QuoteReplyTopic: Thoughts on long hair Posted: January 25 2000 at 7:31pm
Now-a-days, truly long hair is a rare site. And whenever I do see long hair, it is usually worn by older ladies. I also noticed that my monthly dose of long hair sitings usually comes from the health food store, when I go to buy my vitamins and other goodies. And finally, I also noticed that these people (mostly women, but men too) do not take good care of their hair. They take special pride in using organic products and in going "natural," but their hair is full of split ends and breakage, and they rarely have trims. In other words, when we find our society stereotypically associating long hair with hippie-wana-be's, it is generally true, at least where I live.
At the same time, long hair is also a symbol of glamour, exotic beaty, femininity (sorry guys, but this is usually the case), and health. Yesterday I was flipping through a magazine, and I saw two different Pantene ads, where the models had thick, long, shiny, gorgeous red hair.
These two images of long hair clearly contradict each other. Society can't make up its mind about what long hair is supposed to symbolize. However, I think I can make out one similarity in these two contradictions: either way, whether un-taken-care-of or papmered, long hair is DIFFERENT.
Now, I pose a few questions for those with long hair: if everyone wore their hair long, would you wear yours long too, or would you cut it, just to be different? How much of your identity does your long hair hold? Do you feel that if you have long hair, you are obligated to show it off? What kinds of people usually have long hair, in terms of personality? I don't think there's a right or wrong answer to these questions-- but I would be interested in hearing your opinions.
I'm trying to grow my hair, but I don't really invest any of my identity in it. It's just my hair-not my soul or my self-image. I can't really imagine being a different person, if I cut it short or managed to grow it down to my waist. The only difference is in the maintenance time it requires!
Why does long hair have to signify just one type of person ? I think both ways can be beautiful in their own way -- just like different looking people are attractive. Would you really want everybody to look the same ?
DaveDecker
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Senior Moderator
Joined: November 28 2000
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 3247
I have very long hair, that is well-cared for -- neatly-trimmed and not ratty or full of split ends.
If everyone else wore their hair long, I would not cut mine -- I don't wear mine to "be different," I wear it long because I like it long.
My identity is defined primarily by my personality traits and my physical attributes (of which my hair is but one element). It's up to others to decide whether or not, and if so to what extent, they want to identify me with my hair.
I am under no obligation to "show off" my hair, but there are times and places when I enjoy doing so.
What kinds of people usually have long hair, in terms of personality? Those who like it long, and who have the patience to grow it, and who have the determination to properly care for it.
I recall you saying some time ago that you have long hair. Would you be willing to answer your own questions for us here?
Thanks for answering my message. Sure, I'll answer!
If everyone wore their hair long, I wouldn't cut my hair either. I like the feeling of it on my skin, and I really like the length. Besides, I think that short hair wouldn't suit my face.
I think that long hair does not affect personality (at least it doesn't affect mine), but sometimes, others try to read my personality by looking at my hair. People who don't know me seem to think that because I have long hair, I am weak, shy, not outgoing, old-fasioned, house-wifely...the list can go on. I get a little upset by this not because all of these qualities are bad, but because I am completely oposite of them.
On the other hand, I haven't cut my hair in 12 years, and I feel that if I lost all of my length, I would be loosing an important (but not essential) part of myself. I put so much effort and care into growing it out, that I think it would be an emotional shock to suddenly have short hair. This would not change my personality, but it would be hard emotionally.
People often tell me that since I have long hair, I should wear it down (I usually have it up in a bun). I think that a)no one has the right to tell me how I should wear my hair, b)I only put my hair down for special occasions or for special people, and c)I kinda like the fact that no one really knows what my hair looks like:)
As to what kinds of people have long hair, I agree with your statements. I would also add: people who are not afraid of the attention (both negative and positive) that long hair attracts. This doesn't mean that people wear long hair for the sake of attention, but when the attention is there, they are not afraid of it.
I don't think that long hair has to signify just one type of person. I said, it seems to me that SOCIETY tries to do so. I personally would hate for everyone to look the same. Check out my response to Dave.
PD
Jennifer
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Member
Joined: November 30 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 748
I have to admit a personal prejudice and preference: With rare exception, I think longer hair is more feminine on women. It doesn't have to be super long, either. However, I've also seen people with long hair that unfortunately has been largely ignored. The same holds true for short hair, but with long hair, there's simply more of it, so it's more noticeable. And unfortunately, many people look at hair like that and think, "Yuck! Long hair is so messy and unkempt." It can be, but it doesn't have to be!
>>Now, I pose a few questions for those with long hair: if everyone wore their hair long, would you wear yours long too, or would you cut it, just to be different?
Until last summer, I had long hair and am currently growing it out. If I were the only one with long hair, I'd still want and wear mine long. If everyone else wore long hair, I'd still want and wear mine long. I may slightly amend the styling so I don't look like I'm stuck in a certain time period, but I would wear the style that looks best on me, and I'd wear the length long (about mid-back looks best on me).
>>How much of your identity does your long hair hold?
Honest answer? More than I'd care to admit. Hair is a simple covering on our heads and shouldn't make a difference in our identities. To many, it doesn't. To many, it does. I didn't realize just how much it did to me until I cut my hair short. But it wasn't an awful experience, as I did learn to concentrate on my other areas of identity and beauty. Also, the longer my hair grows, the more I appreciate it!
>>Do you feel that if you have long hair, you are obligated to show it off?
No, but I'm not really sure I understand the question.
>>What kinds of people usually have long hair, in terms of personality?
From my experience only, I've seen two kinds: Those who do not take care of it at all and also don't take very good care of the rest of their bodies -- bad teeth, overweight, and such. And the opposite -- those who take immaculate care of it and do show it off. For both situations -- I'm using examples of people with hair almost waist-length or longer.
Jennifer
DaveDecker
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Senior Moderator
Joined: November 28 2000
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 3247
Wow, thanks for your response, PD! Really enjoyed reading it.
So let's see... you're a strong, confident, outgoing, and conventional professional woman, with long hair. Oh my! :-)
I agree with you -- nobody should tell you how to wear your hair. And I also agree with your additions to "what kinds of people have long hair." I live these experiences too. :-)
You take care too, PD!
Dave D.
Mark
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Newbie
Joined: December 13 2000
Location: Puerto Rico
Status: Offline
Points: 9
I do not agree with your statement. For some ladies,long hair is an important part of their female identity. As a man, I think long hair can provide a very brilliant enhancement of the female identity. In my area,where I live, some ladies consider long hair an important part of their female identity,and feel good about the artistic enhancement their long hair gives them. I am taking notice of the fact that there is some increase in ladies over age 40,that are growing waist length hair,and very happy and feel very good about the patience,they took to grow long hair. Then there are some other ladies,who look upon their hair as trouble some appendage,who do not care about their hair,but might miss out on the brilliant enhancement long hair could be,for them.
Lady Godiva
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Newbie
Joined: December 02 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 42
Like you, I've been growing my hair for 12 years. How cool! How long is yours?
To your questions:
- If everyone wore their hair long, would you wear yours long too, or would you cut it, just to be different?
I wear my hair long because I like it this way, so I would/will keep it long regardless of fad and trend. I enjoy being different, yes, but even if all women wore theirs to waist-, hip- or derriere-length, mine would still be unique for its extra length. So I'd still get to have my cake and eat it too. :-)
- How much of your identity does your long hair hold?
People often identify me with long hair in general, so they infer more than perhaps is real. For myself, it's more accurate to say my long hair reflects who I am. It requires patience, dedication and a deep, healthy sense of self to be able to ignore those ignorant and arrogant comments to cut my hair, and to brush off the superficial dictates of self-appointed fashion cops.
- Do you feel that if you have long hair, you are obligated to show it off?
Never obligated. For practicality, I usually wear it up. Sometimes people ask me to take it down, and this is a treat, because I like to show it off! However, it's never a requirement to always wear it down. Anyone putting such demands on me will get nothing more than a sour glare in return.
- What kinds of people usually have long hair, in terms of personality?
Long haired people have to be patient and able to see the long term. They are also people who realize they are going to garner attention, be it positive or negative. They have to be able to accept and take both. They have to be willing to be different, at least in this day and age, when long hair is rare. This means a sense of determination and individuality.
I'm jumping in a little late here--hopefully not /too/ late. :)
It's always been my impression that when people maintain a specific "look," they do so with specific inspiration. Generally they have a role model or theme in mind.
In my experience, these are the kinds of people who wear long hair:
* People in love with period clothing, historical romance, medieval dance and/or re-creation, roleplaying, vampires, etc. I'll throw comic books in here too.
* Musicians/music fans of certain genres (heavy metal, alternative).
* Women from extremely conservative walks of life (very often Christian, Mormon, or Seikh, or from the deep South, Appalachia, or Utah).
* Men and women from extremely liberal walks of life (Goths, performing artists, Wiccans, health junkies, anyone with lifestyle in which it's a status boon to look as different as possible).
* Models.
* People who are emulating a movie star, film role, or actual person who has impressed them.
Obviously everyone can't be pigeonholed, but I think anyone with long hair will admit that one or more of these factors plays a part in their preference.
The way long hair is perceived on a person depends on what that person looks like otherwise. If the person is generally unfit and unkempt, the long hair will be seen as the result of lazy grooming or inattention to her appearance.
If a woman with long hair wears it unstyled and dresses in modest, frowsy, dull-colored outfits, she will be perceived as conservative and housewife-ish. Buns are convenient, but they almost always scream "old fashioned" and "dowdy."
Hair is an accessory like anything else. Like my red miniskirt. If I pair my red minskirt with combat boots and an anorak, I look very hip and Greenwich Village. I wear the same red miniskirt with argyle tights, a sweater set, and Mary Janes, I look young and preppy. If I wear it with stiletto heels.....well, you get the picture.
Ally
dianefromcanada
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Member
Joined: December 15 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 559
I wonder where you live that you happen to see older ladies wearing their hair long or maybe I should ask you how old is an older lady? lol Well many long hair people do take pride in keeping their hair in good shape. Personally I try my hardest to make sure I am using good products and I do dicipline myself in having trims. For example my hair was almost to my waist and decided it needed a good trim and now it is growing fairly quickly to the lenght I had. I don't use any organic products. I have no desire of wanting to be a hippie lol I had short hair and now I would like to see how long it can get. I really don't think I will allow it to go past my knees. NOt at all. I am a very down to earth type of person and have no desire to show off. I came across a lot of diffirent type of personalities and diffirent types of careers that ladies have long hair. What I do have to say is that a long hair person needs to have a sense of humor because our hair tends to get us in trouble more often.
dianefromcanada
dianefromcanada
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Member
Joined: December 15 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 559
People in love with period clothing, historical romance, medieval dance and/or re-creation, roleplaying, vampires, etc. I'll throw comic books in here too.
I wonder if that is why a lot of the lingerie catalogues like showing a long hair woman wearing lingerie. Not everyone that is in love with historical has long hair. I haven't seen a vampire lately have you? lol ( Diane)
* Women from extremely conservative walks of life (very often Christian, Mormon, or Seikh, or from the deep South, Appalachia, or Utah).
I been to utah and seen many many short hair ladies . I guess times have change. Do you have a specific Christian religion in mind that seems to have a lot of long hair ladies because I am Christian and that doesn't ring a bell.( Diane)
* Men and women from extremely liberal walks of life (Goths, performing artists, Wiccans, health junkies, anyone with lifestyle in which it's a status boon to look as different as possible).
Well I don't know who knows mabye our modern day Wiccans have middle length hair. It is not like those people come up and say here I am and here is my hair length. ( Diane)
Buns are convenient, but they almost always scream "old fashioned" and "dowdy." there goes our ballirina look. Buns are also seen as very elegant. ( Diane)
And I love your adorable way of misconstruing what was said. Ha ha ha. Ha.
Diane, you've completely twisted my post around. I stated (pretty darned clearly) that most long hairs have one of the listed factors as an inspiration or background. I did NOT state the corollary, which is that everyone covered by these descriptions has long hair. OBVIOUSLY that is not true.
The women modeling lingerie are /models/, are they not? I listed models as a separate category.
And I did not say that VAMPIRES have long hair. Duh. I referred to "people who love period clothing, historical romance, medieval re-creation, roleplaying, vampires, etc." The serial commas indicate that "vampires" is the object of "people who love," hence "people who love vampires." Perhaps you are not familiar with the vast American and Canadian subculture that shops for velvet and leather wardrobes at stores like Hot Topic, modeling their look after Gothic art and vampire lore. They dye their hair dark colors and wear dramatic ensembles with capes, top hats, and black lace. These people are usually between 14 and 24, and they frequent "Goth" clubs dedicated to this trend. Many of them have very long hair as part of the look.
There is also an international organization called the Society for Creative Anachronism (SCA), whose members re-create medieval costume, dining, dance, and fighting styles. Many of its members are so dedicated to the pastime that they wear their hair long, as they would have in the Middle Ages. There are many variations on this theme in the form of live roleplaying groups all over the world.
And of COURSE I did not say that all women from Utah have very long hair. But the fact is that Utah has the largest population of conservative Mormons in the country. Have you ever seen articles or documentaries on these communities? I'm especially talking about places where polygamy is still an issue. Many (not ALL) of the women have /very/ long hair and are discouraged from cutting it short. There are many, many forms of Christianity, and many levels of conservatism under its umbrella. In some factions, where old-fashioned sensibilities prevail, young women tend to wear their hair very long.
And before you draw another skewed conclusion, let me clarify: I am not saying that everyone with long hair is from Utah. I am not saying that everyone in Utah is Mormon. I am not saying that all (or even most) Mormons are polygamists. I am not saying that all Christians have long hair. I am not saying that long hairs should convert to Christianity. I am not saying that vampires should convert to Christianity. I am not saying that lingerie models consort with vampires, seeking virgin blood to maintain their size-2 figures and add shine to their hair. I feel certain you will find something I have missed and feel the need to call me on it in your next post.
Anyway, I believe the thread was about /very/ long hair, and what kinds of people adopt extreme length. I listed some examples, and I stand by what I said.
Ally
dianefromcanada
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Member
Joined: December 15 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 559
Actually Ally the whole point is that long hair is rare right? Then if long hair is rare then there are many other lenghts that share the some common grounds right?
Just would like to know if you actually seen a Vampire or even believe in Vampires or you happen to be a fan of Buffy the Vampire story line? lol
Witches well they don't normally come out and announced themselves so we have no idea if they have rules to their lenght of hair. In fact I have come across one and she had short hair. The biggest Gothic store is here Ally and I wouldn't say they happen to have long hair. Maybe mediun lenght. I have seen a male shopping at Walmart. Oh that was fun. Maybe they play with wigs but certainly I haven't seen to many with natural long hair. I am aware of SCA. I been to Utah. Ally I wasn't drawing any conclusions but it seems very interesting how quickly you seem to defend.What I have notice that long hair in your opinion would certainly have a diffirent defination than mine for sure and that is okay. Have a nice day Ally
Actually Ally the whole point is that long hair is rare right? Then if long hair is rare then there are many other lenghts that share the some common grounds right?
** Sure. But I think most distinctive, extreme looks (very long hair, a mohawk, a shaved head) have particular inspiration. They are not mainstream styles. They're not something you see in a magazine one day and bring in to your hairstylist to try out.
Just would like to know if you actually seen a Vampire or even believe in Vampires or you happen to be a fan of Buffy the Vampire story line? lol
** I don't believe in vampires, nor am I a fan of Buffy. (I've never seen it, alas.) But I do roleplay live-action Vampire, a gaming system produced by WhiteWolf of Atlanta. Many of the players wear very long hair. I have a mid-back-length fall and a waist-length wig that I wear to play certain characters.
Witches well they don't normally come out and announced themselves so we have no idea if they have rules to their lenght of hair. In fact I have come across one and she had short hair.
** I am a practicing witch who lives a couple of hours outside Salem. I can't say this enough times: Not ALL witches have long hair. And it's not a rule. But people who live the Wiccan lifestyle are /more likely/ to choose long hair, because of cultural and spiritual influences. Because we embrace nature, for example, we are more likely to see long hair as a treasure. Because we refer to and/or commune with various goddesses, and these goddesses are usually portrayed with long, flowing hair, some us of idealize this look. We see ourselves as romantic and different, and we like the outside to reflect the inside.
The biggest Gothic store is here Ally and I wouldn't say they happen to have long hair. Maybe mediun lenght. I have seen a male shopping at Walmart. Oh that was fun. Maybe they play with wigs but certainly I haven't seen to many with natural long hair.
** Around here, if you go to Manray or Gotham City or The Bank (before it closed), you can see lots of young people with very long hair. It's part of that morbid, romantic look.
Ally I wasn't drawing any conclusions but it seems very interesting how quickly you seem to defend.
** I was quick to defend myself because it seemed that (1) you were belittling me, and (2) that you completely misunderstood what I wrote. I don't like being laughingly contradicted for something I didn't even say. "All people from Utah have long hair" is not just a misinterpretation of what I wrote; it's a downright idiotic statement that I don't care to be associated with!
What I have notice that long hair in your opinion would certainly have a diffirent defination than mine for sure and that is okay.
>>Long haired people have to be patient and able to see the long term.
I think that is quite an understatement. {grin} As my hair is growing out, it's starting to get to a "chunky" stage. Well-shaped short hair can look good, but the really thick short hair is not appealing to me in the least. It would look a lot better if I texturized it and had it shaped, but it would also hinder growth. Although length wouldn't actually be cut off, eventually, the texturized (slightly shorter) parts would need trimming, and it would just be easier to trim the rest of the hair to that length, as well. If my hair were several inches longer, it would look fantastic right now! It's thick, healthy, and shiny. But this in-between stuff is the reason many people don't let it grow out. It is frustrating!
Hi Jennifer, only a few more inches, eh? Sounds like you're almost there!
More often than not, we have to be patient with unpleasant things in our lives. I find that growing out hair is an exception to this. Even if it is not yet the desirable length, it is so fun taking care of hair, that the process of growing it out is more rewarding than the goal, especially when you're almost there.
Take care, PD
Jennifer
Members Profile
Send Private Message
Find Members Posts
Add to Buddy List
Member
Joined: November 30 2000
Status: Offline
Points: 748
I'm still a good year-and-a-half from where I want to be. But the top of my hair is playing catch-up with the bottom because it was originally very layered in the back. Ah well, I'll get there!
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot create polls in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Topic Options
Post Options
Thanks(0)
