Father Knows Best.

>"Dad, you don't like> hair on women that's down to the knees, don't you?> Dad: "Where's it starting from?"> Holly:))))Your father is a comedian Holly. I have a boyfriend that says he doesn't care about any lenght and my last husband loved Crystal Galye. I have male friends who really love very long hair and others who like short hair. The bottom part is for all of us to do what makes us feel better. Can't please everyone all the time and if we are lucky we will please some of the people some of the time.

That's funny Holly.. but seriously, back to your main thought of knowing 5 men who do not prefer long hair.. I also have some of those in my life. My dad came to visit over Father's Day weekend and I showed him some of my prints of long haired women. He thinks I am off my rocker to grow my hair very long again. Especially so since I turned the big 40 this year and I am steadily getting more silver in each new day! My oldest son does not like long hair on women, yet my youngest son is like his dad and loves it, longer the better. Then I have some who love long hair on younger gals but once you hit middle age.. you need a Lady Di look or somewhere in that style. My dad didn't try to hurt my feelings.. he was just expressing his true feelings. He told me whatever makes you happy but I think he thinks I am having a mid life crisis.. :-/ For the first time in 16 months of growing my hair back, I am having doubts, even tho my husband is totally supportive of me growing my hair, silver or not. It was cute, on Father's Day I took my husband out for ice cream at his favorite shop. It's one of those old fashioned ice cream shops that opened in our town in the 50's and is still run the same way.. a step back in time, & you have to stand in line in open air to get your ice cream. Well..it was raining and I stayed in the car. As I was watching my husband, he turned around and starting to point in another direction. Here I was scanning all the faces, trying to find someone we knew. Then I saw what he wanted me to see.. a long silver haired woman. She had almost white hair and it was below mid back.. I tried to imagine her hair knee length.. and since I have never seen such a gal, it's hard to say what it would look like. Anyway.. I thought it was cute that he cared enough to point her out. So, I sit here with my hair about 5" short of my waist line and swinging between 2 very different men in my life. I am trying to ride this wave of doubts out to make sure.. afterall, I can't get back 16 months of growth as quick as it takes to cut it. So... there's some deep thinking ahead for me.. I really want long hair again.. but the silver makes me doubt. BTW.. I don't like coloring.. been there, done that and it's not me. The silver doesn't bother me, it the length with the silver.. I just have to figure out as the silver comes in.. if long hair or a shorter style would be more appropriate for me.. Thanks for letting me ramble..a doubting Cher~Since the controversy over the long hair debate still> goes on, I really had to write this here, instead of> "Hair Bloopers":> About a month or so ago I wrote back to a woman who> called herself Ann who wanted to cut her knee length> hair (it was in the Personals section, and I wouldn't> have even known about it except that I saw somehting> about Ann's question mentioned on tlhs mailing list. I> only thought it was for macthmaking or penpals, I> didn't know questions were asked there).> Anyway, a few weeks ago I arrived in the States to> visit my family. Some time during the visit I thought> of what I said to Ann, that I knew of at least 5 men> that didn't care for hair down to the knees. I wanted> to be sure that I was right about that number, so> since one of the men I had said didn't like it> happenned to be my Dad, I set about making sure the> record was set straight: "Dad, you don't like> hair on women that's down to the knees, don't you?> Dad: "Where's it starting from?"> Holly:))))

Hello Holly.. the photos I showed to my dad were of knee length or calf length hair... I do not print off waist length as it is not my goal. I have had waist length hair(and longer) so many times in my life, and after 16 months am only a few months away from having that length again.. I had kept my hair at collarbone length for a few years after losing my length to environmental damage. This is the first time since 95 I have had lower midback length hair. I was joking about the mid life crisis.. my sister in law said the same thing to me also! as I waited til my 39th birthday to let it grow again. They had to joke with me. And today's time, the 40's are considered what is called middle age.. people used to look at the mid 30's for that as 70 was the average life span but people are living longer nowadays. My point was that I have men in my family who mean alot to me who think extra long hair is not attractive..but on the other hand I have men who think it's kewl. Within your joke is something I am dealing with right now.. my men in the family who are pro/con to my growing mane. And having silver running through my hair has always been an issue with me..I was talking about this on TLHS last year. Now that my hair is below bra strap length andthe silver is getting much longer and more abundant.. it's getting to be more of an issue. I used to color my hair and the color was semi permanent. So, last year when I found this site and TLHS, I had collarbone length hair and was just at the point of letting the silver grow back in. Back then I was dealing with shorter hair and roots (ugh) and now I have longer hair but now the silver is very noticable..gosh, I was hiding alot of gray behind that coloring!! I think mostly that with it long and silverish, I would have to "do" something with it all the time.. i.e. braid, bun etc. With a shorter style I would feel more inclined to let it loose. That's my main thought I am dealing with. I would never leave long silver hair just hanging unless my silver stays on the front and sides like its doing. If it goes all over, I would keep it done in a braid etc. My stepmom says it looks like I had it frosted with how it looks right now.. but since growing extra long hair requires more years down the road, my thoughts are running in the long term. I have very dark hair along with my silver.. almost black. My husband loves long hair but if I am not happy with what I am doing.. then he always tells me to do what makes me happy. He prefers long hair, even if it's silver.. I should say graying hair but mine is so silver, it's brilliant. So, at times I feel like a neon sign, in the sunshine especially!As for you and Dawn.. I didn't want to start any wars.. !! Please do not get me in between any of that.. I respect Dawn because she has had the patience to grow her hair extremely long.. I could have many times but once it hit leg length.. I would whack it off to mid back or waist length and start over.. If having patience is noble.. then growing ones hair for over 20 years is noble!Your little joke was funny.. I just saw an issue I am dealing with at present within it.. sorry to have put adampner on it. Both of us were discussing long hair with our father's on their special day. I am just plugging along and looking at many styles and weighing everything in the balance before taking action, if any.. One good thing comes with age.. I am not as impetuous as I used to be!! thanks for your reply. Sincerely, Cher~> Well, first I have to point out that these men just> don't like KNEE LENGTH hair, but very long hair like> to the derriere at longest is alright by most of them,> I believe. (This is my lemgth and all the longer I'll> let it grow-unless i change my mind, which I doubt).> Actually one of them (not my Father, just so you> know)doesn't like it past the middle of the back!> It's not that age is an issue for me with knee length> hair, I just don't prefer it on any age. I do believe> that no matter how old you are, if you can carry off> long hair (from shoulder length to hips)then by all> means grow it long!> You know the actress who plays the Aunt on Twister> (she also plays the Mother of Iggy on "Fried> Green Tomatoes")?> Well, she has long hair that I really think suits her.> Also, look at the Della Reese. I can't ever imagine> her with short hair. Diane Cannon, countless women> have long hair who are well past the age of 40. I have> never considered 40 to be a real older age. I don't> think, with people living so much longer nowadays,> that we can even consider 40 to be exactly middle-aged> anymore. I'm 31 so I'm not saying this as a pep-talk> for myself.> I just think we all need to take long hard look at> ourselves in the mirror, and be honest with what we> see. If we know in our hearts that we look great with> long hair, then keep it no matter what anyone else> says. Well, let me change that a little. If your> Husband (your Husband doesn't, but this is for other> people to ponder) doesn't care for it, it may be time> to sit down and have him seriously tell you why. (Or> in the case of Wives not liking it on their Husbands,> then the same goes for the Wives).> It's nice to be able to say, hey, look, I've got the> gene power/patience/determination/willpower (not to> cut it)to grow long hair. Wondeful, but if it's not> becoming to your looks overall, then what do you have> really? If to some people it's a fear that if going> short will make you look "cookie cutter" and> ordinary, I say this: that just doesn't have to be. I> have seen some outstanding short hairstyles that have> been anything but ordinary. Somtimes you have to go> the extra mile-meaning a great bold color (or> highlights) to go with it, and taking the time to> style it. My Mother has a gorgeous, young blonde> trendy cut, and no one can believe (along with her> great, smooth skin and beautiful coloring-blue eyes,> peachy white skin)that she's 65. She wears make-up> terific and let me tell you, people are inspired by> her. Instead of granny glasses, she wears young modern> glasses. Now, she doesn't dress like she's a> teen-ager, mind you. Some women do that(especially> here in France)and just end up looking silly. She does> dress in modern, trendy clothes. The point is, just> because you have short hair doesn't mean you will look> ordinary or even old. It just depends on how you style> yourself.> I'm not going to get in any arguments here on the web,> but I do want to remark about something I read by Dawn> from Raregems. She said in a post I think to JerkyFlea> something along the lines that having long hair is> noble.> I don't understand the connection. I certainly have> very long hair, but I don't think of myself as being> noble for growing it this long. I think I might have> some idea of what she means, but I certainly hope it> wasn't just for the mere fact that it was grown long.> It takes something more than that to be noble.> Do you mean, Dawn, that because you take a lot for> having hair to the knees, and that you still haven't> cut it, that this is what you mean by being noble? I> just want to be clear on what you mean.> Well, I didn't mean to go on so long, but think about> it before you cut your hair. For what it's worth,> Cher, I don't think you're going through a mid-life> crisis. Also, maybe the length where you are at now> will be the length that works best for you. You might> find as it grows longer that you looked best with it> where it is now, or perhaps a bit shorter. At any> rate, think about it before any rash decisions.> Thanks to Diane and Jade for saying you enjoyed the> joke.> I thought it would get a chuckle or two.> Holly

Hello Cher:I just wanted to share with you that twice a year I participant in a trade show and in that show there is this very beautiful woman that has similar hair coloring as yours with the streaks. She looks very elegant and it is not only my opinion. I have heard many many men comment on her looks.I have no idea how long her hair is but in the shows she keeps it in a bun. She seems to be in our age group. I have seen her with this look for five years now.I wish you peace in whatever decisions you make.

Cher,Like you I have been questioning keeping my long hair. My hair is waist-length and naturally curly (type 3a). The only time I really like my hair is when I straighten it and then use a curling iron on it. Well, you can imagine how long this takes! I do not have time to do this during the week. I usually keep my hair natural (with curling gels, etc...). I don't think I look good with my hair up, I've tried it. I've been comtemplating cutting a considerable amount off, maybe to just a few inches below the shoulders. My hair is in very good condition, but with the curls and all, I don't think I look as good this way as how I used to have it (shorter). I guess I could say "did the waist-length thing" and am ready to move on to another style. Best of luck to whatever you decide. :-)Jennifer

Dave,I have hair that the longer it grows, the curlier it gets. Curly hair is nice...for people to don't have it! LOL! :-) Believe me, if you had naturally curly hair, you'd know what I mean. :-) Yes, if I cut it somewhat shorter, it'd still be curly, but not AS curly (it's that type 3a again, straight at the roots, wavy in the middle and spiral towards the ends) :-p.