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What to do?

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MenaceIISociety View Drop Down
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    Posted: June 16 2004 at 11:57pm
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Young L da Kid View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Young L da Kid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 16 2004 at 11:55pm
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Jade21 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jade21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 9:13pm
Dear Alex,I am glad that you are a concerned father:)I want to tell you that I do not have children, but at the very least, as her father, I think that you can insist that your daughter keep her hair clean and not in total disarray.I think at age 10 it is more than reasonable that your daughter assume a substantial portion of the care for her hair. Like your mother-in-law, my mother had no problem with long hair, but she insisted what I have advocated. Personally, at age 10, it is more than time to deal with personal hygiene, of which hair is a part.I also think that you could help in terms of different styles to avoid the unkempt look. Things like braids, ponytails and the like are wonderful for longer hair and keep it rid of tangles.From what you've written, I sense that you feel a bit caught in the middle. Be firm:) I do think there is middle ground your daughter's lack of care for the hair and your mother-in-law's free form approach.Bye for now,Jade21I have a problem and need some advice. In light of> recent comments, I am even more confused on what to> do. My daughter 10, has long blonde hair(7-8"> past her shoulders). She is not a real neat person,> and her hair usually looks unkempt at best. To make> matters worse, she is letting her bangs grow out which> adds to her look. Her Gramdmother, My mother-in-law> lives across the street, has urged her to let her hair> grow out. In the past I was sucessful in keeping her> hair trimmed up(nothing drastic, 2-3"past her> shoulders). But, I feel with her Nanny's comments, she> is against have her haircut at all. Im not into> forcing her to cut her hair, and part of me wants to> stand back and hope she starts to take better care of> her hair. I have mentioned to her about keeping her> hair brushed etc...So am I doing the right thing by> not saying any more than I do or does anyone have any> suggestions. Any insight is welcome, thank you.
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Diane from Canada View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 9:13pm
>>This reminds me of my boyfriend situation. He felt that his six year old needed to get a haircut to make his life easier . She has wavy hair and decided that she wanted to look like a spice girl so it turn out alright.ASk your daughter if she wants to try a new hairstyle. I am surprise that she doesn't have this need to go with the trends. I bet she probably had the longest hair in her class just like my little buddy.I am not sure when kids actually take care of themselves. I have two sons and just now my 12 year old does things on his own concerning his looks.
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Jena View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jena Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 9:12pm
Since your daughter doesn't appear to take very good care of her hair, why is her grandmother encouraging her to grow it longer?This is a potentially awkward situation, but here's what I would do. Tell her your daughter she may keep her hair longer *if* she takes care of it. You will help her put it up in braids, pigtails, or something else if she will be active, but at the very minimum, it needs to be combed at least twice a day and washed (you determine the minimum -- in summer, my 9-year-old daughter's hair is a bit oily and is washed 5-6 times a week). Taking care of it also means she has to have trims (only a tiny bit) at regular intervals 8-12 weeks apart.Therefore, you are putting the responsibility on her -- where it should be. If she really wants long hair as badly as she says she does, then she will take care of it. If she doesn't take care of it, that means she either doesn't want the long hair or she is too young to properly take care of it -- and then you would be acting appropriately to keep it shorter. Not a drastic cut! But up to the shoulders would allow it to have some length, yet not look like a rat's nest.A child her age is old enough to have some responsibility. If she asks for help with her hair, I'd certainly offer it. But if she completely ignores it, then she really doesn't care and is most likely only being egged on by her grandmother or is just being stubborn. You are the parent and should not put up with catering to whims like this. It produces spoiled children, and you're doing no one a favor.Best wishes!
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alex View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote alex Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 9:12pm
I have a problem and need some advice. In light of recent comments, I am even more confused on what to do. My daughter 10, has long blonde hair(7-8" past her shoulders). She is not a real neat person, and her hair usually looks unkempt at best. To make matters worse, she is letting her bangs grow out which adds to her look. Her Gramdmother, My mother-in-law lives across the street, has urged her to let her hair grow out. In the past I was sucessful in keeping her hair trimmed up(nothing drastic, 2-3"past her shoulders). But, I feel with her Nanny's comments, she is against have her haircut at all. Im not into forcing her to cut her hair, and part of me wants to stand back and hope she starts to take better care of her hair. I have mentioned to her about keeping her hair brushed etc...So am I doing the right thing by not saying any more than I do or does anyone have any suggestions. Any insight is welcome, thank you.
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