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Topic ClosedLong hair on boys ok or not?

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Tina View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: December 30 2001 at 2:00pm
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Colonel,
Thank you for responding, but I think you have some misconceptions regarding my son`s hair. After re-reading my post I realize that I wasn`t totally clear. My divorce had nothing to do with growing his hair long. In fact, at that time Robbie`s hair was already below his shoulders. I guess I think of the divorce as the time I could get really serious about growing it without my ex`s constant complaining about his son looking like a little girl. Actually the divorce was one of the best things that ever happened to me. Since then I have completed high school & community college, & am @ 1+ years from my nursing degree. I admitt that growing his hair out was something selfish, but it really meant a lot to me. I know I am biased, but Robbie is really cute, & much more so with long hair. The haircut at 10 yrs. was never my idea. It started out as a conversation I had with my sister in law when Robbie was almost 8. She was asking about when I was going to cut it & I said my goal was waist length, & I was hopping to be there when he was 10. So she spread it all over the family that Robbis was getting his hair cut when he turned 10. This has put unneeded pressure on both of us to cut it. I am fortunate in that he has never asked for a haircut. I honestly don`t know what I would have done if he had wanted it cut before it got to this length. All I know is that I have a beautiful portrait taken last month hanging in my bedroom that I will cherish forever. So if & when it gets cut I will survive.

Tina
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TANYA View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: December 30 2001 at 6:20pm
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Although I like long hair on guys, a study was done at I think either Yale or Harvard that was paid for by Physique and it showed that guys with longer hair were not taken as seriously as guys with shorter, cleaner cuts. The study was published in January of 2001 and you can see the results on the Physique or Proctor Gamble page (they own Physique).

So while I do love long hair on guys, I know that many people feel that it puts a guy at a disadvantage. Please no hate posts to me, I am just telling you about the study and what it said.

On the other hand I think everyone should be free to wear their hair as they want to.

Peace
TANYA H.
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duke View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: December 31 2001 at 12:05pm
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We see what you mean, Tanya, but please don`t force your son to get it cut just because it
went out in the family. As for the survey, that may be true but I want respect for who I am,
and don`t intend to take advantage of its results. I won`t sell my hair out for greater respect. i
now have longer than average short hair and if I ever grow it long, I WON`t cut it for greater
respect.
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Sarah2 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 16 2002 at 1:00pm
Tina,

I hope you`re not really going to cut your son`s hair. Too much effort has gone into getting it to his waist. Kids don`t understand the finality of cutting 5-6 years of growth. Please reconsider, you won`t be sorry.

Sarah
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Ashley View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 16 2002 at 8:56pm
Tina,

I totally agree with Sarah. You should wait at least a few months. Long hair is easy to cut, but so hard to grow back. I think both of you will be sorry if it is cut right now.

Ashley
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chip View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 17 2002 at 6:16pm
I think its just fine for boys and men for that matter to have long hair. My hair is long and has been since I was little. What happened to me was I was forced once by a stylist to have mine cut short. Ever since then I have a hard time not only trusting stylists but people as well.
Chip
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Jo View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 19 2002 at 3:59pm
Dear Tina,

I totally agree with Sarah and Ashley; it would be a big mistake to cut it now. I went thru a similar crisis with my 11 year old daughter last summer. She had beautiful waist length blonde hair that I just loved. Two of her soccer teamates had gotten short haircuts, and she was bugging me to let her get a similar style. After about a month I finally gave in. She did look cute, but she was so much prettier with it long. It only took two days for her to realize what a huge mistake she made. She cried herself to sleep for a week. Even now when we see a girl with long blonde hair she will get real sad. It sounds like your son likes his hair long. Cutting it for just family or peer pressure is the wrong reason. You need to have a long talk with him and remember, you are the mom, and you know best. Does he wear it in a braid for school. I bet he is a real cutie with it down. Maybe you have already made your decission, but I really hope you let it grow.

Jo
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wedgecutdude View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 19 2002 at 5:51pm
I think you should listen to Jo and wait a couple
more years. The shock of losing so much hair at
one time could really upset him.

The last thing you want is for him to develop a fear
of hair salons or anything resembling them (eg.
buildings with dark tinted windows and mirrors).


- Wedgecutdude
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wedgecutdude View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 19 2002 at 5:52pm
I think you should listen to Jo and wait a couple
more years. The shock of losing so much hair at
one time could really upset him.

I had the same experience as chip.
The last thing you want is for him to develop a fear
of hair salons or anything resembling them (eg.
buildings with dark tinted windows and mirrors)
and have to desperately search for a stylist who
does home visits.


- Wedgecutdude
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Waggy View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 19 2002 at 8:52pm
For GAWDS SAKE people - hair is verrrrry personal - noone should mess with anyone else`s hair against their wishes PERIOD...wags
Be yourself - unless you suck...wags
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 20 2002 at 3:07pm
Hi Tina,
Isn`t today your son`s birthday? What have you decided to do? Don`t keep us in suspence. My girls go to daycare with a darling little 5 yr old boy who hasn`t had his hair cut yet; just trims. His mom is probably going thru many of the same problems that you are dealing with. Mainly, "the what a pretty little girl" comments. He is in kindergarten now, but she is thinking about cutting it when he starts first grade. I am going to tell you the same thing I told her. Dont`t you dare cut it. You will be very sorry. Please post again and let us know what you decided.

Dawn
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 21 2002 at 4:31am
I would have loved to have had long hair - but where I grew up in Scotland it was frown upon, especially at school where you were MADE to have hair that was `clear cut of the collar line, short and near`.

People don`t seem to take guys with long hair too seriously - this is very wrong, come on just because they grow their hair long it doesn`t mean they`re any less intelligent or able than someone whith short hair - in fact it shows true dedication I think!

I wish I had long hair.
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LaDawn View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 21 2002 at 11:11pm
Wow! you ask for opinions and didn`t you get a great variety. For me I can`t stand long hair on a guy. In our continual srive for equality for each sex; it would be nice for something to relate to a womans femininity. In my opinion it seems the whole world is going for a unisex type of system and it would be nice for certain qualities to belong to a certain sex. So as for me, my son will not have long hair as long as I am making the decisonsl. When it comes time for him to become a man, then I have to let him make decisions for himself. If it isn`t againt any religious or family beliefs, then pick your battles.
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Rachel B. View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 21 2002 at 11:53pm
many ppl have opinions & mine is NO long hair on guys but it depends on what u want & many ppl have opinions so u wont get a same answer.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 22 2002 at 6:41pm
If a mother thinks long hair on guys doesnt look good or whatever, that is not reason to not let your son grow his hair out. You should let them grow it out if they want to. They want to express themselves, don`t hold them back from that.
Now are you going to let your son grow his hair long?
I will tell you one thing, If you don`t let him, he`s either going to be REALLY mad at you for it, or just rebel.
What YOU like doesn`t matter, it`s what HE likes. If he wants to grow his hair long, that`s HIS descion.
That`s the way I see it.
Long, red, slightly wavy hair. Trying to go grow very long! It`s about 3.75in. from my belt now :)
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RedHead View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 22 2002 at 6:49pm
Oh
All of my freinds have long hair, including my boyfreind. They are the smartest people I know, seriously. So I don`t think that the longhair=less intelligent thing is true. Your son is probably the shy sensitive type, he loves music? He probably is very intellectual, with a great sense of humor.
Well, I don`t know, that`s just what I am guessing hehe.
Long, red, slightly wavy hair. Trying to go grow very long! It`s about 3.75in. from my belt now :)
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Tina View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 22 2002 at 6:54pm
Hi again,

Thanks everyone for all the support. Most of you will be glad to know that I have decided not to cut Robbie`s hair any time in the near future. I have been using a new shampoo and conditioner on it for about a month and I can really see a differance, especially his ends. We celebrated his birthday on saturday, and I trimed his bangs a little, but I didn`t have to do anything to his ends. I`m really excited to see how much below the waist I can get it. Of course family reaction has been mixed, but I think that to keep it growing is best for now. Thanks again.

Tina
that is a hair DON'T
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duke View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 23 2002 at 9:03am
That`s good, Tina, so long as you are prepared to let him cut it if he wants it cut. You should start
emotionally preparing yourself for that - you`ve put yourself in the situation of being attatched to
someone else`s hair. Many spouses have had to deal with their significant other making whatever change
they wanted to their hair. And you`re the mom, you should really be understanding if he wants it off.
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Dawn View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 26 2002 at 10:37am
Tina,

I`m so glad that you`re going to keep Robbie`s hair long. I can see him in my mind, and how adorable he looks. Was it difficult to convince him to keep it , or did your have to use a little "mom knows best" advice? Do you have a new goal in mind for his length? How do the other kids treat him? Sorry about all the questions, but I`m really interested. Little boys with long hair are just so cute.

Dawn
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Tina View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 27 2002 at 8:21pm
Dawn,

Thank you so much for your positive interest in my son`s hair. I don`t always get such nice comments. I don`t mind your questions at all, usually people aren`t as nice as you. Actually it wasn`t a big deal convincing Robbie to keep his length. I just said that we have worked so hard to get it this long, and it would be a shame to cut it. I let him read some of the posts you guys made ( thanks Jo) , and that really helped. The kids at school are just wonderful; he goes to a Montessori school, and they arre taught to accept individual differences. The problems that he has usually are from strangers who natually think he is a girl. He is OK with it most of the time, but I know it hurts. I don`t have a new goal in mind; I just want it to get longer, and to have him love it as much as I do.

Tina
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