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nephew's hair

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Bob View Drop Down
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Joined: December 11 2000
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 10:02pm
> Jenny,> You are open minded not to allow your personal> preference for shorter hairstyles for boys to> influence your decision with your nephew. You still> need a win-win situation. Allow him to maintain the> present length, but set boundaries on how long he can> grow his hair. Maybe following the hospital incident,> he is ready to appear more boyish. If he is willing to> accept the consequences of his action, let him rebel> but don't protect him from the consequences of> non-conformity.oh bull let him grow it as long as he wants he aint hurting anyone....down to his butt if thats what he wants
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Diane from Canada View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 10:02pm
>Your answer reminded me of a funny movie that I watched last week with the kids. It was called Major Payne.He shaved the kids's hair because they didn't behave in his army style class thing.He said that they had to own the right to wear their hair.I am not saying anything. It just reminded me of the funny movie. Have you ever watch it?
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Steve View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Steve Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 10:03pm
> He shaved the kids's hair because they didn't behave> in his army style class thing.> He said that they had to own the right to wear their> hair.> I am not saying anything. It just reminded me of the> funny movie. Have you ever watch it?Diane,No, I've not seen the movie. Tell me more about the funny movie, can it be rented? Thanks for the "light" reading.I must say that when we join the service though, the induction cut is a method the services have of enforcing conformity and discipline. Hopefully, parents will not rely on such strong disciplinary measures.
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Diane from Canada View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Diane from Canada Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 11 2000 at 10:03pm
> Diane,> No, I've not seen the movie. Tell me more about the> funny movie, can it be rented? Thanks for the> "light" reading.> I must say that when we join the service though, the> induction cut is a method the services have of> enforcing conformity and discipline. Hopefully,> parents will not rely on such strong disciplinary> measures.Hello Steve:Yes you can rent the movie. It is a old one. It was about a bunch of cadets kids and the leader was trained in the army. He was very rough and didn't know how to relate to the kids so he was treating them as men. If you have children they will love seeing the movie. My kids couldn't stop laughing.
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wavywmn View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote wavywmn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 16 2000 at 8:23pm
I respect you for asking other people what their opionions are on this matter...
Anyhow, I probably wouldn't push him to get his hair cut, or use it as a punishment/reward. First off, I'll assume that he has a lot of issues going on in his mind, such as living with a new relative, maybe going to a new school, dealing emotionally with family problems and adolescence in general (I'm only assuming these things, I haven't read all the posts from you). The last issue in the world that he should be pressured about is his hair-- unless it's so inappropriate that he'd be expelled from school or totally ostrasized for it, which I doubt would happen too much to him from other young people. I remember being in a similar situation, and it made me totally despise my mother at the time. Of all the issues I had to deal with while being 12, she had to focus on how I wore my hair-- she didn't like the fact that I wore it in a tight ponytail, she wanted me to tease it (I'm a female)-- despite the fact that I had much worse issues to deal with-- I was depressed, had no friends, wrote suicide notes. To me it seemed as if she just wanted infantile bodilly control over me, and didn't exactly enrich our relationship together. I'm not saying that you don't have his best interests at heart, but he'll probably think it's just an attempt to control him in a trivial way, and he may isolate himself from you, or rebel. Long hair simply isn't an issue to create warfare over, in my opinion. I've met many guys since Jr. High who had long hair, or strange hairdos, and most of them were the nicest, most congenial, mellow people I have ever met. Having a pony tail might give him a sense of identity, of being different from kids at school who all follow the same trends. I wouldn't use it as a reward/punishment. It seems so cruel to cut hair as a means to punish or reward anyone, let alone a child or preteen. Just my $0.02.
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BlondeDana View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BlondeDana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 26 2000 at 8:46pm
Do not make him cut it. In a few years he'll cut it by himself, and that'll be the end of it. Let him have long hair while he still can when he's young.
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