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Repost: Relationships and Hair...

Printed From: HairBoutique.com
Category: Hair Talk
Forum Name: Hair Politics
Forum Description: The politics of Hair is a slippery slope...
URL: https://talk.hairboutique.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=8691
Printed Date: February 09 2025 at 12:21am


Topic: Repost: Relationships and Hair...
Posted By: Unregistered Guest
Subject: Repost: Relationships and Hair...
Date Posted: June 11 2001 at 5:57am
I think I put this in the wrong catagory so I`m reposting it here...I`ve seen the debates going on about women cutting their hair despite the protests of their who say they`ll leave if they do it. I agree completely that any man who would threaten to leave their girlfriend or wife if they cut their hair has serious control issues.

So if a man didn`t "Demand" or give any ultimatum, but simply asked if his mate would mind keeping her hair longer because that`s what he was attracted to, would that be more acceptable?

Here`s my standpoint on it. I`m one of those men who has always loved long hair and always will. Please don`t berate me for giving an opinion, but I simply do not find short hair attractive in any way. I am in not saying that short hair is unattractive, I`m just saying I don`t personally like it and I am physically and sexually less attracted to women with short hair.

My girlfriend knows this, and I there was a time when she told me she wanted to cut hers short. I didn`t throw a fit and tell her I would leave her if she did, but I merely explained how much I loved her beautiful head of long blonde hair. She knew I liked long hair, but I don`t think she realized how much I loved hers until then.

She didn`t refuse but instead brought up a good point. About a year earlier tore my ACL. I couldn`t work out or exercise for a good six months. Because of this I gained a little weight around the paunch. She very nicely explained to me that I may be gaining a little too much weight and was starting to look a little oafish. Then she asked me if I would try to lose it and I did with no questions. Since we`ve been together we`ve always taken great strides to try and make each other happy.

These two situations were no different. She remembered what I did for her with no questions and has never thought of cutting her hair since. Some women may think this is totally materialistic, and that I love her only for her hair. Completely untrue. To me she`s the most beautiful woman in the world long hair or not. She knows that I`ll always think she`s BEAUTIFUL even if she was completely bald, just like I know she`ll always think I`m handsome even if I gain 200 pounds. But we try to do everything we can to make eachother happy and to stay ATTRACTIVE to one another. And it works.

After all that, here`s my question. I`ve seen most responses from pro-short haired individuals that say "It`s only hair." If it`s only hair why should it be such a big deal for a woman to leave her hair long if she knows it will make her mate happier? I can understand a single woman cutting her hair and that`s fine, because only she has to deal with the consequences. But once you get serious about someone you`re no longer living your lives just for yourselves, you`re also living them for each other. And that means compromise.

And I know someone is going to pipe up and say "Well if you love her and respect her happiness you`ll compromise and let her cut it because she`ll be happier." Logically it doesn`t make any sense. I can`t all of the sudden become attracted to short hair. I`ll never prefer it over long hair no matter how hard I try.

If she had disregarded my feelings and cut it anyway I would have felt extremely hurt and that my feelings didn`t matter to her. I wouldn`t have broken up with her but it would have been akin to me saying to her "I don`t care if you think I`m getting fat, I`m going to stay this way whether you like it or not." I know she wouldn`t be able to all of the sudden become attracted to someone overweight.

Again to avoid flames I`m going to restress, 1) I don`t think short hair is unattractive in general, it`s just unattractive to me. 2) I would never end a relationship merely because my mate cut her hair.

Just curious what everyone`s opinions would be on this subject.




Replies:
Posted By: duke
Date Posted: June 11 2001 at 11:46am
Reply to message: viewthread.asp?forum=AMB%5FAP121551672&id=3406&page=1#10.3406.1 - 10.3406.1
Makes sense to me. Did you see our lively discussion just a few posts below this one, posted originally
by "Lina" - WOMEN WITH SHORT HAIR AND MEN? It`s interesting.

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