QuoteReplyTopic: I want short hair so much! Posted: March 28 2006 at 10:11am
I need help. I currently have long, thick hair that goes over my shoulders. I'm desperately wanting a change so I have decided I want it chopped off - cut just under the chin with layers or something. I think I will suit it and I love the idea of a change.
Unfortunately the problem is trying to get my mum to approve. I know that sounds pathetic. I'm 16 so I should be able to have what I want really. But she loves my long hair and she will hate the idea of me wanting it short. It's so annoying. What do I do? :[ Please help! x
I had the same problem the first time I got the short hair bug. My mother was generally opposed to the idea. I was able to talk it out with her and afterwards she was OK with it. It helps that we have a pretty good relationship. As I recall, our conversation went something like this:
Me: Why can't I get my haircut?
Mom: You have such lovely hair it would be ashame to cut it off.
Me: So you think I'd be ugly without my long hair?
Mom: No no no, you'd be beautifull regardless it's just that . . .
Me: So you're saying you'll love me just as much without my long hair?
Mom: Of course, I'm just worried you'll regret it.
Me: So you're trying to protect me from making a decision I'll regret?
Mom: Yes - that is about right.
Me: Thanks Mom. It's sweet that you want to protect me. But don't you always say we grow from our mistakes? Either I'll like it or I'll learn something in the process - It's just hair.
Mom: That's true. Are you sure you want to do this?
Me: Yeah. And can I get a tatoo?
Mom: NO!
katay
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When I was your age I had experimented some with my hair and my mom never really cared. She changes her style a lot with new cuts and color. However my grandmother always hated to see me with short hair.
I think you should explain to your mom that you do not think you are defined by your hair. It is your posession, and you should be free to try new styles. Just explain this in a non-confrontational way and be sure to not take an attitude with her. Show her some pictures of what you want, so she sees it is not a wild style. If she still says "NO", tell her that you do not plan to live your life attached to your long hair, but for now you have no choice but to respect her authority so you hope she gets some satisfaction from looking at your long hair. After all, your hair is existing for her sole benefit.
If she says anything else, just tell her she won. This should make her start thinking about what she is doing. Good luck!
Rosalie
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Totally disagree with UFOKommando. You don't have to respect your parent's authority and every children/parent unit must clash at some stage. When I saw you suggesting she, a teenager, should actually say "I repsect your authority", that bothered me a lot. What on earth are you trying to turn her into? There's just as many "fake grown ups" as there are "fake rebels", and I know which is healthier. I prefer taking logical ideas over "don't question my authority", as should everyone., and teenagers are going through a stage when they're exploring that idea. There is no logical reason why she should not cut her hair. There are some reasons against it, but nothing strong enough to say that she absolutely mustn't without her mother's permission. Maybe now that you're older you don't remember that.
To the OP, Keep in mind that a lot of people giving you advice here will be parents who've gotten bitten by social conservatism as they're the "Last generation.
Your hair is YOUR hair, not hers. It's unfortunte she prefers it long, but she shouldn't be dictating something so personal for you. It's part of you, so it means a lot more to you to have it the way you want than it does to her. She has to learn that she can't control people like that.
Edited by Rosalie
ragdollragdoll
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When I was growing up my grandmother on my dad's side always said to cut it short. When I did cut it short when I was a kid she loved it and I hated it. When I have my hair is long which is shoulder length now she wanted me to cut it short because I have such a beautiful face why do I want to hide it behind all that hair. I am growing my hair long .
This is your decision and nobody else can make this decision for you. Try to compromise with your mom on what length will be good for you in the short family. That way you and her can agree upon. I hope this helps. Best of Luck.
This sounds all to familiar, A clients duaghter in her young teenns came into my shop wth a friend and she asked for a short boyish cut. Her mom was in the day before and I knew that her daughter would be in the next day to get a cut. Now she had hair that was one length & mid back. Her mom asked if I would do a shoulder length bob. When Traci asked for a short boyish haircut I was puzzled. Of course the first question was, does your mom aprove. Of course she said yes, I called her mom and asked prior to cutting and she had no knowledge of this and we just went with the bob. To keep her and her mom happy they agreed on going with a length of just above the shoulders. Her freind the next week came in with her mom to get cuts and both her and mom had gotten new looks for spring. Moms do play a big roll at times when it comes to hair. Don't know why but they just do and I have no problem with that.Before I would cut long hair short lets be sure that we are all in agrement with it. Hair does not grow back over nigth as we wish it could and I can uderstand the clash but at what age?
While I am a parent of "tween" girls, so not to the teenager stage quite yet.... I say just go and do it. Of course, you should pay for it. 16 is that time that you should be making some of those decisions on your own. Sounds like your mom is having a hard time giving up that parental control.
I think you should do it - explain that you listened to your mom's advice but that you felt very strongly about this - then throw in "Hey, at least I didn't get a tatoo!" (that was great bronnie)
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Ha! I Love that at the end about wanting a tattoo!!! LOL!!!
UFOKommando wrote:
