I'm losing it...feelin' ugly
Printed From: HairBoutique.com
Category: Long Hair Happenings
Forum Name: Long Hair Support
Forum Description: Growing it long takes commitment and support.
URL: https://talk.hairboutique.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=47757
Printed Date: September 29 2024 at 4:30am
Topic: I'm losing it...feelin' ugly
Posted By: strawberryfine
Subject: I'm losing it...feelin' ugly
Date Posted: October 19 2006 at 12:28pm
|
Hi again, I really need to vent. I am sooooo depressed. Just got diagnosed with an eye disorder and had to give up eye make up. I have bags and swelling under my eyes and I'm not pretty. I recently cut fringes, then cut 4" in length to get rid of old layers and bleached ends- it's still 22". I have fair/very light skin, a biggish forehead. I don't think I'm a candidate for eye bag surgery as the incision is made where my eye gland disfunction is located-scar tissue; My aunt hates my fringes; my significant guy loves them and I am just confused. Sometimes I like them; sometimes I don't. What do you do when you really want long pretty hair and you just feel like your face is well, just plain ugly? I could use any support anyone has to spare. I am about ready to shave my head and put a bag over it... I love the look of no bangs but sometimes feel the need to hide part of my face...sometimes I like the bangs look...
Please help...
 SF ------------- strawberryfine 2aFii 12/25.5"/terminal length after reaching "small of my back length" |
Replies:
Posted By: arch94
Date Posted: October 19 2006 at 12:55pm
|
hey straw,
i'm fairly certain that you posted some pics of yourself from the front a few years back. your hair was then closer to shoulder length. am i right?
i remember thinking then that you are a very pretty girl. i think your hair is looking absolutley great now as far as i can tell from your sig pic.
and if you are upset now and crying, then your face and eyes i'm sure are not looking your best.
and the best new is that the sun will come up tomorrow and it'll be a new day. good luck to you! ------------- We all know what opinions are like...and I've got both! |
Posted By: Bob S
Date Posted: October 19 2006 at 1:48pm
 First of all, Strawberry, you seem to have issues from your past which should be dead and buried. Your hair is incredible, and will only become moreso as it gains length.
I've noticed that many women magnify facial and body flaws, sometimes to the point of self- destruction. Surprisingly, those who castigate their appearance include many of THE most beautiful women. I admit that I don't comprehend what I hear from them sometimes. As for you, since I don't have a clue what you look like, all I can say is that even *if* you are plain, the way you carry yourself can make you attractive, even beautiful, to many guys. Ultimately, you yourself will believe it too! Stunning long hair alone, such as you possess, is worth 50 points out of a possible 100 on any beauty scale. So you have an excellent head start!
I'll bet that you, with or without fringe, look ravishing. I guess what I'm saying, Strawberry, is that the "shave and bag it" routine would not be a good idea! (lol) Blessings, Bob
 |
Posted By: Susan W
Date Posted: October 20 2006 at 2:52pm
|
If you wanted to grow long hair in the past (which I know you did), you
must have found it beautiful. Why even think of shaving it off
when you already know you find it pretty, so would probably be very
happy with it on yourself, and feel more beautiful? I don't think
I'm all that hot, and my age is starting to show, but my hair makes me
feel beautiful some days, and I really enjoy that feeling.
Keep your hair for how happy it will make you on the good days! I know how it feels think parts of yourself make you ugly, but really, I do agree with Bob that we overdramatize that. Then we make others think we are ugly by "acting ugly" (hiding or acting underconfident), then when others pick up on that they treat us like we're ugly and only reinforce for us that we were right - we are ugly! Insulting yourself only makes you feel worse, and starts a painful cycle because somehow, others can always tell when a person is underconfident and many just LOVE to make us feel worse for some reason! My point is that even if you don't like the way you look right now, don't let it ever make you feel like you are "less than" others. You are not. ------------- Making metal barettes/concord clips hair safe, long hair style how to: http://alonghair.wordpress.com |
Posted By: SugarCube
Date Posted: October 20 2006 at 7:00pm
I'm feel for ya girl.  Sometimes we just havve our bad days and I whole-heartedly agree with Bob(I LOVE that name!) on the confidence issue. I know people that are called preety simply because the way they hold themselves. Hope ya feel better soon and if it makes you feel better I have a forehead the size of my hand. ( and I have a big hand! )------------- JESUS is The Way the Truth and The Life! |
Posted By: SpecialKitty
Date Posted: October 21 2006 at 12:08pm
|
Strawberryfine......(((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))). Whenever I have had a physical challenge or illness, my self esteem has plummeted. Just when my body needs the most love and care, I feel less than perfect, ugly, or inconsequential. I think there is a link to having physical problems crop up in our lives and feeling bad about ourselves. You body needs you right now to heal your eyes and take care of the rest of it (including your hair) so that you can move forward and be healthy. You are beautiful. You are loved. Keep saying that to yourself over and over until you believe it. And, it sounds like your guy is very supportive. Don't listen to your Aunt or anyone else who says anything negative about your appearance. Please be well and let us know how you're doing. By the way, I have an incredibly large forhead, a wide nose, and a few scars on my face (biggest scar is on my forehead!). (((((((((((((((BIG HUG FOR STRAWBERRY!)))))))))))))) ------------- 
|
Posted By: strawberryfine
Date Posted: October 21 2006 at 5:45pm
|
Arch, Bob, Susan, Sugarcube, SpecialKitty,
I am saving every one of your posts. You people here are just incredible. I am feeling better today and have decided to get rid of the fringe. I just like that sleek look. My guy is supportive of the fringes, not too much without them, but I've decided to wear it without them and just do what I want to do. As for my aunt, she would criticize my appearance no matter what. I guess when I got over all the "I'm not too _______fill in the blank, to have long hair--too old, thin hair, etc., I needed to work on the "I'm not too ________, ugly, plain, etc. to let ALL my hair grow out. So I'm working on that now. The upside is that although it is a few inches shorter, I got rid of the layers and old bleach on the ends and when my fringes grow out to the length of the rest of my hair (22" now) the length will be past my waist. I think the whole no eyemakeup thing really got me but I'm getting over that. Curling the lashes makes them look longer and I'm concentrating on clothing, colors and accessories. I went out this morning and bought a bunch of ribbons in beautiful colors to hold my fringes back while they grow and a few small, wire back barrettes. I'm going to try to post some new pics soon.
Thanks so much!
Love ya all!
SF ------------- strawberryfine 2aFii 12/25.5"/terminal length after reaching "small of my back length" |
Posted By: SpecialKitty
Date Posted: October 22 2006 at 6:39pm
|
So glad to hear you're feeling better. I meant to hug you, not the word hug!!! Hehe. So ((((((((((((((Strawberryfine)))))))))))))))) -------------
|
Posted By: strawberryfine
Date Posted: October 24 2006 at 2:02pm
|
Thank you, Special Kitty!
You are so sweet and I am feeling much better today. By the way, I just love your name, as I am a cat lover; I have three.
SF ------------- strawberryfine 2aFii 12/25.5"/terminal length after reaching "small of my back length" |
Posted By: AnaisSatin
Date Posted: October 25 2006 at 12:16am
|
Hey SF, I just wanted to say that I just took a gander at your avatar, and MAN OH MAN has your hair changed! It's long and shiny and gorgeousss. Big hugs to you. Have an extra happy hair day.
love
Anais ------------- http://anaissatin.livejournal.com">  my LJ , 40 inches long
|