does your beautician totally control
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Category: African American Hair
Forum Name: African American Hair
Forum Description: Devoted to the special needs of African Americans.
URL: https://talk.hairboutique.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=54293
Printed Date: July 27 2025 at 8:14am
Topic: does your beautician totally control
Posted By: femmemuscle
Subject: does your beautician totally control
Date Posted: July 02 2007 at 10:26am
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I went to this beautician for the first time for texturizer, and cut...we both came up with a hairstyle that's nice for my face, that is very quick to do with low maintenance..needless to say.. it's the only style i've been wearing since i've gone to her...if we try something else, it will require more cutting/layering, ugh..
i have so much information from the forums, and books..and a lot of products that i have used to maintain a healthy head of hair on my own..
when we first consulted, she said i would have to see her every week for a wash and set..(so far, i think i only need her for touch ups....and that's every 6 months)...
when i saw her the first week, she realized that i can maintain my own hair...but said i should see her every two weeks..for a wash and set...maybe she's being cautious?
if my hair was jacked? this i can understand...but you know what? i was doing very well maintaining my own hair by myself..
do some of you ladies see your beautician every week? for every little thing?
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |
Replies:
Posted By: Divavocals
Date Posted: July 05 2007 at 1:08pm
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I have moments where i feel like pampering myself.. So I will go to my stylist once every two weeks to pamper myself (wash/condition/style).. Otherwise I go only for those services that I can't/don't want to do myself.. This includes my weaves and most chemical services.. Since I've made a decision not to relax for a while (6+ post relaxer on my leave out areas for my weave, and over 2+ years for the rest of my hair) I go see my stylist for my weaves and color.. Though I have gotten bold with all of the information I've gotten on these forums, and for my last install, I did my own perm color. (I had to wash that grey right outta my hair!!! ------------- Check out the 5th So Cal offline luncheon?? For more info: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com/lunch.html Links to my fav vendors & hair albums + Weave 101 information: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com |
Posted By: digitaldiva
Date Posted: July 06 2007 at 1:03pm
Sometimes the good stylist just want to make sure that your hair is staying on a healthy track. This ensures that you don't get any breakage and things. Then again she could be an evil stylist and the come every week story is just a salesjob to get more money out of you. Sorry, I'm really starting to dislike stylist! lol  ------------- AS OF 5/25/2007 4A 10 1/2' in the top 10 on the sides 3 1/2 in the back GOAL BSL |
Posted By: Divavocals
Date Posted: July 08 2007 at 2:41pm
 ------------- Check out the 5th So Cal offline luncheon?? For more info: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com/lunch.html Links to my fav vendors & hair albums + Weave 101 information: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com |
digitaldiva wrote:Posted By: femmemuscle
Date Posted: July 09 2007 at 2:08am
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yeah..i was beginning to wonder about the "come every week story" myself...
i've never had even "evil" stylist give me that story...i think she is concerned about my hair maintenance..
but i will say this...doesn't matter how many times i show up, i always walk out of there with the same hairstyle. Just a different way of doing them...One week, we did a blow dry/flat iron spirals, and pin-up style
the following week, we did a roller set, and the same pin up hair style..this time with a bit more body, and a little more frizz..
i'm afraid of her cutting my hair, so we just curl it into an updo with the curls falling over to one side..it's cute, quick, and predictable..
after talking with her, i have this gut instinct, that she would be the one to hack off all of my hard-earned hair, and say, "Oh, don't worry, it'll grow back"..i don't have the face to pull off stylists mistakes like you beautiful ladies on the forum..
Digital, i understand what you're saying: "Once bitten, twice shy"...
Diva, you're very talented!! i tried to leave maybe 1/4 width of hair out while wearing a weave..my last beautician gave me the worst information, and i wound up burning it off - trying to match the weave..(pressing almost everyday)..your hair must blend in perfectly..you're very lucky there is no processing (chemical or heat) involved to attain that look...
i had an "evil" beautician..
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |
Posted By: digitaldiva
Date Posted: July 09 2007 at 7:35am
Good Morning All!! I hope everyone had a good 2007 4th of July weekend! I'm curious. What makes you think your stylist will chop off your hair if given the opportunity? ------------- AS OF 5/25/2007 4A 10 1/2' in the top 10 on the sides 3 1/2 in the back GOAL BSL |
Posted By: femmemuscle
Date Posted: July 09 2007 at 1:14pm
hey, good morning to you, too, Miss Diva.
i call it gut instinct..this woman is very good at teaching hair color, perms, all types of great things on caucasion women..studied in London, England..i think a haircut on my head would be a "challenge" for her? but i also think she knows if she screws up - then it's "light's out" for her..
after seeing so many beauticians ...i've learned to trust my instincts...she's very confident about doing weaves, texturizers, perms, etc..and brags about her craft very confidently...
but when she sees my head floating through that door, she doesn't speak very confidently about cutting it..my hair in it's natural state, or without heat is very thick..but in the texturized state, it's fine...the crown is long, but very thin, and the back is bushy.. and i have a big head..
i don't think she can figure out a style for my face..and with these muscles, plus my ex-boxing background, i think she knows what i might do if she does screw up my hair...
she always "shy's away" from talking about cutting my hair..so, i take that as my "queue" ...
Long time ago..One woman in La Jolla, CA, screwed up my hair..and she knew it..the moment i stood to truly examine it in the mirror..she dropped her equipment, ran into the bathroom, and locked the door..
Her name was Francoise Toussant, she told me that "Great Lengths" was the best thing for black hair..when she yanked/took the extensions out, my APL hair came out with them..she was too cheap to pay for the equipment and the solvents that melt the glue from my hair..
Asian Women have done the same thing to my hair, that your beautician did to yours, more hair loss due to people who think they know their craft, and are learning about our hair - just as we are..
Yes, I have had several of them, a couple of hispanics, and quite a few AA women, take off running when they found i wasn't happy with my haircut, or relaxer...
it always grew back..but i've learned over the years..when you see them "hesitate" or a certain "look", trust your instincts..no matter how much they "brag"...
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |
Posted By: digitaldiva
Date Posted: July 09 2007 at 2:14pm
Took off running?!! LMFAO! OMG! I'm sorry... wooo... I can't believe it. I just had this picture in my head! haha! The things we have gone through with hair stylist. In the end we just have to laugh to keep our sanity, I guess. I just don't want to experiment with stylist anymore, but I don't know how else to clip my ends and keep the style of my bob. I've found one that is able to give me a great relaxer. I let her trim my ends once. It looked decent, but she charged me $30! Just to Dust my ends! $70 for a re-touch and $30 for the reconstructor. So, at this point, I have about 3 stylist that I am considering. Sorry to go off on a tangent here. Stylist #1 is the one that cut my hair off. I know I know... But she's been doing my hair for 13 years, and when she does do a good job, which is about 90% of the time, it looks nicer than any stylist I've ever been to. Then, there is a stylist #2 at a salon called V'sions here in Norcross. This stylist did my rollersets before I found out about my $9 Beauty School. She's never given me a re-touch. She seems like she may be able to trim my ends without chopping my hair off. She says black women can't keep long hair because every so often, we want a "style". We should just keep trims and not worry about keeping a particular style if we're trying to maintain length. Pretty good concept. Stylist #3 is really not an option. I refuse to go to Salon D'Lor in south Atlanta and pay $160 to get all of my hair services done. It didn't even look that good. So, it comes down to this. I'd absolutely loved the style that I had before the big chop and I want it back. But how much of my hair has to be cut NOW to get the old style back? Hmm..! lol Sorry for rambling off!! I bet I sound like a crazy person. ------------- AS OF 5/25/2007 4A 10 1/2' in the top 10 on the sides 3 1/2 in the back GOAL BSL |
Posted By: Divavocals
Date Posted: July 09 2007 at 3:08pm
What a sweet thing to say.. Girl there is no processing because I either wear a closure or EPRT.. That way I can keep my hair as heat and chemical free as possible.
Girl you have been through some hair trials and tribulations haven't you??!!! Sounds like you might be on to a decent stylist this time.. I hope this stylist will keep you happy & beautiful. We don't want her running into the bathroom .. ------------- Check out the 5th So Cal offline luncheon?? For more info: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com/lunch.html Links to my fav vendors & hair albums + Weave 101 information: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com |
Posted By: femmemuscle
Date Posted: July 11 2007 at 8:04pm
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Hey ladies! yep..I know, Digital diva..it does sound funny...you may laugh, but man! at the time? i was dead serious..APL length didn't take me very long to grow, but all it took was less than an hour? and it was gone...and so was the damn beautician...all i could see when I looked in the mirror at my hair? was their fat butts jiggling toward a door with a good lock.. Yes, Diva, i think i have seen it all..done it all...gawd knows..but through these lessons, i have learned to be more upfront, or verbal with beauticians..Since i was a kid, and we were poor, i was taught to "take what you get, be grateful and don't ask questions"..this type of upbringing keeps me humble, but also has gotten me into a lot of problems with "paid services".. I don't exactly "demand" quality, at this time...but i've learned to shy away from people places and things that aren't acceptable to my standards. Then, of course, occasionally, i get "taken in" - just like everyone else.. but learn from it..and yes, i still maintain my stance. Divavocal, you are truly amazing and know your stuff..i wish i had a beautician who could do weaves correctly, i'd still be wearing one.. Okay, digital..Stylist #1 cut your hair off..damn..after 13 years..i am very sorry..you would think she would give you your money back, out of remorse, alone.
Stylist #2? i like her concept, and yes, we want a style, just like any other culture..i have yet to see a caucasion, asian, or any woman go to the stylist and say "I just want have my hair washed, and conditioned - but don't style it" ..Sorry, but i'd like to look my best..i think you would agree..styles are nice, which is why we go to beauticians or "stylists"...i agree with her, yes..but for those of us, who must venture out into the public on a daily basis? - a style would be nice...:)
#3 $160.00 is a lot of money..really..and i totally agree with you. for that amount of money, i should not only have a great style, but Vin Diesel to go with it..(he's my fantasy hunk - and he's gay, he's claiming "bisexual", just like Elton John, Ricky Martin, Rock Hudson, John Vandam, Hayden Christensen, Doogy Houser, George Michael, etc. then later? they claim they're "ACTUALLY" gay)
And no...you're not rambling..and you don't sound crazy..are you thinking about getting it cut again by stylist #1 to grow it back?
Diva Vocals, i just came out of weaves...my hair seems "thin" for now? but my beautician said in 6 months, i should see a big difference in my scalp, and hair thickness..she said my hair is learning how to be "out" after several years..it makes sense...don't you think?
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |
Posted By: Divavocals
Date Posted: July 12 2007 at 12:38pm
Girl I feel so bad you've had so many bad experiences.. If you ever come down to So Cali, I'll hook ya up with some of my fav stylists!!
 My fav non-weave stylist was Jackie.. Jackie was my stylist for years until I decided I wanted to wear weaves again.. (Jackie doesn't do weaves..) When I was with Jackie, my hair stayed healthy, and Jackie would NEVER butcher anyone's hair with scissors..
Aww girl you are too sweet..
 Don't give up on weaves yet girlie.. Have you tried checking out Craigslist or your local BSS?? Many of the BSS's in my area keep all kinds of stylist cards and flyers on hand. I found one of my weave stylists via the BSS.. My current stylist advertises in Craigslist.. (though I found her through a BHM member I trust) As much as you've been through girl, I KNOW you know what to screen for..You sound like you've got a good stylist now.. You hair may seem thin now, but I think over time it won't seem as thin to you.. From what you've described in past posts, you've got thick hair like me.. Girl believe me, we could NEVER have thin hair!
 ------------- Check out the 5th So Cal offline luncheon?? For more info: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com/lunch.html Links to my fav vendors & hair albums + Weave 101 information: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com |
Posted By: femmemuscle
Date Posted: July 13 2007 at 12:16am
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well, i first wondered when the L.A. times caught him partying in a transvestite bar at 2:00 a.m., with no shirt on..great pics, those guys(girls) were all over him..
then when he was interviewed on a radio station while promoting "Chronicles of Riddick", the djay point blank asked him...Vin's reply was "why would you ask me that?" "why would you say that?".he kept saying this several times, but never answered the question..
Then he was asked on a t.v. interview, and he just said "I'm desirable to both men AND women." which doesn't means he "desires" men and women.. I watched him as he hosted a "Behind the scenes" show of "Chronicles of Riddick"...my "gaydar" went off..
something's just not right..if you ask a straight man if he's gay..he'd probably slug the reporter, or just flat out say "no"..He and Ricky Martin did the same tactic, whine, backpaddle, and choosing their words..
My intuitive sense is, he's gayor bisexual..the man is so good looking, i'm sure everybody wants a piece of him..including me..
 Thanks for the tips!!! i used to live in Southern California..at that time about 15 -20 years ago, there weren't very many good AA stylists in San Diego..i hope things have changed..There were quite a few in L.A., but the traffic cut my visits to a minimum. Northern CA, doesn't have very many good stylists, mostly asians..or braiders..
Tell me what you think of this shop in Northern, CA...they have a photo gallery of their work of weaves, ever heard of them? http://www.serendipityhairsalon.com - www.serendipityhairsalon.com .. over in the upper right hand corner, there are links..(small) click the one that says "photo gallery"..
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |
Posted By: Divavocals
Date Posted: July 13 2007 at 11:26am
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Funny you should ask about Serendipity Salon.. I was just looking at their site yesterday! I would check them out.. I am impressed with what I see so far.. They certainly do nice layered cuts! Have you called them to interrogate.. I mean interview them yet??
I can't imagine that Oakland doesn't have a number of African American stylists.. I would checkout the BSSs that cater to African American customers.. You might find that they have stylists cards or flyers or even recommendations.. ------------- Check out the 5th So Cal offline luncheon?? For more info: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com/lunch.html Links to my fav vendors & hair albums + Weave 101 information: divahairtalk.overthehillweb.com |
Posted By: femmemuscle
Date Posted: July 14 2007 at 7:24pm
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No, Oakland probably has a lot of AA stylists, but they aren't what i would call "quality"..the last hell hole i went into was called "Diapason"..i found out later, they were african women..who can't stand us anyway..
they absolutely had no clue about hair or styling it, and they were doing braids on a client using some cheap cat hair - pretty scary..this is also the third or fourth place that i went to in Oakland over the years, that watered down their hair products..
A few women whom i have seen with weaves in this area, looked as if they were wearing wigs..i certainly would not take a recommendation from them..i've had a few of THOSE types of weaves myself..
I've had my hair out for about 4 weeks now..it was difficult at first, and frustrating...but my boyfriend is noticing a difference in the texture, thickness, as well the styling ability..
I've always liked a carefree style that i could only get with weaves..but now, i do the flexirods at night, and have come up with this cute spiral style..loose spirals all over my head, tapering down to my shoulders..i came up with this style on my own..
doing spirals on lightly texturized hair doesn't work well without heat..in the morning it looks great, but by mid day...my hair swelled up..and the spirals looked more like sausages on my head...i walked into my hair appointment looking like someone scared the sh**t out of me..
When one of the gay beauticians asked "what happened", i told him, "well, this is a style I came up with this morning..believe me, it looks better today, than it did in the past 2 weeks"..
 that embarrassed my beautician enough to get her act together..she did exactly as i had suggested..and now we have a nice hair style..
 i also came up with the "pin up" style that kept frizzing up (also, no heat), and told my stylist, we need to be a bit more creative..this was the only style i could wear for 3 weeks..pin up my nappy/frizzy half-curly spirals to one side..when i was working out in the gym, i was astonished to see them playing "Let's go crazy" by prince..on the video monitors..he was wearing my hairstyle...
I thought "Somebody must be looking at that video, and wondering if that's where i got my inspiration from - this is embarrassing" ..what was worse, i suddenly had a vision of Little Richard...that, too, would be me..
that's when i went for the spiral curl style...and wound up with "sausages" on my head..how many times can you embarrass your beautician into doing something right?
------------- some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. |