wanna fix my messed up hair.. HELP ME

....... i`m an asian guy. i need some tips, suggestions. i`ve got really hard, volumous hair. its POOFY and it looks like an afro after about 3 weeks. but its straight hair.. not currly like black peoples hair... since i was little i`ve had the same hair cut. buzz the sides all the way down. buzz the top down somewhat but not all the way, its somewhat rounded to match the actual shape of my head... anyways i`m sick of it.. i`ve finally decided i wanna do something about it. what can i do? i`m not sure where to start so i surfed around and found this message board... figured i`d try n see what i can do myself.. and if no good maybe i`ll have to hit the salon..........

so what i`d like to know is... are there any products that will make my hair more stylable... i`ve tried using different shampoos and conditioners with no effects... hair spray/mouse are worthless and gel will hold it while but eventually it will pull back somewhat straight.. and look really bad.. so is there something that`ll loosen up my hair so i can style it a little easier?

i forgot to add that the hair is pretty thick too..

thanks for any help