does age matter with long hair?
Printed From: HairBoutique.com
Category: Long Hair Happenings
Forum Name: Long Hair Support
Forum Description: Growing it long takes commitment and support.
URL: https://talk.hairboutique.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=924
Printed Date: September 30 2024 at 6:31am
Topic: does age matter with long hair?
Posted By: gngirl
Subject: does age matter with long hair?
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 3:15pm
| I just turned 33 December of 2003. and my hair is to my bra strap. I love long hair but some people say when you get to be 40 you should go short, why? I was just woundering what everybody else thought about long hair and age. Thanks |
Replies:
Posted By: StyleGuy
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 4:26pm
|
I think things are changing. The way things are currently, short hair for young women in their teens and early twenties is more popular than it has ever been, and longer hair for more mature women is also gaining in popularity. The real trend is toward personal expression where the individual can make decisions independent of traditional rules. ------------- |
Posted By: DMB61
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 7:38pm
| I think women and men should wear their hair what ever length they want, as long as it looks good and is in good condition. I also feel that society has told women how to wear their hair for to long now. That should be up to the person and only that person. not society. |
Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 8:22pm
|
Hi gngirl and DMB61 -- welcome to the board! gngirl... I agree with both StyleGuy and DMB61. Had I had the opportunity to respond first, I probably would have written something along similar lines -- but my words probably would have been a bit more edgy. Well, I'll still go ahead and be blunt... This "rule" is merely a widely-propagated and firmly-held... MYTH! It amazes me how some people willingly accept such ridiculous statements as being some irrefutable truth, and then feel they must abide by its tenets out of entirely misplaced fears. IMO those who feed the myth by advising others to adhere to it ought to be ashamed of themselves. I don't feel strongly about this topic, do I?  ------------- |
Posted By: Kintaro
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 9:31pm
|
Don't wear white after Labor day..... this sounds similar in the fact that it is totally asinine as a rule. Trust me, one project I have is as of the 8th of September, I want to find a suit, and dress in as much fricking white as I can :P Do what you want. It's always more fun that way. ------------- I hate all of the following and lots more : Fundamentalists, racists, sexists, fascists, ageists (people saying seniors = senile , kids = stupid , 18 = immature or a combo of them), and bigots for causes yet to receive their own designation. |
Posted By: gngirl
Date Posted: March 19 2004 at 11:29pm
Thank you! It is nice to know other peoples advice when it comes to long hair. I LOVE LONG HAIR! ------------- |
Posted By: LongBraidz
Date Posted: March 20 2004 at 7:53am
|
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii gngirl...I'am over 40 and I HAD long hair until a week ago! I had to get it cut well...extremely short... because of a chemical "Hair Straightener" screw up (my bad)...but that's another story on another message board. I think it's wrong that society has stereotyped wome over 40 to have short, colored, and permed hair and even worse to have women over 50 with the short, blue, permed hair. Such a negative emphasis on greying hair and age has made women leery about growing their hair long. I do my own thing and march to the beat of my own drummer! It's all about you and your own preference! I'am planning on letting my hair grow back long and to my ankels...and if's it grey...well...it's grey. Life goes on...and I assure you that I don't loose any sleep over what society thinks about me. ------------- "Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair." ~Kahlil Gibran~ |
Posted By: Bob S
Date Posted: March 22 2004 at 2:58pm
|
Gngirl, my wife is almost 44, and she has spectacular hair 3" above her waist now. I, too, had once bought into the nonsense that women over 35 should probably start thinking about going short. My mom had said it so many times that I believed it w/o thinking much about it. After all, before you reach 35, you know that age is never going to come anyway. (lol) So, when Sue first cut her hair short in '96, I accepted it as inevitable. Plus, her pixie looked "cute", so I put the idea of her with long hair on a dusty shelf, never to be considered again. But, a strange thing happened. After a couple years, she decided that she needed enough hair to cover her ears and neck in winter, and a bit to pull oo her face during the summer. Anyway, thanks to my encouragement, it's ALL BAACK! Don't take my word for it. Look around at those women who are older than you, and notice that those who keep their hair well-groomed usually look SO much younger than their same age counterparts who wear the trendy chops. It's not that you are trying to recapture your youth! It's that you wish to remain the sexiest woman you can be, whatever your age. (Aren't those who tell you that you must wear short hair really telling you, "Face it, the bloom is off your rose, so get a short haircut to show you've accepted your new "maturity", i.e., unattractiveness?) Rubbish to them! (lol) Good luck, Bob |
Posted By: Unregistered Guest
Date Posted: March 22 2004 at 3:37pm
| I agree age is no barrier to looking great with long hair. Today I was at the front office of the vacation association office and a women was putting a couple items in her trunk next to me. I said hello and complimented her on her beautiful long hair. She sort of giggled and said thank you very much. I appreciate the compliment. I replied that she must get a lot of compliments on her beautiful hair. She said, " Not really, but mostly on the color". Her hair was near waist length, neatly trimmed and honey blond in color. Well it is lovely I added. She told me she was now forty and she was growing it longer to donate it as a last hurrah as when she gets older it will be arder to grow so long... Then she added she planned to grow it longer, then cut it off to donate to LOL for cancer kids. Her husband was also a very big fan of her long hair but did not want to be selfish if she was giving up to help children with cancer. I mentioned they have a lot of hair sitting in the warehouse and they sell it for wigs to cover expenses as well as wigmaking. She mentioned another person had told her the same, but her female "friends" all are encouraging her to cut it off and "donate it". She said while she really didn't want to cut off her hair because it is part of her and it is a really big deal, she wanted to give of herself to help others. She also mentioned that as she has been getting older her hair has gotten drier and she feared it would thin. I told her I pick up Pantene Pro V for my wife and her hair is still silky soft at 40+, and I cringe at the thought of ever cutting my wife's hair short. It is very OK for women to have long hair and be beautifil after their teens. I told her she seems like a really nice, caring person and I can see how she would want to help others, I think we all do. I mentioned that I give blood a few times a year despite my dislike of needles because I am ) negative, CMV- , and they use the blood for newborn babies. So I bite the bullet, tolerate the needle and give of myself to save a life. She told me she really did not want her hair cut off to pay for staff or utilities. And she mentioned she might consider being a blood donor or volunteering at the hospital. I wished her a good day. She said thank you, really thank you, because I helped her make up her mind not to give up her hair. She became rather esoteric and said there was a reason she was late to her first job in the morning and it was because she was meant to talk to me to help her make her decision not to cut her hair. I told her whether it was devine intervention or random chance, at 40+, she had beautiful hair and no one who is jealous of her hair, should make her feel guilty for keeping it long and beatiful. She mentioned her husband would also be pleased with her decision not to cut her hair off. I told her I was glad to help another husband enjoy the beauty of a great looking wife. She said she could tell I was being kind and honest to her because I had not asked her name, I mentioned my wife and she did not feel I was coming on to her. So in closing, do not be hesitant to complement a lady on her beautiful hair, it really is appreciated. |
Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: March 22 2004 at 6:17pm
Excellent, Bill!  Well done. Bravo! (clap clap clap). Now that's what I call exemplary long hair support! ------------- |
Posted By: gngirl
Date Posted: March 22 2004 at 11:24pm
|
Thank you guys so much for your help.
|
Posted By: duke
Date Posted: March 23 2004 at 3:59am
|
HOGWASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Those "rules" are part of conformist, stale and narrowminded values that I SPIT ON. They can be easily disregarded, remember, THERE IS NO FASHION POLICE! I need not say more, as the previous posts speak for themselves. Oh yeah, Kintaro, that thing about no wearing white after labor day, that's such patent nonsense if you take it seriously. I think it comes from those stodgy times 100 years ago when a gentleman practically had to wear a long sleeved suit even in hot weather (now you know how hot even Quebec can get in August. They must have sweated like horses back then) and they wore white to be a little cooler in the summer. I read that "advice" in the Miss Manners column that was once in the Toronto Star. Now this lady (assuming that it's the same person and indeed a lady) has given various advice over the years, some of which is common sense and some of which is just old-fashioned stodginess. You really nead to take these things critically. ------------- |
Posted By: StyleGuy
Date Posted: March 23 2004 at 12:00pm
LOL. Yes, Dave, why don't you tell us how you really feel? But seriously, I doubt that the `myth' as you refer to it is as widely-propagated or firmly held as you suggest. I know the people on this board represent just a small percentage of the greater population, but isn't it telling that not even one person spoke out in support of the supposed rule? If you're thinking that there are legions of stylists out there whose mission is to convince women to cut their hair short on their 40th or any birthday, I can tell you I've never met one of them. I think that what happens is this. Long hair takes some effort to maintain. At some point, many people decide against making that effort. Some people make that decision in their teens. Others make it in their twenties. And so it may appear that by the time people become 40 or 50, fewer are willing to make the effort to maintain long hair. That doesn't make it a rule. And it doesn't mean you have to follow suit. It's free choice, from what I can see. Some people, locked in their own little world with their own issues, may have objections to your decision. But they don't really matter, do they? ------------- |
Dave Decker wrote:Posted By: Paula
Date Posted: March 23 2004 at 12:21pm
| I think what happens is that sometimes with age, the hair thins out a lot and that's when long hair can age a woman, even if she's very young. Long, very thin hair can really draw attention and overemphasize a person's age, I'm not saying it's always that way, but sometimes it is. |
Posted By: PurpleBubba
Date Posted: March 23 2004 at 6:59pm
|
I pretty much agree with what everyone else has said. No one knows who made that rule so why should it even be considered? I was thinking that maybe this can help, if nature intended for people to have short hair then when they aged it would somehow stop growing or shorten itself. Does this happen? No. Then why should we let what someone who we don't even know tell us that we can't have long hair when our body is still growing it? You wanna know the true meaning of Long Hair? Long Hair is the length of hair that you choose. Its however long You want it. If your hair grows and you want it, keep it. What's next, are bendable elbows gonna go out of style? Are we all gonna have to wear splints to keep our arms from bending? I mean think about it. Its not that much different to say that then it is to say you have to cut your hair because you turned 40 .... or because you gained 30 pounds...... or you are pregnant..... or because someone else did it.... or in my case because you are a male. |
Posted By: earthtones
Date Posted: March 24 2004 at 11:04am
|
I've had shorter hair and I've had really long hair. Hairdresser always suggest cutting when it gets past BS length because they feel it has no style(in other words they can't make as much $$ off you) I think that is changing little by little. I was reading a beauty mag today and it said it doesn't matter your age but you hair type. The article said that people have always been told they are too old for long hair after 35 and women in their twenties shouldn't wear their hair short. They showed examples of famous women in their 20's, 30's,40's,50's and 60's with short-medium-long hair. Some women looked fantastic with short beyond their 30's but quess what, some looked fantastic with long hair. My hair is wavy, thick and coarse anything shorter than just past my shoulders and it bushes out. I need the length to weight it down. And long hair is much easier to care for than shorter hair, it is another myth that long hair= more work. ------------- 21/37.5/42 2C c iii Golden brown, thick, wavy hair It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you've got. ~sheryl crow~ |
Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: March 27 2004 at 12:24pm
Hi Style Guy, I don't understand how you can say that the myth isn't widely propagated and firmly-held. Have you read what others have written here (both before and after your post)? Have you talked with long-haired women about this topic? I have talked to many. Almost every one of them has been told (at least once if not more) by family, friend, aquaintance or stranger alike that they should cut their hair "when they turn 30/40/before-you-get-old". These unsolicited and critical messages would to them seem to be their hair-related, social pet peeve number one.
LOL. No. That not one person has spoken out here (of all places, on a long hair support board) in support of the myth would be expected.
Gee, I hadn't envisioned that scenario, StyleGuy. Typically the myth is expressed in gathering places where the offenders feel they can "get away with" stating their put-down, issued with the intent of influencing behavior.
I am in favor of people making choices of their own free will and unencumbered by social pressures. But that is not the case when it comes to people expressing the gotta-cut-short-by-40 mantra. Many women who have been perfectly happy with their long hair, but felt compelled by society's expectations to cut their hair after they reached a certain age milestone -- and felt rather sad about "having" to cut their hair shorter. It's action based merely on perceived fears, but opposed to their true wishes. These people need support -- not criticism.
They don't matter to me. But I don't believe in supporting their destructive expression of their issues. Why is it that the people who disseminate this myth feel the need to dictate their style preferences to others with the hope or expectation of compliance? To me, it just seems to be oddly controlling... sad and pathetic, really. ------------- |
Posted By: WUVIE
Date Posted: March 27 2004 at 5:29pm
|
I've said many times and I'll say it many more with regard to hair and age. It's similar to choosing the color towels in your bathroom. Who has such a lack of life to be concerned about other people's choices, so long as they don't affect anyone else? It's really rather silly to me, but then again, I'm not a social butterfly, either. I'm sure if I belonged to clubs and other cliquey organizations who lived for gossip, rumors and fashion, I'd give a hoot what others thought. But I don't. I live in the country, I have a lovely garden, pets, a great hubby and wonderful kids. Why on earth would I want to take time out of my day to concern myself with a stranger's opinion about my hair length or my age? I'm yet another year from 40, but don't have any immediate plans to cut my hair. If the moment strikes me, I'd gladly cut off a length of hair of my choosing, but not for age or fashion reasons. Life is too short to worry about these silly old wives' tales. Having said all that, I don't hesitate to say I've seen plenty of women of all ages who probably needed to cut their hair. Many women do not learn proper hair care during their lives, having relied on salons to 'fix' their hair every so often. When you hit 40 (unsure why that age is so significant with regard to fashion, guess I'll find out next May?) it seems the time everyone dons that infamous style...the poodle do. Not for me, thanks. It starts off shoulder length. Then shorter. And then shorter. And then what can you do with a few inches of hair? Yep, that poodle perm. Now granted, not everyone's cosmetic appearance is enhanced with long hair, but what looks more grand than a woman of age with glorious long locks which are well cared for? It is my opinion that age and hair length really have nothing to do with one another, but more the manner in which you wear it and the degree of care you take when grooming. Even young ladies with long stringy unkempt hair don't exactly ring the beauty bell. Now take that same girl / woman / fill-in-the-blank and teach her how to care for her length, and you've got a style that can't be beat. An inch of hair for each year of life? Sounds good to me. Karen Marie ------------- Karen Marie... / ACCOLADY "You never see Eve, Venus, or the Graces painted with cropped hair." |
Posted By: duke
Date Posted: March 28 2004 at 4:16am
|
I haven't seen too many poodle perms around, Karen Marie. Is it maybe the "thing" in your area? My mother's stylist parroted the advice about cutting hair when you're older, StyleGuy, and some previous stylists of hers may have done the same thing. I've also read a most abominable comment in a book or magazine that long hair becomes unflattering after "like, 17", so believe me, it's not a myth that many stylists would rather shear than maintain long hair. |
Posted By: StyleGuy
Date Posted: March 28 2004 at 12:23pm
If you don't want to believe me, how about these words from two of several very articulate long-haired people in this thread;
It doesn't seem to me that WUVIE is overly concerned, nor does it seem to be her pet peeve. How about this one from PurpleBubba;
Doesn't feel like a pet peeve there.
Ironically, I believe that by giving the myth as much credence as you do, you do end up supporting their 'destructive expression'. It's a little like the lone cop, uncovered in the bad guys hideout. In desperation, he tries to convince the bad guys that there are legions of cops outside, just waiting to pounce. To the extent that he can convince the bad guys that they are surrounded, he may actually succeed in having the bad guys surrender their position. It's a bit of a Straw Dog. In my opinion, if your aim is to encourage women (or, indeed, men too) who want to keep their hair long, you'll focus on the positive support from this community, rather than the negative and inconsequential opinions of those that just don't matter. ------------- |
Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: March 28 2004 at 8:36pm
|
StyleGuy, Perhaps you misunderstand my point. I'm not saying that that long-haired women believe the myth. I'm saying that they hear it spoken to them by others.
Again, perhaps you misunderstand my point...? I'm not saying that there is even a shred of truth to the myth, I'm merely stating that it seems to be widely-held among the population at large. Although I will add that I believe the myth is beginning to fade...
No, I don't believe that. I don't believe any of the women here is going to change their minds about having long hair because of this discussion. (laughs)
One discussion on the topic does not constitute a "focus" on the issue. Offering suggestions on how to deal with receipt of such comments, if and when they come, does constitute helpful support. Taking a moment to think about it and prepare for it is not necessarily a bad thing. ------------- |
Posted By: Rod
Date Posted: March 28 2004 at 9:28pm
|
Age can matter with hair length. Some women don't look as good with long hair as they get older, but then some women don't look as good with short hair either. Some women look like they are desperately trying to hold on to youth, while others look, well, hot, hot, hot. There should be no rule with women. The question should be, "Do I still look good with long hair?" Interestingly, I can think of three friends who have had long hair as long as I've known them who've said they'd love to have short hair, but are afraid to commit. Each has said they'll cut it when they hit 30, 35, or 40. They want to see themselves with short hair, just not right now. I don't think hitting a certain birthday should be the reason to try out a different hairstyle. I'm sure they'd each look good with long hair at 40, just as they would with short hair now. As for men, I think there isn't an age limit for long hair, but there is a hairline limit. When the hair line has receded really far, long hair just doesn't look good. I'll bet Dave will disagree with me, but there's my opinion. ------------- |
Posted By: Kintaro
Date Posted: March 29 2004 at 8:50am
|
Rod : I find some of the comment flawed. Long hair is not defined by the lifespan of your hairline, but if it is 2 bits short of a mullet, then it is ugly :P Search for Jim Corcoran....fugly. If I go out (I doubt, genetics so far are generous in that area) I'll go out with style :P ------------- I hate all of the following and lots more : Fundamentalists, racists, sexists, fascists, ageists (people saying seniors = senile , kids = stupid , 18 = immature or a combo of them), and bigots for causes yet to receive their own designation. |
Posted By: enfys
Date Posted: March 29 2004 at 11:19am
|
Has everyone forgotten the other arguement? Lomg hair on a teenager makes them look like a little kid? So they cut it? And leave school then grow it? I haven't given in to this pressure, and won't. Or is this just a Welsh thing? ------------- http://www.myspace.com/waltzin_with_the_open_sea - http://www.myspace.com/waltzin_with_the_open_sea Ah-ha, a place I can soon add hair pics...once I do some |
Posted By: DaveDecker
Date Posted: April 04 2004 at 12:54pm
Hi Rod, I don't disagree. How much did we make that bet for? I see a windfall on the horizon.  Or was that merely for $1? (shades of "Trading Places")Otherwise I generally agree with what you've said in your message, too. Whatever the person likes and wants, they should feel free to pursue without the burden of externally-applied pressures. And enfys -- Teenagers look like teenagers, with long hair or short. That is quite a strange mindset among the teenagers in your area. I don't know if its prevalent here in the U.S., if so, it's just flawed. ------------- |
Posted By: Kintaro
Date Posted: April 04 2004 at 1:21pm
|
Long hair takes time to grow, so if any vision should be made, it's the opposite. I'm always given about 23 for an age. (I'm 19). Then again, it isn't to bypass carding checks, since it's only 18 here anyways :P ------------- I hate all of the following and lots more : Fundamentalists, racists, sexists, fascists, ageists (people saying seniors = senile , kids = stupid , 18 = immature or a combo of them), and bigots for causes yet to receive their own designation. |
Posted By: LadyFrog
Date Posted: May 04 2005 at 4:18pm
| I kind of agree about the teenager/cut/long hair thing enfys. Although most people just ask me how long did it take for your hair to grow that long, I've had people tell me to get layers and shorten it a bit and that I would look better with short hair. Also, all the fashion addicts in our school have identikit shoulder length choppy layers so I kind of stand out a bit with long, basically unstyled hair. |
Posted By: eKatherine
Date Posted: May 04 2005 at 6:38pm
|
I'm taking a class at the local university. There are 13 students in the class. I think two of the women are short/gray, A couple with natural hair. All the rest have streaky highlights.
Two sitting next to each other got their hair flat-razored with platinum, ash blond, ash brown, and weird red highlights. It doesn't look good on either of them. ------------- 
Just looking for a few good hair slaves - is that too much to ask? |