QuoteReplyTopic: How do i .... Posted: November 06 2006 at 3:41pm
Have you girls ever run into this problem:
My bestest friend in the world is white and its sometimes hard to get her to understand the concept that my hair and her hair are different because they are of differing textures...for example halloween she asked could we both go as cats and put glitter gel in our hair well i know that stuff isnt good for your hair and I had just washed my hair the day b4...she just couldnt understand why i couldnt just this once wash my hair two times in a row...i had to then explain about hair texture and oils and stuff she really did try to understand but i dont think she got it.....i recently spent the night at her house she and her mom couldnt understand why i had to sleep on my satin pillow case instead of the cotton ones.....and finally she asked me when i went to shower if the shampoo they had was alright for my hair i told her yes i can use the same kind as you lol....i mean shes a really sweet girl(thats why shes my bestest friend) but its hard to get her to understand the concept of " i cant wash my hair everyday because my hair doesnt produce as much oil as yours" ....or i have to get my hair relaxed this weekend thats how i get it so straight lol....do any of you have this issue ? If so how do you handle it?
cmesweet
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No I never have these issues...I really don't talk about hair with my friends of various ethnicities. However, when or if I do speak on hair I speak based on MY hair routine and do not group all African-americans and their hair routines together.
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BC May 9, 2004
TwinkletOes23
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Well I havent gone through that..but you have tried to explain the texture difference to her, which is the main reason. Since she still does not understand it doesn't hurt to do some research for her if she really want a better understanding. Otherwise I;m not sure whatelse to advise. Just my 2 cents. HTH
I understand how you must feel. I don't discuss hair with my friends of other races because it makes me feel uncomfortable. They have such different hair care practices that in my experiences they find ours to be "out of the norm". I see how uncomfortable they get in the black hair care section.....like their afraid to touch anything or even look at it too hard, lol.
I went to school with this white girl that once told a group of black girls that she heard we all used chicken grease in our hair. I can tell that some of them do a lot of talking and making fun of our hair care behind our backs.
Once again, these are just my experiences.
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CHICKEN GREASE lol thats a new one nah shes never said anything like that shes just confused when she buys all her friends shampoo gift sets for xmas and has to go to look for a different one for me which we have solved i told her to get me a nexxus gift set 4 xmas lol
many of us are still learning about OUR hair, so imagine how different all of it this is to other races.
i recently became freinds with a native american (she has very straight
black hair). she was raised around caucasians all of her
life. recently we went to the mall and we passed by a hair care
place. i mentioned to her that i am growing my hair long and
tucking the ends away and trying to keep my roots manageable. she
said, "i do not have the slightest clue about black hair and never gave
it any thought."
i told her that our hair is curly and some of us straighten our
roots. when she saw my daughter's hair after i hot-combed it, she
was shocked and said, "i never thought black women could grow their
hair long," since we all talk about weave so much.
i tried to explain it to her (mainly about shrinkage) but she refused to wrap her brain around
it. so, i just left it alone. for me, i will SHOW her by simply wearing
it down every now and then.
i recently showed up at a birthday party with my hair down, and her
husband commented on how nice it was. i caught her looking at it but she
never said anything, the entire night. maybe she is
uncomfortable now, and even though i do not think she meant to be
malicious, but i will disprove her notion of our hair.
our skin, cultures, foods, and yes, hair are different. these are the
things that makes the world an interesting place. difference is,
she ain't my bestest freind, so i do not feel compelled to make her
understand. if you do, give her the research, pics of different
types, and then, leave it alone. we like each other's company, so the hair thing shall remain...unspoken
Edited by LadyEsquire - November 08 2006 at 7:28pm
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i told her yes i can use the same kind as you lol....i mean shes a really sweet girl(thats why shes my bestest friend) but its hard to get her to understand the concept of " i cant wash my hair everyday because my hair doesnt produce as much oil as yours" ....or i have to get my hair relaxed this weekend thats how i get it so straight lol....do any of you have this issue ? If so how do you handle it?
. I can tell that some of them do a lot of talking and making fun of our hair care behind our backs. 
