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Long hair is a psychological feel-good

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Category: The HairTalk® Archives
Forum Name: Hair Talk Archive
Forum Description: All the old Hair Talk Messages...
Printed Date: October 07 2022 at 11:16am

Topic: Long hair is a psychological feel-good
Posted By: Christine
Subject: Long hair is a psychological feel-good
Date Posted: January 12 2000 at 2:42am
I read with interest Brandee's dilemma. Sharing a similar experience, I believe having long healthy, hair can really make a person feel good about themselves because they know they are looking and feeling great. Not to mention the compliments one gets! This is a psychological factor that most short-haired people don't seem to understand or empathise (in my experiences). I wonder if such people are secretly envious? Thereupon they constantly wonder aloud about the inconvenience and maintenance involved in the upkeep of long hair. Actually, the high cost of salon hair products we use is offset by the low cost of maintaining long hair. And we know the results are worth every cent!On the other hand, I am constantly being made to feel bad about my decision to keep long hair and hate it when criticised by short haired people around me. Comments on the frizziness of my hair (through no fault of mine but the humid climate's) really get me down as I try everything possible to tame it. Most days, my environment (in every sense of the word) really gets me thinking about whether to chop it all off! That would reduce all the hassles of dryness, frizziness, etc. and criticisms.I am considering cutting my past-shoulder length hair into a mouth-length bob. Judging from the responses to Brandee's message, I agree that it's our own hair, not other's so we can do what we like with it and feel comfortable. But is it really worth it to put up with all the nastiness and comments from people who like short hair? Would anyone talk me out of cutting it short?Long-hair fans of the world, unite!!

Posted By: Dawn
Date Posted: January 12 2000 at 2:43am
Here's a funny story for you Christine. When I was young my mother would literally drag me to get my hair cut. I grew up during a time when long hair was not only "in" it was mandatory if you wanted to be cool. No one I knew had short hair, and I longed, nay, anguished over being forced to cut mine. I hated myself, hated to look in the mirror and I hated my mother for tormenting me. She would say it was for my own good, my face was too fat for long hair, blah, blah, blah, pick any lame excuse short haired people use for why you should cut your hair. Well, recently my mom came to visit. I hadn't seen her in about 10 years. I haven't cut my hair in twenty years. Everywhere we went, stores, restaurants, at the beach, I do mean everywhere, at least one person and usually two or more during the course of our trip would come right up to me and tell me how lovely my hair was and how much they admired it. This is a regular routine for me, its been happening for years now, but my mothers jaw dropped nearly every time it occurred. I worked it more than usual, chatting about hair tips, offering the Hair Boutique web address, discussing and encouraging as each encounter warranted. My mother said nothing about these encounters, not one word the whole visit, but I know she felt those comments even more deeply than I did and I think for the first time ever was finally forced to accept how much a part of me my hair truly is. Toward the end I think it actually made her mad when people would compliment me. Did I enjoy that? You bet I did! I know it was wrong but I loved every minute of it. Some people don't want you to have that power. It makes them feel insecure. Don't let those people sway you. If you want long hair, you go for it. Try some products just for curly hair, read all Karen's advice, do whatever it takes if long hair is what you want. My long hair heals a part of me that words can't even explain. I don't wear it this way for the attention, its an unavoidable consequence, but the ego strokes can really make your day and all the negative comments will fade into the obscurity they deserve. Accept the hairstyle choices that your friends make as their personal perogative and let them know in no uncertain terms that you expect the same courtesy in return. Long hair isn't for everyone, but neither is short hair and you have a right to your own preference. Exercise that right without guilt, its a very special thing.Good luck with your hair!Very best wishes to all!Dawn