Desparate for help! 17mth old.
Printed From: HairBoutique.com
Category: African American Hair
Forum Name: African American Hair
Forum Description: Devoted to the special needs of African Americans.
URL: https://talk.hairboutique.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=68582
Printed Date: January 14 2025 at 6:31am
Topic: Desparate for help! 17mth old.
Posted By: jessica321
Subject: Desparate for help! 17mth old.
Date Posted: May 23 2011 at 10:42am
Hi I am new and living in Ireland. President and Mrs Obama are visiting our country today  . Our whole country is at a standstill for this visit!! Very exciting!Anyway, I desparately need help. I have 2 Ethiopian daughters. Older is 3yrs old and her hair has never been a problem. But my poor youngest daughter is 17 months. Her hair was shaved last sept and it has grown back VERY slowly. But my main problem is that it is matting at the back! I have satin sheet on her cot. I wet her hair and put loads of conditioner in every day before I try to brush it. It is an awful ordeal for her! I litterally end up pulling the head off her. I was using a wide tooth detangling comb but that just was agony. I now have one of these tangle teaser combs and that is definitely easier. But it is still very knotted every day and she cries her little heart out when I comb it. The back is shorter than the front and today for the first time I managed to get it into tiny puffs. Her hair is the tightest, wiry curls I have ever seen. It is desparately dry despite all the conditioner and coconut oil that I use. I only wash her hair with conditioner about once every 3 weeks. 4b or c I think? So my questions: - Is there any moisturiser that I can use? Preferably home made as we cannot get the American brands over here. - Is there a deep conditioning treatment? - Is there anything I can give her vitamin wise to encourage hair growth? She also would have had very poor nutrition for most of her first 12 months of her life. - What age would you use a sleep cap from? I am worried even putting her to bed with the hair bands for the puffs in case she eats them! I am truly desparate for help. If I could just keep managing it till it was longer and then I could hold it while I comb but it is too short and very sore for her to have it combed. She is such a jolly child and the tears just pour when she see the comb coming!! Any advice or help is greatly appreciated. Thanks!
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Replies:
Posted By: CoCoaVixen
Date Posted: July 03 2011 at 10:30am
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Hi Jessica,
you need to wash her hair once a week and brush her hair everyday. To keep it moisturized you need to use products that have a lot of different oils like vitamin e and shae butter. Also when her hair is long enough you might want to find someone who knows how to braid. This will keep her hair healthy and not so "all over the place". Good Luck :)
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Posted By: Karen Shelton
Date Posted: July 04 2011 at 9:42pm
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Hi Jessica,
Thanks for your post. I love Ireland. Spent some time there visiting home of some relatives.
Sorry to hear about your baby. I agree with CoCoaVixen. Great advice. I really don't have anything else to add. ------------- That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger or drives you totally insane. :-) |
Posted By: jessica321
Date Posted: July 05 2011 at 9:21am
Thanks for the replies but I have been doing all of that and braid my older daughter's hair myself. But my younger daughter's hair is so short that I can't hold it while I brush it. I wet it every morning and pump shea butter conditioner into it and then try brushing it with a tangle teezer but just still I end up pulling the head off her to brush it. It is screaming and tears every morning and coconut oil did nothing for her.  So I am at a loss as to what to try now???? Her hair growth is terribly slow and I can't believe how quickly her hair mats. I just feel so sorry for her. If it was long enough to hold it while brushing. I did manage to just about squeeze a few puffs in but she pulls them out as fast as I can put them in!!!
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Posted By: CoCoaVixen
Date Posted: July 05 2011 at 11:43am
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Hey Jessica, I know her hair is very course and it matts easily but wetting her hair everyday is not a good thing. African American hair needs to maintain it's natural oils as well as hold outside conditioners. The shea butter conditioner is a great idea. Because of how slow her hair grows you should keep it in an afro until it's long enough for you to braid. Every night you should make her sleep with a scarf (I know this will be the challenging part) and every morning comb her hair out with a wide tooth comb. If it is matted you need to comb in small sections from ends to roots. I can only imagine what it's like for you when it's time to do her hair. I only know because this is how my hair was. But hair texture changes mine did. |
Posted By: jessica321
Date Posted: July 05 2011 at 3:30pm
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Thanks CoCoaVixen. I will persevere with the shea butter. The sleeping cap will be hard but her older sister wears one so might try the "being big girl like sister" thing!! I know I will manage her hair once it is longer but wishing the days away till it is longer!! I can't believe how slow it is to grow. It was shaved last Sept and is only about 2inches at most on top and 1inch at the back!! I just hate hurting her but determined to keep it unmatted till it gets to a manageable length. My older daughter will get a build up of conditioner after about 2 weeks and I will wash it but my younger daughter never gets this build up. Her hair soaks up every ounze of the conditioner! I often wonder is it just that her hair doesn't absorb it?? Thanks again girls.
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Posted By: Karen Shelton
Date Posted: July 05 2011 at 3:38pm
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Thanks to CoCoaVixen for all her great tips and thanks to Jessica for posting her hair questions. I hope that Jessica will keep us posted on how things go in the future. I know we can all learn from issues like this. CoCoaVixen I would love to hear when your hair texture changed. Do you wear it natural now or do you still braid or do other things? Thanks in advance. ------------- That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger or drives you totally insane. :-) |
Posted By: CoCoaVixen
Date Posted: July 06 2011 at 12:14pm
I'm natural in the terms of i don't use chemicals to straighten my hair but i almost never leave my house without having my hair flat ironed. My hair is long, but it wasn't always this way. when i was younger my hair was very short course and kinky.Then at the age of 15 my hair had a silkier texture to it. and now at 26 my hair doesn't have the tight curls  . my hair is wavy now. I've been told hair texture changes every 7-9 years
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Posted By: Karen Shelton
Date Posted: July 08 2011 at 7:32am
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Hi CoCoaVixen, Thanks for the scoop on your hair. As your hair grew longer did that help flatten out the kinky texture? Do you use a heat protectant before you iron? ------------- That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger or drives you totally insane. :-) |
Posted By: CoCoaVixen
Date Posted: July 08 2011 at 7:56am
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Hi Karen,
No i don't think the length has anything to do with it my younger sister has a very tight kinky curl and her hair is the same length as mine. I don't want to sound like a spokes person but Garnier Fructis sleek and shine product work the best for me. When i first saw the product i thought it was for fine thin hair that gets occasionally frizzy but that is not the case. I was my hair with any generic conditioning shampoo and conditioner. Then i use about a quarter size drop of the garnier fructis sleek and shine smoothing milk. I sit under the dryer until my hair is dry. Then i flat iron my hair with a CHI flat iron. My hair comes out straight, silky, and it smells like heaven. Then i use the Garnier Anti frizz serum so the style last for a week or two. |