Color Confusion

I highlighted my naturally dark brown hair (about a level 4 or 5, I think) for four years, going progressively blonder. I got lots of compliments, but it seemed like I needed to highlight more and more often to get rid of dark roots. I asked my stylist of four years to put in lowlights but she insisted that I wouldn't like it and that it would be very hard to go back blonde.

Long story short, I switched stylists and tried lowlights. My hair ended up with about five shades of highlight - even my mother said it looked like a mess. So . . . I decided to try an all-over auburn shade. Not knowing much about all-over color I didn't know to ask about semi v. demi v. permanent, and she used permanent color.

I have spent the last six months trying to get the auburn out of my hair. It was too drastic of a change for me. I've had several rounds of highlights, but I still have lots of red and my hair is super dark.

How can I find a happy "medium" blonde? I don't want to do all-over dye or bleach. I'd be happy with highlights every two months, like I used to have.

Sorry to run on, but I can't figure out why it is so hard to go blonde again.

Thanks, Susan - I appreciate your reply and it sounds like this might not be as difficult as I thought. I am going let my hair grow out a little more and then try again for the color.