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Length/Style double standard

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bobbedguy View Drop Down
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    Posted: July 17 2000 at 11:53am
Please help me to understand the thinking behind hairstyles and lengths as they pertain to men and women. Time and time again I see posts where women are wanting short hair, even buzzcuts and flattops. Most times these women are encouraged to go for it. In efect these girls are getting haircuts that are shorter and shorter and according to traditional thinking more masculine. Also, as I look around each day for beautiful women I see many of them with really short hair. It seems that women can have any length or style of hair that they want. Men on the other hand seem to be forced to adhere to short cuts with no options of going long or trying different styles to see what best suites their face and features. Why is it that women have the freedom to do whatever they want with their hair but men do not? I am a guy and truthfully I look like a dork with short hair. Therefore I chose to let it grow and in consulting with a stylist determined that a nice bob below my ears with bangs would be the best style for me. I now have my hair cut in that below the ear bob with bangs and I love it. The problem is that I can tell that other people give me strange looks and no doubt talk about me behind my back. I really don't care about that but what is the big deal here? Each person looks good with their own style and men should have the right to have a longer style and the right to choose a style that fits their features just like women. This isn't true now. So why the double standard?
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jsheats View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jsheats Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2000 at 8:09pm
Your question would doubtlessly provoke spirited (and inconclusive) debate among even a group of professional psychologists, let alone armchair ones. I suspect that the answer is not simple. It is not confined to hair styles: people like George Sand could gain respect (admittedly not without much work and difficulty) using a male name and clothing, and working in what was then a strictly male world, while the counterpart for men has essentially NEVER been true. Probably something in our genes acquired during hunter-gatherer days makes the typical male respond with such hostility to any hint of "feminine" (according to the definition of the community) character in another male.

I have worn bangs and hair shoulder length or longer (and no beard) with significant amounts of styling (though not as much as I would have liked) since 1971, and I have endured countless jeers and insults as a consequence. Nevertheless, I have also received a great many compliments (from strangers as well as from friends and family - especially my wife and children), and these make it clear that being true to myself is the right thing to do. It has also not stopped me from achieving professional success in a large technology-oriented company (though this might not have been true were I in sales instead of R&D!).
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bobbedguy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bobbedguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 04 2000 at 8:33am
Seeing that no one is posting it must mean that everyone agrees that there is a huge double standard. It is wrong and we need to do something to change this and overcome it. As a guy I want more options for my hair and more freedom to be me.
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bobbedguy View Drop Down
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I had to resurect this thread (many of you might be tired of me but) because the other day it happened again. My hair is still cut in the one length bob below my ears with bangs and a clippered nape. Well I pulled up beside two girls in a car at a traffic light. I glanced over and me and the girl in the passenger seat made eye contact. Then a few seconds later I glanced back and both girls were looking at me giggling. Why? I guess the double standard lives on when it comes to hairstyles and length as it pertains to men and women. Women can do anything with their hair but guys are expected by society to have short hair. Go figure.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote admin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 04 2001 at 4:10pm
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Who says that they were giggling about your hair. Maybe they thought you were cute. Girls giggle at all kinds of things.
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wolfgang View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote wolfgang Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 05 2001 at 7:02am
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I don`t take care anymore what society thinks about my hair, now it reaches down to my shoulder blades. Sometimes people look friendly at me, sometimes not, but I get no negative comments about my hair (also no positive ones).

Society is composed of individuals with different opinions, I can not take care what everyone may think. I have to fullfill my job and I get friends through my personality.

My problem is quite different from yours. I appreciate the long hair on women and I can not find much in society which matches my sight of view. Maybe the internet will help to clear my thoughts.

wolfgang
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David Justin Lynch View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote David Justin Lynch Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 09 2001 at 9:30pm
Women should have long hair, at least to the shoulder blades. Men should have short hair, above the collar and above the ears and out of the face. Period, end of story.
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McKee View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote McKee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 10 2001 at 6:36pm
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Well, let`s see what I`m going to say here. Well many guys to look better with longer hair, I mean for those of you who may be familiar with the band Hanson, they all had longer hair and looked great. Now hat 2 of them cut it looks eh so-so. So my point is that some guys do look better with longer hair but some styles are still meant for girls. I do not think that women should have short hair... ear length bob @ the absolute shortest.
"If everybody demanded peace instead of another television set, then there`d be peace"

~John W. Lennon
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bobbedguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 11 2001 at 7:26am
Mckee, I don`t understand why you think that some styles are still meant for girls. I mean probably the majority of women these days (if not the majority then pretty close) have these short shag cuts and boy cuts. Some girl look very attractive with those styles to me. And some guys look better with longer styles as in my case. I guess what I am driving at is who is to say what styles and lengths a guy or girl should wear? If the girls can have boy haircuts (and some women do have very short to even crew cuts) then why can`t guys wear longer cuts/styles that were traditionally girls styles? I really don`t care if people think that I have a girls hairstyle because it is my hair and I wear it the way that I like it and that is this one length bob below my ears with bangs. I just don`t understand how and where the lines get drawn as to length and styles for guys and girls. I also don`t understand why any style or length should be reserved for a guy or a girl. Can anyone help me here?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote lgp82 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 13 2001 at 7:51pm
A certain length or style shouldn`t be reserved for a guy or girl. However, that is the way it is. I`m not sure why. Personally I think the shorter a guy`s hair is the better. I cut my boyfriend`s hair once a week with a #1 on the sides and back and a #2 on the top. I leave a small thin section of "bangs" that are cut short and I chop into them so they aren`t straight across. I guess I don`t have issues with "bangs" like this. If one would even consider them bangs, which I do not, but since they are slightly on his forehead I guess some might consider them bangs.
I do think it looks a bit silly when guys have bangs that they style with a round brush type of thing. I guess if a guy has pretty short hair ( doesn`t have to be buzzed) and bangs it would be ok. But sorry, the long hair and bangs, YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the end, it`s your hair. Do whatever makes YOU happy!
If someone laughs, smile, they`ll wonder what you are thinking....
~*~*Lisa*~*~
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Tracee View Drop Down
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quote:

David Justin Lynch originally wrote:
Women should have long hair, at least to the shoulder blades. Men should have short hair, above the collar and above the ears and out of the face. Period, end of story.

Excuse me? Umm, that is a majorly sexist remark. Maybe girls want their hair short , or maybe guys want their hair long.
Besides the fact, the "period, end of story" made it sound like you were stating a fact, not an opinion.-COME ON. Grow up.
-Tracee
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David Justin Lynch,

When I come home tonight, I`ll check the schedule for shuttle flights and see when the next one leaves for the planet of the apes. Maybe they can teach you something. :)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote glitterjess Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 25 2001 at 3:15pm
I don`t really see anything wrong with having long hair and being a guy as long as its taken care off and doesn`t look greasy or anything like that. I knew a man who had long hair and always kepted it back in a braid, to me it looked fine and one day he cut it all off and he looked totally differnt I never thought anything bad about him just because he had long hair.

Bobbedguy:Just a question: Don`t you go to the chickclick message boards as well as other hair forums or websites for girls and women?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote whatever Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 26 2001 at 10:34am
I think it fine for a guy to have long hair as long as there take care of it and it not really long . but if i guy has very soft facial features then long hair uusally makes them look more like they have a womens hairstyle but this is just my opion .
whatever nigga im still brushin!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bobbedguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 26 2001 at 2:26pm
I do take very good care of my hair. I wash it and condition it every day and then use a round brush and blow dryer to style it. I just love the versatility and swing that my hair has. I must say that I probably don`t have the most masculine facial features but then I think that is one reason that my stylist suggested this style because it fits my facial features. That is something that most guys aren`t afforded I think. I mean they get a haircut that is "proper" for a guy or a cut that is "in style" whether it looks good on them or not. Personally I think that most guys allow society to strip them of their personality and self expression because they feel that they MUST have a short haircut. I`m not letting them do that to me. Besides, who has been nominated to say what is feminine and what is masculine? I mean more and more girls and women are getting these really short boy cuts and crew cuts so why isn`t it acceptable for guys to get longer styles even if it is usually considered as a girls style if it suits the guys features?
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Jennifer View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jennifer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 30 2001 at 9:36pm
Hi bobbedguy,

You`ve been posting essentially the same message for months and months and months..... Quite honestly, I`ve never known a guy so obsessed with his hair!

If you`ve firmly convinced of your masculinity, then why do you care what other people think?

Do you have any inclinations of wearing a dress? Wearing make-up?

Why are you so obsessed with your hair?

Personally, I prefer short hair on men. But if a guy prefers longer hair, then I don`t have a problem with it. But it seems you desire full societal approval of your long hair. Don`t think you`ll find it.

With all due respect, I personally feel that hair dryers and curling irons are very effeminate. Why do they appeal to you? Do you ever feel like putting curlers in your hair?

Do you think men and women are different, except for their plumbing?

Why do you want a girls` hairstyle?

Jennifer

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote phil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 05 2001 at 7:16pm
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Again, I agree wholeheartedly with you. I posted a message on the same lines on Dec 9, 2000 under General Hair Talk. The guy is an effeminate narcissist and while he has every right to be so, why bore the rest of us every month? Give us a break, Jamie.
phil
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I must chime in with agreement here too....bobbedguy, Jamie, whatever, I`m really very very bored with this topic...and ultimately it is of zero interest to just about anyone but you.

I have waist length hair - do I seek society`s wholehearted approval? No. Do I care if some of society doesn`t approve? Not in the least. Be happy, don`t be happy...but let it go, man!!!!!
:o)
Chris
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Waggy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: November 10 2001 at 8:17pm
Of course there is a double standard - but it`s not a law - do what you want - but don`t bitch about people noticing if it`s unusual. That applies to a lot of things...wags
Be yourself - unless you suck...wags
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I`ve always liked guys with longer hair. I`ve never understood why most guys feel they need to keep their hair short. And I don`t understand why they all feel the need to cake their hair with product, either...

And, if you guys are sick of this guy posting the same topic over and over...then STOP READING IT. Don`t whine about it because *you* came to read it, even when you probably already knew what it was about.
- kat
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