or he or she had a different way of looking at a particular situation. For example, Dave indicating that my train fiasco was from a general predator, rather than from a man with some hair fetish. That's an excellent take from a man. Excellent. It's like maybe the hair was just incidental. Good point:)Bye for now,Jade21> We are both Christians . Can we both put this aside. I> am willing to do so and I have asked you on the list> and on this board. I am not about to take cheap shots> at you nor I will participant in mud throwing.> If you really want to know what bothered me then I> will tell you.> I wish when you mention that certain site.....> Well you use the words LONG HAIR SITE and I felt that> would have mislead some people to think that you were> mentioning about that site. Then you mention that> something about some site finding long hair more> attractive than Short hair and Dave is asking you for> example of those.> That is all I am was saying okay.
Back to Top
Jeff & Karen View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jeff & Karen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
While Karen & I try to run this board without a heavy hand, we think that the current discussion between Diane & Holly needs to go offline.Please, if you wish to continue, do so through your private emails.Thanks,Jeff & Karen> Diane,> What the heck is this all about.. I don't understand> you at all! I have gone back through the messages in> chronological order okay!> In Holly's first reply to Andy's original post she> mentioned "Not that if say a long hair> site..." - note the word "A" and not> "THE". In the English language "A"> is not a specific term it refers in the general sense> to a non-particular site.> In the same post she also used the phrase "What> bothers me about some sites about long hair "> again - not "THE" site - "SOME"> sites.> Now if you can come up with a better general term than> "a long hair site" or "some sites about> long hair" which refer in the general sense to> sites about long hair without using the words> "long hair" in that combination - you post> it here!!> Just for the record it was Tina who also posted in> reply to Andy (after Holly's post) "I have> visited The Long Hair Site and while it claims to not> be a hair fetish site, I feel that there is a lot> there that may be borderline? ". Now notice> this.... Tina used the word "THE.." that is> a specific reference. So do we have this clear - it> was Tina and not Holly.> You then posted a message to the mailing list accusing> Holly of making this statement and cause aggravation> there. First off, I don't know why you dragged the> mailing list into this discussion and second you> should have got your facts straight before accusing> people of things they did not say. It was because you> made these accusations in a public forum that Holly> asked you for an apology.> As it turns out, it was because of your ravings that> bought so much attention to "THE" site.> I hope it can be ended here too, but I just wanted to> set the record straight once and for all. No flaming -> just facts!!> No more public comments will be coming from either> Holly or me. If anything more is said, I just ask that> anybody who has a question for Holly or me on this> matter writes to us personally at our email addresses.> Paul (Holly's Husband)
Back to Top
eric View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: July 17 2001
Status: Offline
Points: 1
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eric Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Jade 21 said it so well. So did Jeff. Please lets move on as J&K have so carefully & politely requested.I love this forum. I never post here but I am addicted to this board. Hair Boutique is one of the top joys of my life. Please lets not ruin it.Eric C.> While Karen & I try to run this board without a> heavy hand, we think that the current discussion> between Diane & Holly needs to go offline.> Please, if you wish to continue, do so through your> private emails.> Thanks,> Jeff & Karen
Back to Top
Dave View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: February 28 2001
Location: home
Status: Offline
Points: 11
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Dave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Hi Holly,>> Are there not sites that show pictures of these women? (I believe>> there are).> Please explain your> point that you're making here. I think I know what it> is, but to be sure I'd like to hear you say it, before> I post anything.My point is that there are a variety of websites that cater to any andevery preference regarding hair length and style, and other aspects ofhair.An implication you perceive may or may not be, to some extent, more amatter of what you infer. It depends on the messages stated (if any),and the context in which they are made. I know I'm speaking in verygeneral terms, so if you want to discuss specifics, sure, let's.Dave
David M Squires
Back to Top
Dave View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: February 28 2001
Location: home
Status: Offline
Points: 11
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Dave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Hi Andy,I didn't intend to get tangled up in semantics. You are right, thedefinition I proposed is too narrow. Certainly, some static images canbe described as pornographic. My point was generally to agree with you,that some of the cutting sites "trancend the acceptable and enter therealm of the sordid" (as you put it), and the dictionary's definitionof the term ("the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as toarouse a quick intense emotional reaction") seems to apply to a few.Dave
David M Squires
Back to Top
Zorak View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Zorak Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
Well, it is good to see that there actually can be a real confrontation here that is not being blamed on old Zorak.Hey folks, I had nothing to do with this one!Z.
Back to Top
Diane from Canada View Drop Down
Unregistered
Unregistered
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
> I am glad that you refuse to engage in cheap shots and> mud throwing. It's time for this relay with Holly to> end. Personally, I think she did deserve an apology> from the tone of your posts.> There was no confusion here about any bashes or> insinuations about the Long Hair Site. It is lovely> and enjoyable. I took Holly's statement to be> comparable to what many people say about certain> magazines catering to say mostly blondes or skinny> people by the sheer fact of omission. Also, some> people just seem to get that message whether it is> intended or not.> Holly has been visiting this site for quite a while> and contributes here and in the Original Hair Talk.> Although I do not always agree with her, I respect her> opinion and applaud her well-reasoned arguments. I> believe that in all her time here, I have sent her> three or four e-mails. I sent her one yesterday> because I was concerned about her obvious frustration> and tension with the current thread. For long-time> visitors, you are well aware of the discussion in Hair> Talk which occured over one year ago. My posts with> Diane were extensive and an area which I do not wish> to revisit. Unfortunately, I believed that the tone of> the discussion between Holly and Diane was becoming> too similar and felt that Holly needed to be aware of> the danger zone in terms of dealing with Diane. This> is from my personal experience only. I have to say> that since Diane's long absence, her discussions, for> the most part, have been substantial and enjoyable. I> was hoping that the danger zone had become the dead> zone. Hair Politics is obviously a forum in which she> wants to contribute and has something to say. However,> Holly and others also have something to say. In that> vein, I do not believe that an opinion, feeling or> anything else should be taken as a personal attack or> slam. I also believe that when information is> misstated or not as the speaker intended, he or she> has the right to correct that---for the record, so to> speak. As to Holly, I would never say that she's just> arguing for the sake of arguing. It seems to come> straight from the heart and I admire her for voicing> her opinion. She, like everyone else, is entitled to> that.> What I have appreciated most about our discussions in> this forum is that an individual's view differed from> my own to one degree or another, or he or she had a> different way of looking at a particular situation.> For example, Dave indicating that my train fiasco was> from a general predator, rather than from a man with> some hair fetish. That's an excellent take from a man.> Excellent. It's like maybe the hair was just> incidental. Good point:)> Bye for now,> Jade21Hello Jade21I enjoy discussion hair topics with you and the past should be left in the past . I am the first to admit I can be headstrong and I tone down and already said sorry.More more comments.
Back to Top
Clare View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: December 28 2000
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Status: Offline
Points: 10
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Clare Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:57pm
I am really tired of this, from BOTH parties involved!!Thanks again,Clare> While Karen & I try to run this board without a> heavy hand, we think that the current discussion> between Diane & Holly needs to go offline.> Please, if you wish to continue, do so through your> private emails.> Thanks,> Jeff & Karen
Clare
Back to Top
Curious View Drop Down
Junior Member
Junior Member


Joined: March 28 2003
Status: Offline
Points: 44
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Curious Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:58pm
If you were so tired of it, why were you so inclined to read it? Guess people always like to see themself put in their two cents, and be "teacher's pet" to the owners of the site.
Back to Top
Clare View Drop Down
Newbie
Newbie


Joined: December 28 2000
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Status: Offline
Points: 10
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Clare Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 8:59pm
I will gladly address this if the person who posted this will state their name. I know that we don't have a person named "Curious" on this board.Clare> If you were so tired of it, why were you so inclined> to read it? Guess people always like to see themself> put in their two cents, and be "teacher's> pet" to the owners of the site.
Clare
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <12
  Share Topic   

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down